If it helps to add...

what does dysphoria feel like?

have you ever had a day where you just feel like when you're happy, it's not a 'true, genuine happiness'? A veil over your deeper mood, to hide what you truly feel?

know how happiness feels like a flame in the heart lifting you up with joy, and depression is like the feeling being gradually sucked away out of your heart, to your lower limbs, down, feeling apathetic?

likewise, watching in the mirror pre-passing for me felt like a mix of cold indifference, apathy and grumpiness, below the veil of whatever you appeared to feel. you can feel 'happy', 'sad', 'meh', whatever... but it doesn't quite feel right. seeing your body feel 'off', like the deeper feel that you realise you entered the wrong bathroom*; a sinking and ebbing turmoil of dread and indifference.

a bathroom break rant

* imho, there is no 'wrong' bathroom, as i find the idea of segregating restroom needs by gender to be silly. everyone needs to go. just install period bins in all of them, replace the signs with 'toilet' and done. all of them should have stalls for privacy. same with changing rooms, really.

also, some people don't take HRT, others only have GAS, others mostly focus on clothes and the like. it's all valid.

what does euphoria feel like?

But, after you start passing, taking HRT, had GAS, taking on the right clothes (be that with a few adjustments like laser, tucking, or packing) ... the happiness is indescribable.

The emotional ectasy you feel when you fall in love, the 'kick' you get for doing an exciting activity (like a rollercoaster) the first time in your life, the feeling of a great massage that rejuvenates your body, the warmth of a good shower - that is similar. It feels like you are finally all warm and calm inside, as if the veil of greyness folds itself away for the clarity of colour for the first time, and lifts your breast up. It feels like you breathe again, and can now cry in happiness because of it.

and after that first good tsunami of feelings, even then, it still feels like you have healed more. as if you know it'll all be better after that, finally going into the right direction.

hope that all helps understand it!

another anecdote from me

when i first started taking HRT, i just cried. i felt like overjoyed and felt a big surge of relief. once I started passing six months in, i began taking more pictures of myself. pre hrt, I took less than ten dozen pictures of myself in total. after that? 700. I feel so much better now that I feel freed, to express myself as I want.

the only two things i'd personally still want are GAS (soon!) and a uterus transplant to bear a child, but other than that, I feel happy.

terminology:

HRT = hormone replacement therapy; where you take hormones to change your body altogether.

GAS = gender-affirming surgery. more commonly known as SRS (sex reassignment surgery).

pass = to convincingly feel as the desired gender in terms of appearance

tucking = the practice of hiding your dick by 'tucking' it into your body.

packing = the practice of making a dick apparent by 'packing' stuff down there