And this is why I'm no longer a gender abolitionist. Some people very clearly get so much out of representing as they identify.
Though I still think gender roles should be entirely fluid in a liberal society, though.
I prefer gender anarchist myself. Individual people can have whatever gender they want, but the government and institutions in society should stay the fuck out of it
Gender anarchist! I like it!
That's exactly why I'm NB (and why my pronouns are they/any) - gender as a social construct is dumb. However, everyone should be able to express themselves however they want in the way that makes them the happiest.
Apple I'm so happy for you and I wish you the absolute best
I don't really know the first thing about trans people or what it all really means on an individual level like you described your anticipation of, but I make sure to check in because I get to see shit like this.
I got to see a person be outwardly dumbfounded about how happy they could be, by being their self.
I wish I could have a realization like that, but I honestly don't give too big a shit because I saw you do that, and I'm beyond stoked for you.
Keep killing it, and don't ever stop spreading that joy.
If it helps to add...
what does dysphoria feel like?
have you ever had a day where you just feel like when you're happy, it's not a 'true, genuine happiness'? A veil over your deeper mood, to hide what you truly feel?
know how happiness feels like a flame in the heart lifting you up with joy, and depression is like the feeling being gradually sucked away out of your heart, to your lower limbs, down, feeling apathetic?
likewise, watching in the mirror pre-passing for me felt like a mix of cold indifference, apathy and grumpiness, below the veil of whatever you appeared to feel. you can feel 'happy', 'sad', 'meh', whatever... but it doesn't quite feel right. seeing your body feel 'off', like the deeper feel that you realise you entered the wrong bathroom*; a sinking and ebbing turmoil of dread and indifference.
a bathroom break rant
* imho, there is no 'wrong' bathroom, as i find the idea of segregating restroom needs by gender to be silly. everyone needs to go. just install period bins in all of them, replace the signs with 'toilet' and done. all of them should have stalls for privacy. same with changing rooms, really.
also, some people don't take HRT, others only have GAS, others mostly focus on clothes and the like. it's all valid.
what does euphoria feel like?
But, after you start passing, taking HRT, had GAS, taking on the right clothes (be that with a few adjustments like laser, tucking, or packing) ... the happiness is indescribable.
The emotional ectasy you feel when you fall in love, the 'kick' you get for doing an exciting activity (like a rollercoaster) the first time in your life, the feeling of a great massage that rejuvenates your body, the warmth of a good shower - that is similar. It feels like you are finally all warm and calm inside, as if the veil of greyness folds itself away for the clarity of colour for the first time, and lifts your breast up. It feels like you breathe again, and can now cry in happiness because of it.
and after that first good tsunami of feelings, even then, it still feels like you have healed more. as if you know it'll all be better after that, finally going into the right direction.
hope that all helps understand it!
another anecdote from me
when i first started taking HRT, i just cried. i felt like overjoyed and felt a big surge of relief. once I started passing six months in, i began taking more pictures of myself. pre hrt, I took less than ten dozen pictures of myself in total. after that? 700. I feel so much better now that I feel freed, to express myself as I want.
the only two things i'd personally still want are GAS (soon!) and a uterus transplant to bear a child, but other than that, I feel happy.
terminology:
HRT = hormone replacement therapy; where you take hormones to change your body altogether.
GAS = gender-affirming surgery. more commonly known as SRS (sex reassignment surgery).
pass = to convincingly feel as the desired gender in terms of appearance
tucking = the practice of hiding your dick by 'tucking' it into your body.
packing = the practice of making a dick apparent by 'packing' stuff down there
Quick, she's giving away all our secrets! Getter!
LMFAO
It does, I appreciate you laying a lot of that out
no problems! if you've more questions, feel free to ask away, however strange and/or odd!
SO TRUE womanhood is awesome I'm so glad I discovered myself :) I am happy to be alive rather than just existing cus I was told to
i absolutely agree, but you know what else?
i fuckin' LOVE being trans! how cool is it that we get to experience both sides of the gender spectrum?? or the fact that we get to take this big part of shaping our own bodies
i am grateful in so many ways that I wasn't born cis 🥰
Absolute mood. I consider myself unapologetically trans. Its hard to exemplify that a lot of times but it feels so good when I can.
I'm so happy for you!! I can say that like. Even over a decade in to transition I still love being a woman. Ive talked to trans women who say that it faded for them with time but I think that just never really happened with me. I get gender euphoria all the time and it feels so awesome getting to be a girl. I know how amazing that feeling is and how much it saved my own life. I'm glad that you get to experience it too :)
So happy for you that you're comfortable being you!
Loving girls hits different from the lesbian perspective.
Me too sister. Life got better when I self accepted, then it got way better when I started hrt.
You are so very beautiful, the light in your eyes is so clear and bright. Life will still throw all it's shit at you but you know you're doing the right thing for yourself now. Transitioning is life saving. Now you get to live the life you saved.
That hook from the Shania Twain song makes more and more sense every day.
"Man, I feel like a woman!" I'll scream it from the rooftops
Saaaame! Yay women! I love women and being a woman!
Preach. There are ups and downs but overall it's kept getting better.
The ultimate mood <3
Ofc you are,women are better in any possible way
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