30
submitted 2 weeks ago by mjsaber to c/transgender

Trans woman in the states not interested in waiting to see what happens after this election.

[-] mjsaber 57 points 2 weeks ago

How do I request asylum in a country that doesn't want to erase trans people?

41
submitted 1 month ago by mjsaber to c/mtf

Looking for ideas of where to move next. Places in the US that are lgbt friendly, and preferably have good trans healthcare. I'll probably never be able to move to any of them, but it would be nice to pretend for a little while.

[-] mjsaber 26 points 1 month ago

I've gotten a disturbing number of messages on grindr from men that are hard core right wing, yet are on a gay dating app. The level of hate, ignorance, and cognitive dissonance is unprecedented. And it's all fueled by highly addictive apps, and pumped at unimaginable scales thanks to AI.

I hate to say it, but I think this really is the end.

[-] mjsaber 40 points 1 month ago

Also, at a high enough level (104 F), the proteins in your brain start to denature, which leads to death.

[-] mjsaber 20 points 1 month ago

I practiced in the shower and in the car when I did it - I wasn't out and didn't have many safe spaces.

Are you focusing on resonance at all? It's generally more important than pitch. Focus on raising your resonance, and pitch will follow.

Also, if anyone is interested in starting a discord to practice voice training, please invite me!

73
submitted 1 month ago by mjsaber to c/mtf

I'm so tired of the healthcare system. I work as a nurse for one of the largest and most reputable organizations in the US. And getting culturally competent care is ridiculous. There are only 2 providers in the entire organization who are willing to take trans patients, and I'm outside of their geographic area (never mind the fact I was given a referral by the trans specialty clinic when I explained I don't need transition services, just a doctor that knows the basics of lgbtq health).

I know people have it worse than me, but it's still bullshit I can't just call and make an appointment. This is already the third round of calls I've had to make just to get an appointment set up.

I think the worst part is I had a job in gender affirming care I was fired from (for daring to suggest we have signs for our clinic, or trans patients be able to call the regular line). I loved the work and the patients, and it felt so good to be able to help people like me get the care they need in a respectful and competent manner. But now I'm back to taking care of old, entitled, and almost exclusively white cis het patients. I hate being part of a system that perpetuates disparities, but I'm stuck because I can't find any way to provide this care without earning another degree.

Thanks for letting me vent.

[-] mjsaber 20 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

I'm a nurse. Does that count as "blue collar"? Because I absolutely need to shower after 12 hours in the hospital.

30
submitted 5 months ago by mjsaber to c/mtf

Not sure if this is the place to post, but I've moved a lot recently and there aren't really any queer folks where I live. I'm looking for some kind of discord or something to chat and vent and just feel a little less alone.

I'm pretty old and I've "completed" my transition, and I'm always happy to share my experiences or knowledge if people are interested.

And apologies if this isn't the right spot for this post.

[-] mjsaber 53 points 6 months ago

This is what I don't get. I'm a nurse, and since I (ostensibly) have people's lives in my hand, we are checked and double-checked, have to do continual education, and literally everything we do needs to be documented and audited.

And our goal is always to prevent harm to the patient. Why do people who can legally end someone's life not have the same, or much more strict, standards (I'm asking this rhetorically, I don't really want an answer).

It seems like adapting medical licensing and reporting requirements would help get us on the right track, or at the very least help hold police accountable.

[-] mjsaber 36 points 9 months ago

Have an appointment tomorrow. Don't know if it constitutes legal discrimination, but I'm almost tempted to bring it even if it's not a slam dunk. They care so much about reputation a lawsuit would hurt them more than I ever could.

[-] mjsaber 22 points 9 months ago

Thank you. Already had a meeting scheduled with a lawyer tomorrow.

I just wanted to do some good. I didn't even get a chance to pass off my patients.

168
submitted 9 months ago by mjsaber to c/mtf

Moved up to the "Big City" in October. Today I was fired by a woman with a smile on her face.

My biggest complaints were being isolated from my peers, not having enough work to do, and not receiving feedback on my work performance directly.

I was accused of working outside of scope, not being able to separate my personal feelings from work, and not responding to doctors in a timely fashion. No specific or documented instances of any of these accusations were provided to me.

So now I'm alone, in a way more expensive city, with about the same amount it cost to move here left in the bank.

I think I'm done with healthcare. As a trans person, working inside of it is fucking awful, especially in large hospital organizations. I don't think it helps I graduated from nursing school in 2020.

What now? This was my dream job, at an organization (I thought) had their shit together. It was a nightmare on the inside - no support, no community. Call staff couldn't "handle" trans patients, so we have to call a separate line that might have someone call you back.

I came up with so many ideas, ways to improve, best practices we aren't following. Patients getting dead named and misgendered in charts, at the pharmacy, to their face. Asleep in the OR during surgery.

I've never been more confused about a job ending. I literally said I would do anything, work overtime, adapt my style, learn 6 different specialties, anything I could to help.

They never even listened to me. Why did they bring me all this way just to ignore me?

The worst part, I think, is that I don't know if I will ever really trust another human the same way. I thought this was a safe place where I could talk openly about what was deficient, and how to alleviate that. But I did that, and they didn't want to hear it, and now I'm on my own again.

I really thought we could build something truly special. I guess I'm just disappointed I'll never get a chance to see what that could have been.

[-] mjsaber 21 points 9 months ago

Anyone. It isn't about my physical characteristics. I just want to help people and instead I just get ridiculed and critiqued. I'm tired of being alone and sad. My cat is the only reason I haven't killed myself, and I don't know how much longer he can hold that dam.

[-] mjsaber 21 points 9 months ago

As a trans girl, I get a lot of interest from other trans girls, so it checks out for me.

[-] mjsaber 28 points 10 months ago
[-] mjsaber 20 points 11 months ago

I'm working to set up connections to folks in Canada that will be willing to relocate LGBTQ folks across the border.

183
Grammar rule (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
submitted 11 months ago by mjsaber to c/196

Come correct or don't cum at all.

246
White sauce rule (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
submitted 1 year ago by mjsaber to c/196

I'd say about 100% of my woes could be solved by covering me in a creamy, white sauce.

27
submitted 1 year ago by mjsaber to c/transgender@lemmy.ml

I just got my dream job helping run a trans healthcare program, and I'm looking for input from the community on on what would make you feel more comfortable or engaged with your medical provider. We provide everything from HRT to surgery to non-trans medical care. My goal is to have the happiest, healthiest patients in the country!

48
submitted 1 year ago by mjsaber to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml
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mjsaber

joined 1 year ago