One of the few things I miss on Reddit is a sub called "Ididnthaveeggs" or something like that. Basically a whole sub of the bonkers substitutions people have done. It was always a good read.
1/5 stars
I didn't have sugar, butter, vanilla, or baking powder, and I substituted the milk with cheddar cheese. Also, I don't have an oven, so I just used a frying pan on the stove top. It turned into an omelet! Would not recommend this cake recipe.
7/11 with rice
I tried to make fried eggs but I didn't have eggs so I replaced them with ice cream.
0/10 hot ice cream soup isn't fried eggs!!
Carrots having way too much sugar is wild to me. Like what do you eat except kale?
More kale
I mean, carrots do have a lot of sugar as vegetables go, but it’s like 5% sugar by weight. If you’re cutting out stuff with that low of a ratio, you’re probably taking a low sugar diet a bit far.
I wouldn't eat a raw carrot either unless I'm looking for a sugar shock but this is like one ingredient of a cake, a fucking CAKE!! What else did you supplement?
I wouldn't eat a raw carrot either unless I'm looking for a sugar shock
Are you literally out of your mind? Sugar shock from A CARROT??
Are you sure you're not confusing “a raw carrot“ with "a big bag of candy"? It's a common mistake in some cultures, I bet 🤷
I'm not an expert on that but I'm pretty sure I was joking
Upon further consideration as well as evaluation of your supplementary information, I have concluded that you were in fact joking.
I have furthermore decided that your joke was funny and that I'm a bit of a doofus for going all in on my "they're super serial" hypothesis.
Have a lovely day 😁
Traditionally carrots were used as the main sweetener in carrot cake. Something developed during lean times when honey, fruits and sugar weren’t available. So assuming this person was looking for a “low sugar cake” recipe, they may have found a carrot cake recipe that only used carrots for sweetening.
… and then they removed the carrots to reduce the sugar content further. So yah it’s going to be an awful cake if there is zero sweetness in it. Like, just make a savory baked good at that point.
They're making a cake, you don't want sugar in cake!
I asked you for directions to Santa Monica but I decided to drive to the Mojave instead and there was NO BEACH AND NO OCEAN.
2/5 stars, wouldn’t recommend Santa Monica
Carrots have way too much sugar?? To go in a cake?? Wut
If carrots have too much sugar for you, sweety, don't bake a fucking cake.
So in cooking, I tend to do this sort of thing all the time, but not in a dumb way - for example, when I roast a chicken, if I want a more Asian spin on it, I’d sub out my usual herbs de Provence + fresh parsley/sage/rosemary/thyme for chili crisp, ginger, sambal olek, minced Thai basil, and a bit of cilantro, or something like that.
But in baking, there’s actual chemistry involved with almost everything, so you do not want to fuck with that unless you actually know what you’re doing..
any site worth their salt would remove these reviews as they aren't based off the product posted since they subbed items
“I tried playing my DOOM: The Dark Ages copy for Xbox but I don’t own an Xbox so I put the disk in my Nintendo 64. The game didn’t even launch wtf this game sucks”
You forgot the bit where they cut the disk so it would fit in the slot, and are also upset that the store won't return it anymore.
There’s a sub for this on the other site, called “Didn’tHaveEggs”. It’s funny as.
I've replaced the celery in the raw celery recipe with pizza. Why am I not losing weight?
Do people just substitute things that look similar?
I didn't like egg whites, so I used soap instead. Ew, it tastes like soap!
chef_the_kiss ★☆☆☆☆
I replaced the vanilla extract with balsamic vinegar and it tasted like a disgusting overcooked salad! Why would you let me do that?
Next time maybe mention I shouldn't use soap in the recipe?
I'm guilty of this. For my pesto recipe I replaced pine nuts with peanuts, olive oil with sunflower oil, basil with spinach, cheese with nooch, but kept the salt, pepper, garlic and citric acid. It's not exactly pesto anymore at that point, but for a struggle meal it could be a lot worse.
Technically what you made very well could still be "Pesto", since the word refers to how it's prepared not what's in it (shares the same root as Pestle). The basil, pine nut, olive oil, and cheese recipe you were following would be Pesto alla Genovese
Ah, but did you then complain that the recipe was bad?
Seeing as I was frankensteining the recipe from several sources, I wouldn't even know where to complain if I had wanted to, so no.
Like it’s definitely a different thing, but it’s the same general concept, gonna have a wildly different flavor but fill the same kind of culinary niche.
Replacing carrot with kale in a freaking carrot cake is like replacing basil with potatoes.
I'm really loving the last one there. Somehow "shots" is their preferred unit of measure. Most cookies don't have any liquid ingredients, either, so milk is kind of a wild addition. Then they blame the recipe for being chunky, which I assume is due to the banana that they did a shit job of mashing. The cherry on top is that there is a rating out of five stars at the top (looks like they gave five stars?), but then they throw in a rating out of ten at the bottom. Should have given a thumbs up rating, but I assume the thumbs are busy in their ass.
Who the fuck substitutes mayo for heavy cream?
Hey, they're both thick and white. And eggs are dairy too!
Hey, they're both thick and white
If that's the bar, we should be glad it was mayonnaise!
I had a friend who wanted to make my No Bake cookies for her husband so I showed her the recipe and she said she had everything.
I show up to a game night and she’s making them but substituted the butter for the ‘can’t believe it’s not butter’ stuff. I told her it’s not the same thing and she didn’t believe me.
Instead of cookies she served us bowls of congealed cookies.
She tried blaming me but my friend knew better and called her out for not following the recipe.
I'm speechless. So they change the recipe and then they blame the recipe? WTF....
The weird part about these is sometimes the results are absolutely fire as long as you use a little common sense.
Its possible to bake an amazing chocolate cake by replacing the eggs and oil with mayonaise and a great Vanilla cake by replacing the milk and sugar with melted ice cream.
Replacing eggs and oil with mayonnaise?
Milk and sugar replaced with melted ice cream?
You're just substituting two things with one thing that is made almost entirely from those two things.
Like yes, eggs and oil are a great replacement for eggs and oil.
It still sounds insane at first until you think about it. "I'm baking a chocolate cake, fetch the mayonaise" Is not normal behavior.
Decided to give your “famous” crab cake recipe a try. Substituted double chocolate fudge brownies for the crab and was murdered by how bad it was. No crab to be found anywhere in the mess and now I have panic attack disorder. -15/10 Next time just say you don’t know what the fuck a crab cake is, GWYNETH.
The amount of dumbfucks in the 1990s who suggested I could remove the eggs from my cookies recipe and replace them with bananas and cider vinegar was insane. I get you are looking to reduce fats but why would a banana and acid do the same job as the egg?
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