We should offer these two doctors' services for free penis enlargements to all billionaires.

Hey Musk I got a proposition for ya

Belgian-Israeli businessman Ehud Arye Laniado, founder of Omega Diamonds, suffered a fatal heart attack while undergoing injections intended to enlarge his penis.

...

However, prosecutors later downgraded the charges to failure to assist a person in danger, drug-related offences, and practising medicine without a licence.

Call me paranoid, but I'd like anyone giving me penis injections to be licensed to practice medicine.

This is way more efficient than putting them each in a submarine

An autopsy later confirmed that Laniado died from cardiac hypertrophy, a condition involving an enlarged heart.

A search of his hotel room revealed he had been taking multiple substances banned in France, along with vasodilators commonly used to treat erectile dysfunction. According to judicial sources, these substances are believed to have contributed to his death.

Ah, so it had nothing to do with the procedure, dude was on a cocktail of his own drugs, didn't tell the doctor, had a heart attack.

So, if it was anyones fault, it was the pathetic billionaires fault. Also anyone who gets rich from diamonds is always, 100%, a scumbag.

He died while the procedure was being performed at a private clinic in March 2019

I wondered why he wasn’t answering my calls! Why are we only just finding out about this now?

Lol. Lmao. Dude had billions of dollars and fucken died cause he wanted a bigger dick.

I still think autoerotic asphyxiation is the most embarrassing way to die, but, thanks to this article, I’ve now been introduced to a close second.

The fact that he was a billionaire diamond magnate just makes it easier to laugh.

So the operation was a 100% succes.

Damn what a way to go, now the whole world knows he had a small dick as the last thing he does.

Number one. Steady hand. One day, billionaire need big penis. I do operation. But mistake! Billionaire die! Capitalists very mad! I hide fishing boat, come to America. No English, no food, no money. Darryl give me job. Now I have house, American car and new woman. Darryl save life.

My big secret. I kill billionaire on purpose. I good surgeon. The best!

I can't believe being a billionaire wasn't enough for this man, he was still insecure that he felt the need to buy a bigger dick.

I don't know who needs to hear this, but women don't need a gorilla sized dick! They need you to eat them out! (this guy had a wife. We need to ask men if they crave gorilla dicks)

I applaud billionaire willing to die to show us what's right and wrong. Submarine excursions when you have no clue what you're doing, ruining the lives of millions with price hikes, penis enlargement surgery with unlicensed surgeons… keep at it billionaires. Let's step: going to Mars without a backup plan, because thinking things ahead is for pussy. You can do it!

Let this be an example to every surgeon out there that if a billionaire patient dies during or after a surgery:

It can't simply be a statistical death, their trusts will have investigators digging through your trash for years and feeding a team of laywers to find the slightest excuse to end your career even if they die because they were taking party drugs and weren't honest with you.

Its best to just refuse doing surgery on a billionaire.

Comrade Penis Enlargement Surgeon, the surgery was a great success! You are now heroes of socialism like Comrade Whale, Comrade Bee, and Comrade crushing pressure of deep ocean.

“There was something futile and sad about trying to find someone responsible at all costs, following a purely accidental death.“

This was purely a case of litigation because they were a billionaire.

The “unlicensed” surgeon? Had an Algerian degree, which was a French colony, that’s just racism.

They were clearly just throwing charges at them until something stuck, presumably at the rich inheritor’s request.

And nothing of value was lost.

Kind of weird that the surgeons are implicated to have caused it in the headline, when he died of a heart problem unrelated to the cosmetic surgery.

You'd think the drugs and medications he was taking would be more at fault in that case.

You think these needledicks would learn from Elons botched surgery.

Won at the game of life (i.e. being a billionaire), still insecure about your PP

Now this is a feel good story

oh!

so is that how we'll be rid of billionaires?

So pathetic they tried to pin this on the surgeon too.

The lead surgeon, identified only as “Guy H.”, was initially investigated on suspicion of manslaughter. However, prosecutors later downgraded the charges to failure to assist a person in danger, drug-related offences, and practising medicine without a licence.

Investigators determined that the injection itself was not responsible for Laniado’s death.

A judicial source told Le Parisien that the procedure was “quickly ruled out” as the cause.

Including the 32 billionaires that died last year, that's just over 1% of all billionaires removed from this Earth! That's not an insignificant number. Let's make it even higher!

And nothing of value was lost.

Now there's a fucking Darwin Award

The penis was purported to be so epic its legend stretched 7 years into the future, from a Parisian clinic to an Indian online news site.

🍆

Thank you for your service, penis enlargement surgeons.

Musk had the same thing, but his came out all butchered.

> be me
> have money
> like "i can get away with pedophilia" money
> can get any woman i want
> lil' me won't get hard
> gold digger says it's ok, i can hear her laugh
> everyone giggles when i'm around
> hear rumors of how i was cheated by every gf and wife
> time to fix this shit
> coke'n cialis combo
> get dick surgery
> get ready for the pornstar dick, bitches!
> unlicensed medics
> forgot to tell them i was high af
> die in surgery\

Guess this needs to be updated?

"Belgian-Israeli businessman Ehud Arye Laniado, founder of Omega Diamonds, suffered a fatal heart attack while undergoing injections intended to enlarge his penis."

At least we get some good news this year.

it seems like the operation failed. there's fewer dicks in the world now.