What is something you wish cis people understood? (self.trans)

submitted 9 months ago by onevia to c/trans

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Personally, for me it's the idea that just because you don't experience something (dysphoria, or being a gender other than what society expects of you) that doesn't mean those experiences aren't valid.

I get sooo tired of the response "I just don't understand! I love being my AGAB! Why can't you just get over it?"

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[-] cowboycrustation 9 points 9 months ago

I've heard this exact same phrasing in response to my being ADHD. Funny how that works with people.

[-] onevia 5 points 9 months ago

Same, lol. I think it boils down to yes, a lot of people can relate to aspects of being trans or even ADHD, but there is a certain threshold where action needs to be taken.

Most people can relate to lack of motivation or ability to focus from time to time, but when I don't take my ADHD meds, that is me all the time regardless of circumstances. I needed help in managing the ADHD.

Most people can relate to enjoying hobbies or mannerisms or expression that are socially tagged as of a different gender, but being trans means that you inherently are of another gender and have a need to express differently than society expects.

It's a deeper level for both situations and just because a cis person (or neurotypical person) can relate to the surface level in some way does not invalidate the deeper feelings and experiences of another.

That probably is why I got so angry when my step mom said "well, why can't you just be a feminine guy, isn't that enough?"

No, because I am not a man. It has nothing to do with femininity and everything to do with my identity. Exploring my feminine side is how I find my authentic self.

[-] cowboycrustation 1 points 9 months ago

Well put.

this post was submitted on 11 Mar 2024

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