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Billionaire Anti-Aging Zealot Shares Data on Son’s Erections (www.thedailybeast.com)
submitted 3 days ago by MolecularCactus1324@lemmy.world to c/nottheonion@lemmy.world
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[-] ThisIsMyLemmyLogin@lemmy.world 13 points 1 day ago

What a fucking weirdo.

[-] labbbb2@thelemmy.club 1 points 1 day ago

Apparently he is a narcissist

[-] sit@lemmy.dbzer0.com 9 points 1 day ago

He looks healthy enough to be a real snack for whoever gets to eat the rich

[-] Ceedoestrees@lemmy.world 3 points 1 day ago

Just not the dick. According to this article he gets weekly penis injections, but it doesn't say of what.

[-] _cryptagion@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 1 day ago

Yeah, that's a perfectly normal thing to do.

[-] AshMan85@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago

Fucking weirdos

[-] honeynut@lemm.ee 18 points 2 days ago

It's completely normal father-son bonding. Find a different slant.

[-] teft@lemmy.world 153 points 3 days ago

The dude gets weekly dick injections which he classifies as 9.5 out of 10 on a pain scale.

Weekly.

Dude is a fucking moron.

[-] prole 4 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

I truly hope that these people start getting massive organ failure and shit because of all of this experimental garbage they put into their bodies.

[-] kescusay@lemmy.world 80 points 3 days ago

9.5 out of 10. In his dick.

Has anyone asked him why he wants to live forever if that's what it takes?

[-] DharkStare@lemmy.world 67 points 3 days ago

"You get to live forever but in exchange you have to get incredibly painful injections in your dick on a daily basis."

Sounds like a cursed genie wish.

[-] franklin@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago

What's the quality of my life? Like 20s forever or do I still age?

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[-] probably2high@lemmy.world 9 points 2 days ago

It's like those showerthought ultimatums : You can choose to gain eternal life, but every day your dick is the subject of the worst pain you've ever felt.

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[-] jagged_circle@feddit.nl 21 points 2 days ago

On a related note, I was just searching fdroid for a signal app. I didn't find one, but I did find an app that tracks your Morning Wood

[-] antiquity2038@reddthat.com 25 points 2 days ago

Didn't think you were serious.

[-] MadBigote@lemmy.world 4 points 1 day ago

Lol and you're downloading it!

[-] jagged_circle@feddit.nl 10 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

encouraging collaboration and innovation

Yes, let's "collaborate" in regard to our morning wood.

"Hay bro, would you mind 'innovating' with my erection this morning? No homo"

[-] CrowAirbrush@lemmy.world 4 points 1 day ago

Dafuq kind of insight do i gain from it...

[-] antiquity2038@reddthat.com 5 points 1 day ago

I guess it might help if you're concerned about ED, since experiencing less (or no) morning woods can be a sign of physical ED.

[-] Hadriscus@lemm.ee 3 points 1 day ago

Really ? I don't think I ever experienced this regularly ever. I have otherwise no issues getting it up

[-] CrowAirbrush@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago

Huh, ED caused by depression...never knew those were linked.

Interesting info, thank you.

[-] MutilationWave@lemmy.world 1 points 1 day ago

And ED can be exacerbated by certain depression meds. There's nothing wrong with my dick. If my wife were to grab it, it would work just fine I just don't even think about sex every day and very rarely masturbate.

[-] CrowAirbrush@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago

I knew about meds messing with your sex drive, been through that myself.

[-] prole 2 points 1 day ago

I'd be shocked if they weren't linked.

[-] CrowAirbrush@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago

I never really read up on it, even though i should.

The wife's chronically depressed and i'm not doing much better either.

[-] jagged_circle@feddit.nl 12 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

Yep, thats the one

Edit: lol you're downloading it?

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[-] postmateDumbass@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago

Does it require a sensor? Do they wear a fleshlight to bed? Is it camera based?

So many questions.

Also, theDailyBeast reporting on morning wood is quality humor from the matrix.

[-] jagged_circle@feddit.nl 1 points 1 day ago

I'm sure it works like period trackers. You input the data manually

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[-] SonicBlue03@sh.itjust.works 101 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

These erections are rigged!

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[-] morgunkorn@discuss.tchncs.de 66 points 3 days ago

i saw him on two separate youtube channels: Magnus Midtbø (norwegian climber) and Will Tennyson (bodybuilding vlogger)

in both cases, they were invited by Bryan Johnson to his lair, going through his routine. it felt like a surreal cringe fest of zero social awareness. Bryan was permanently looking for some kind of validation, comparing his skills to his guest, or asking the various personal trainers / doctors if he beat some younger age category, etc.

everything he does can't be healthy and i wouldn't call what he does "living". he's bound to a 24h program where everything is planned down to the minute.

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this post was submitted on 25 Jan 2025
421 points (100.0% liked)

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