360
top 49 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[-] SkaveRat@discuss.tchncs.de 110 points 1 week ago

why are you posting empty 4chan screenshots?

[-] FiskFisk33@startrek.website 8 points 1 week ago

what? It wasn't empty. There was, um, something about... hmm I don't remember.

[-] nutsack@lemmy.dbzer0.com 59 points 1 week ago

try burping and then saying "oh fuck yeah that's good" as you approach before you get too close. this way they know you're coming and they know what you'll smell like

[-] Ceruleum@lemmy.wtf 14 points 1 week ago

And if you can't burp, you can instead fart.

[-] yngmnwntr@lemmy.ml 8 points 1 week ago

I hate fartin and wastin' it, I'd rather burp and be tastin' it!

[-] Ceruleum@lemmy.wtf 2 points 1 week ago

With enough workarounds you can taste your farts as well.

[-] nutsack@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

while you rip you can let out a sigh and say "ugghhh god yea" so again they know What to expect

[-] Ceruleum@lemmy.wtf 2 points 1 week ago

Username checks out.

[-] Syd@lemm.ee 5 points 1 week ago

It's also cleverly putting the idea in their head that you smell good.

[-] Object@sh.itjust.works 56 points 1 week ago

I think the problem is that

Um

What was I talking about again?

[-] Hubi@feddit.org 48 points 1 week ago

That's some medieval ass logic

[-] lurch@sh.itjust.works 41 points 1 week ago

I have this too. It's when you move too silent. I just start conversations by saying DO NOT BE AFRAID with the voice in their head. Can recommend.

[-] Azzu@lemm.ee 41 points 1 week ago

What have we learned? Anon is boring and wearing soft shoes.

[-] festnt@sh.itjust.works 16 points 1 week ago

might also have a problem with walking normally (constantly crouching, making stealth higher)

[-] jabathekek@sopuli.xyz 1 points 1 week ago

oh shit, anon is the tiktok thot progenitor

[-] latenightnoir 34 points 1 week ago

Ooor, someone had to "survive" their family's bullshit and being unseen was the best way to do it. Then it became so ingrained in said someone's existential fingerprint, that they're now a ninja without even realising it.

[-] nesc@lemmy.cafe 33 points 1 week ago

You don't need some tragic family background to be soulless creature wearing human costume.

[-] zaphod@sopuli.xyz 19 points 1 week ago

Yeah, bullying at school works too.

[-] JustAnotherKay@lemmy.world 15 points 1 week ago

Yeah I'm like this and it's not really a trauma thing for me. I'm just autistic and ADHD which basically means I take advice too seriously and I have a bad habit of getting into someone's field of view or in their way by accident. As a result of being advised to be less visible every time I got in someone's view, I accidentally became invisible. It's something I've been working on lately actually and I've noticed I scare people less often since I started thinking about it

[-] Prime_Minister_Keyes@lemm.ee 3 points 1 week ago

And one day when we flee
From our sweet misery
And shed our human costumes then
Revealing somewhat smaller men
Go off to work and then back again

[-] latenightnoir 1 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

You don't need to assume that it isn't a tragic familial background, either. Or any other sort of trauma/condition which would push one to close off. Throwing the "soulless" label aroud willy-nilly is just an extension of abusing the "narcissist" moniker. It prohibits any nuance and facilitates unjustified suspicion.

Yes, there are sociopaths who can be considered soulless. But just because one is odd does not intrinsically mean one is soulless. There's a plethora of other potential reasons.

Plus, don't forget, oddity is in the eye of the beholder in the first place. My odd may be completely different than your odd.

[-] nesc@lemmy.cafe 3 points 1 week ago

Yeah trowing around soulless label is horrible abuse in a joke post with a screenshot from 4chan.

[-] 2910000@lemmy.world 21 points 1 week ago

A half dozen keychains has the same effect without being quite so odd

[-] DancingBear@midwest.social 5 points 1 week ago

Aye!!!! More cowbell!!!

[-] WeirdGoesPro@lemmy.dbzer0.com 20 points 1 week ago

I have the opposite problem—I’m a strong impression making motherfucker. Strangers consistently approach me to say “you look like [insert famous person].” Acquaintances tell me “I never forgot you.”

And yet, nobody keeps in touch without a lot of effort on my part. I wish I knew how to transition my “I remember you” power into an “I want to be closer to you” power.

[-] Object@sh.itjust.works 31 points 1 week ago

Give him his soul back you monster

Yeah, you're only allowed one soul.

[-] RBWells@lemmy.world 12 points 1 week ago

I am like this and do not understand it. Literally the other day a FedEx guy remembered me because he was my brother's friend, another guy said he remembered me from 2nd grade. Neither of them at all familiar to me, and this happens regularly. I could never be a spy. It's not looks, I'm average in looks. This is not a small town either.

[-] frog@feddit.uk 16 points 1 week ago

Approach where they can see you in their line of vision but not directly. Approach at a 45 degree angle.

[-] recentSloth43@lemmy.world 16 points 1 week ago

He should play basketball with that superpower

[-] SparrowHawk@feddit.it 7 points 1 week ago

Anon no basket

[-] Hikermick@lemmy.world 14 points 1 week ago

They should start wearing juggalo makeup

[-] Pyro@programming.dev 14 points 1 week ago
[-] YarrMatey@lemmy.dbzer0.com 10 points 1 week ago

Live SCP, image of anon is a cognitohazard.

[-] Banana@sh.itjust.works 10 points 1 week ago

Very sad when someone innocent gets caught in the range of a false hydra's song

[-] JohnDClay@sh.itjust.works 10 points 1 week ago

I like to say 'knock knock' to get someone's attention, seems to be a little less starting than a hand on the shoulder.

[-] sporkler@lemmy.world 10 points 1 week ago

IDK, since my soul was collected people seem to unconsciously avoid me, and eye contact that lasts for a second would seem long, if he can describe having a conversation I suspect it's something else.

[-] Gutek8134@lemmy.world 9 points 1 week ago

I also have weak presence, but I like joking about actually being a ninja

[-] AngryCommieKender@lemmy.world 6 points 1 week ago

I call it my 'stealth field,' because I can turn it off. It just defaults to on.

[-] phuntis@sopuli.xyz 7 points 1 week ago

bros a blank

[-] match@pawb.social 7 points 1 week ago

You can use this power to be an incredible hypnotist or subtly manipulate people

[-] FiskFisk33@startrek.website 6 points 1 week ago

OP is a high level rouge with a CHA dump stat.

[-] elvith@feddit.org 6 points 1 week ago

I can ~~see~~ read posts of dead people!

[-] emberinmoss@sh.itjust.works 5 points 1 week ago

You just need to wear something bright--doesn't have to happy bright though, could be like a bright green skull on your shirt or something, bright coloured shoes with black attire. Own that spooky vibe. Lean into it. Be proud of it. You're not soulless, just a spooky ghoul and spooky ghouls are great.

[-] blackluster117@sh.itjust.works 3 points 1 week ago

The Schwa Was Here

[-] OrderedChaos@lemmy.world 2 points 1 week ago

I can walk in making noise with my feet or humming and still scare people. I think op just works with people who are deeply engrossed in their thoughts.

this post was submitted on 29 Mar 2025
360 points (100.0% liked)

Greentext

5972 readers
987 users here now

This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS