I'm 30, transfem, and to be quite honest, I feel my will to live slowly slipping away. I'm trying to find the willpower to finish my PhD thesis and to get into a better living situation after that, but I find myself frozen and wanting to curl up into a tiny ball of nothingness instead. And there are LOTS of reasons for that, mostly centered around trauma, guilt, and shame.

I don't think I can fit everything I need to say in a succinct post, so if it isn't against the rules, would any of you fellow girlies be willing to shoot me a DM and give some advice? I don't think I can really explain without having a back-and-forth conversation... thanks in advance. 🏳️‍⚧️💜

Hey girls and friends!

I am kinda timid even if I really like social contact, and for most of my life I have mostly had guy friends. I guess it's because it's easier to approach and be approched by guys when you whole body says that you are a guy... Also I was a student in computer science so there are mostly guys. Essentially my close-friends group is mostly trans girls and non-binary AFAB and guys. It's been a bit of an anxiety of mine that cis women wouldn't see me as a woman, but as a kinda creepy guy....

This week I contacted an old girl-friend of mine from Highschool and suggested that we had a drink since we hadn't seen each other in years. I also came out by message. The discussion at the bar was great and it was basically the first time that a cis woman welcomed me into womanhood. She discussed about how being a woman was awesome and that I will love it. This is so great. I have essentially never had a AFAB person tell me how womanhood is great, only about how bad it is.

Yesterday I attended another social event and the few girls there also treated me as one of their own. So yay, I place this week under the umbrella of "Being accepted by cis girls" and I love it! Much acceptance and validation <3

How's it for you? How was your week?

Feel free to suggest in the comments :) Just looking for something relatable to listen to while commuting or doing household chores xx

I was surprised by how much I've changed in the last month. And in this photo I look so different compared to when I look in the mirror.

Right now I'm at 11 months HRT and had 12 laser hair removal sessions. I'm 32 years old and you can check out my profile for any previous progress pics.

Bank person: Can I see some ID please?
Me: (Hands over driver's license with old photo)
Bank person: (Checks)
Bank person: Err.
Bank person: (Checks some more)
Bank person: Is this your husband?

I'm going to be grinning about this all week :3

Hello fellow everyone my name is CyaraKaira transgender woman originally from Uganda… I fled my home country due persecution that resulted from the Anti-homosexual bill. I fled to Kenya where I was put in a refugee camp. Here I faced a lot of persecution more than what I faced from my home country. I beaten several times, stripped naked, cut with machetes andremovedd on several occasions. My life was really hell that I had to flee to South Sudan a war country and mostly with hostile people. You may ask I chose this country it’s because I had no choice honestly but it was the nearest to where I was. I’m currently facing lots of challenges including lack of food and medication. I have been sick for week now but have no help. I will be glad for your support to access medication any donations will mean a lot. I’m also will to share my story because I have a lot to share. Thank you

https://gofund.me/bd40a4f9

Sorry, this is pretty much just me venting, but it is related to me being trans.

Anyways, I got my first pair of women's glasses yesterday. I was very excited and euphoric, but I somehow managed to scratch them today while I was fiddling with the nose pads. Fortunately the eyeglass place has a warranty for lens scratches, but I unfortunately had to use it less than 24 hours after getting my glasses. They said they have never seen an adult scratch their glasses that fast...

I also have a hearing soon to get my legal sex changed however I also have jury duty. I had called the court a while back to see if I could reschedule and they basically said that it's my problem, not theirs, and now that it is getting close to time, I am freaking out because idk what I'm going to do if they call me in when I have my hearing.

On top of that, I also have midterms this week so I'm stressed out from that as well. I just drank the last of my alcohol, but unfortunately maladaptive coping mechanisms aren't actually that effective (Who would have thought).

Makes me feel super dysphoric - currently I already have a discernible M shape on my forehead (short-medium hair ATM, growing it out) -.- Any tips on what I can do before going on hormones? Could that hair grow back once I'm on them? Any hairstyling advice?

[Engagement from anyone welcome]

Context, informed consent is a thing here and I will likely be starting HRT in the next month or two. Here is what my thought process has been for the last year since beginning to socially transition, although very slowly.

• I should buy feminine clothes
• I don't want to have to buy new clothes once my measurements (hopefully) change from HRT
• I will wait to buy feminine clothes

• I should practice makeup
• Makeup makes dysphoria worse
• I should start HRT / look into FFS
• I will wait to practice makeup

• I should start HRT
• I haven't earned that; I don't dress or present fem
• Kick can down the road for HRT

The good news is I called a doctor last week to schedule the appointment! So things are progressing. Just wanted to see if any guys, gals, or pals have had a similar experience with their transition, or seen someone else go through that.

I LOVE WEARING A SKIRT

MY LEGS ARE SMOOTH AND SWISHING A SKIRT IS SO GOOD

I FEEL SO FEMININE AND I LOVE IT

AHHHHHH EUPHORIA

I've been in therapy for a few months and I really want to start HRT soon but I don't know if my therapist will write me the required letter. If she doesn't by the end of this month I'm going to start doing DIY, is there anything I should know about the process before I get started, anything I should be aware of? Are there risks or side effects. Things that I should be aware of before going in

P.S. Don't give me any of that crap about detransitioning, you don't know me well enough to say I would, frankly I'll never call myself a boy again, not of my own volition or to capitulate to others.

Edit: Thank you all so much for the information and resources, sorry if I wasn't able to respond to people's comments sooner, things have been hard and I've been busy lately.

New to the community, but lurking for ever and stuck inside my egg for the past decade. I finally hit the wall where I was either going to come out or break down. So far, I'm super lucky to have a fantastic and understanding spouse who has my back, but that's literally the extent of my support network. I've always been pretty shy and impersonal, so I have a very tiny friend group. That said, I'm over 40 and can't wait to transition any longer. I just can't seem to find any physicians in my area that I don't think will either deny me care or treat me like I'm a liar. I'm fine with going straight to an endochrinoligist and signing an informed consent, but I really think I should see a therapist or counselor about some things I've been struggling with. I'm just having a difficult time of knowing who I can and can't trust, and I don't really have anyone around to ask. The only out transfem I know is a professional acquaintance and I'm way too scared to out myself to her yet. I've gone through most of the publicly available lists and tools for finding practitioners but they either don't take my insurance or don't cover my area. Does anyone have any advice on how to approach this? I want to get started so badly because I feel like I already missed out on so much of life as my true self, but the roadblock now seems to be that I can't even trust my family physician to know who I really am.

its been 5 years.

fuck.

I've wanted to transition for a 4th of my life now and I still don't have enough control over my life to be me.

i would probably hate myself so much less if i had started hrt and transitioning when i wanted to.

rant over ill probably delete this post i just needed to vent im sorry

Some choice quotes from the last time I saw a thread like this:

• When I was 8 someone told me that girls go to college to get more knowledge, and boys go to jupiter to get more stupider. And obviously I took that personally ReverendPancakes
• I grew bewbs from the COVID vaccine and decided it was easier to just run with it. DepressivesBrot
• Smaller hitboxes Fantasygoria
• I drank tap water and soy milk.
• life was too easy, so i increased the difficulty setting and this is what happened hdj103
• Clearly because women have such an easier time in life DrHob0
• According to my Mormon ultra right wing father: I have an infatuation with the female body and was bitten by the social contagion bug and there is no cure. The reasoning for this belief is I once told him I don't think that people who watch porn are bad/going to hell, and I didn't see it as a problem for someone to watch it. So to recap. I watched porn. Saw naked woman. Went wow v pretty I wanna look like that. Then took hormones👍 mist_wraith_
• I personally felt that my safe access to public bathrooms was too damn high froglipsmulligan
• I couldn't get a goth gf so I became the goth gf A_Sneaky_Dickens
• Better bouyancy when swimming Blah-Blah-Blah-2023
• To bring down western civilization. MyynMyyn
• Because I was a hitman for organized crime but I got caught. Transitioning was my only option when I went into witness protection when I ratted out my employers. Dakotaisapotato
• So I can balance my phone on my boobs instead of having to hold it when I’m relaxing and watching YouTube Somethingintheway245
• I wanted to study tiddy jiggle physics for animation purposes DaAwesomeNeko
• Um, girls rule, boys drool, duh. MyconautAlien
• I signed up for a trial gender & forgot to cancel. Better_Image_5859
• There were too many dudes in my field (engineering) so I got auto-balanced. Cassie_Darkborn
• So I'd be less embarrassed when choosing a female character in games. throwaway_eclipse1
• A drag queen started reading a book out loud while I was in the same room. ATransFemalePerson
• My eyelashes were too long to not corncrakey
• To get cheaper auto insurance rates 👍 Various_Ad_4533
• Because that shark plushie was just too damn cute not to buy 🏳️‍⚧️🦈 KingOfRedLlamas
• I started programming and just accidentally became a girl. swiftsorceress
• I used a bunch of drugs and wanted to move on to something harder. So I started taking estrogen. Kept chasing the high. Oops, now I have tits and an ass. FecalAlgebra
• I wanted conservatives to have strong opinions on what I do with my body. ususetq
• Because I sarcastically said "well I have the legs for it" every time the prospect of me wearing women's clothing came up in conversation in high school. I had to continue the bit. MC_White_Thunder
• No one ever talked to me at the bar and I got tired of buying my own drinks.
• Because I got infected with “The Gay(tm)” as I have no agency of my own SpicyNovaMaria
• I accidentally checked the wrong box on the presurgical paperwork and woke up with boobs Wzd_JA
• In case I have to kill the Witch-king of Angmar SmoothSoup

cross-posted from: https://lemmy.blahaj.zone/post/22341287

Hello gamers,

the first version of the pitch overlay is now available on github. It works on Linux and is somewhat of a mess for Windows (it will be fixed in the coming days, read the documentation).

Obviously it's open source, so feel free to mess with it!

Any feedback is appreciated, report bugs and stuff via github.

Here is the link: Yippie Link

Read the readme! Don't be like me!

If you don't know what I'm referring to, check this post

Tl;dr: It's a tool similar to the app voice tools to help you see your voice's current pitch, to potentially aid in voice training while at your puter :3

Title. Need to loose weight. Already going to be hard enough loosing weight in the first place but also keep getting a nagging thought that I'll impede my breast development. Currently on HRT.

I know loosing weight for my health is more important than my breasts. Still hits me hard though that they won't develop if I'm on caloric restriction. Am I being insane or uninformed?

I work for a large multinational that just removed all of its LGBTQ+ things. Nothing on the website anymore, nothing internally. Just poof, gone like it never existed. It feels like we are going back too medieval times..

I am not part of the LGBTQ+ community but I just wanted to say too anyone who feels let down by these big organizations: I still support you, my colleagues still support you. You are still welcome and accepted by many. We will continue fighting for you.

I don't know, just wanted to say that.

Hey girls! I'm a plus sized trans woman in my mid 20's. I've always enjoyed swimming, but I havent done it since i began my transition over a year ago. Id really like to start swimming again this year, and id especially love to do so in an outfit that makes me feel good about myself.

The biggest concern that has stopped me is that i really dont want to have a visible bulge. Ive had some success with gaffs, but also a bit of an... incident involving short shorts. Bathing suits are obviously a bit trickier. I would welcome any reccomendations about brands, styles or techniques that would help me feel confident and feminine at the pool!

Does anyone know how long (if it happens at all) are testicules irreversibly atrophied from HRT? Basically I'm scared that if I stop HRT they'll just go back to working the way they always have and I'm hoping that they won't.

I've been on HRT mono therapy for a year now and my testosterone has been nearly totally suppressed for the whole time, so I wonder if the girls are done for essentially...

“dad

do you remember what i said about using the name ‘cara’ with me?

i wasn’t joking

what do you mean son

well

i’ve been having dysphoria for a while

so i want to try to present as a girl 😅

if it’s okay with you, i think im trans

oh

ok 👍

i think it’ll take me some time to get used to it but if you want to be a girl and it’ll make you happier then i don’t have any problem with that

good luck with everything my daughter ❤️“

Hewwo gwuys :3

I am quite a bit spooked by the permanent effects of HRT, but I rlllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllly want a feminine body type! I would like to ask whether the fat redistribution of mtf will last even after I stop taking estrogen? Theoretically if I were to take estrogen for 1-2 years (as I understand thats how long the full effect may take?) while I put on a bit of a weight to get da curves, would any stick on after I stop the e? I intend to limit the breast growth with raloxifene

I unfortunately cannot really ask a doctor and the theoretical thought process would be a DIY… In Hungary the rumor is that trans folk might be put on a witch hunt since our far right government is loosing favor with the ppl…

I'm an enby and soon to start HRT.

I just had a strange conversation with a friend is saying that estrogen is messing up their dopamine levels.

They said on the pills, they felt ok, but the dose was too low. And then switching to weekly injections, they get a high for 4 days and then they have like a depressive crash on the last 3 days.

It's started a little bit of a spiral for me as god knows I've struggled with brain chemicals all my life. From drepression to anxiety and back and forth, but I've been doing much better the past year.

And so I'm kind of freaking out that estrogen will make me spin out.

Has anyone else had issues like this with the injections. I know its very subjective what people feel.

Last night I had a dream where I was socially interacting as male, had male anatomy, etc. - it usually disturbs me when I wake up and realize my unconscious is operating this way, it feels like I don't see myself as a woman, which is true on a conscious level but it's painful when I don't even see myself as a woman in my dreams.

Sometimes even before transition trans women see themselves as women in their dreams, and I marvel at that. I think part of my denial was integrating every internal part of me that felt female as being actually authentically male, that all men are actually feminine in this way or that. So the authentically feminine parts of me still feel "male".

Anyway, I just wanted to do a quick poll and see:

(if any transmasc folks or enbies are reading this, I would love your input too, even though I'm using gendered language, I don't mean to be excluding)

• did you have dreams where you were a woman before you transitioned?
• what was the process like of your internal concept changing as you transitioned?
• when did you start appearing as a woman in your dreams post-transition? (did the frequency increase post-transition, what was that change like?)
• how do you relate to your self-conception, does it disturb you to be a man in your dreams, is it a relief to be a woman in your dreams?