[-] jjjalljs@ttrpg.network 1 points 3 hours ago

It's fine. Could be better. Could be a lot worse.

[-] jjjalljs@ttrpg.network 4 points 3 hours ago

I mean if you want to keep running bleed against a boss immune to bleed go ahead, but I'll probably switch to an occult infusion.

[-] jjjalljs@ttrpg.network 16 points 20 hours ago

And yet when someone's like "the GOP is an existential threat and we should treat them accordingly" it's all "you're being alarmist" and "murder is a crime"

I hope every member of the GOP chokes to death alone and removed from everything they ever loved.

[-] jjjalljs@ttrpg.network 15 points 20 hours ago

I'm thinking trump and the Republican party are really bad, like cruel and stupid bad, and maybe we shouldn't let them give orders anymore.

[-] jjjalljs@ttrpg.network 3 points 1 day ago

Some of this behavior seems self destructive.

I knew a woman who would be like "I have too many matches it's overwhelming". I'd be like "ok well stop swiping and clear out what you have." She'd be like "no, swiping is fun." Well, ok, but you're not making progress towards your stated goal, and you're wasting the other people's time.

[-] jjjalljs@ttrpg.network 1 points 1 day ago

I just don't think spending 2 weeks texting without meeting is going to give useful, accurate, information. The chemistry you're measuring there isn't what you'll have in real life.

A couple dinners before you find out they’re not what you thought? The same is achieved with just talking for a couple weeks

Strong disagreement here. The same is not achieved by texting and fundamentally cannot be achieved. There is too much stuff in body language, voice, and such that you're just not going to reveal over text. Plus other stuff like seeing how they interact with other people. Are they rude to the bartender? Do they road rage? There are whole worlds of information you can't get without spending time with someone in person.

[-] jjjalljs@ttrpg.network 2 points 1 day ago

We have different takes about "pen pals". I don't want to message someone for weeks before meeting up. I do like

  • initial tailored message (eg: "Your profile says you love Kelly Link! Did you read her new novel? I really enjoyed it")
  • if they respond badly, exit (eg: "no")
  • one or two responses (eg: if they say "No! I've only read her short stories! Was it good?" then we can have a brief conversation about it)
  • clear any dealbreakers (eg: if i had a kid, i'd ask something like "Just wanted to make sure you saw the thing on my blurb about my kid. Are you cool with dating a single parent?")
  • If that all goes well, ask something like "Do you want to have a date and see if we get along in person?"

That's it. All done. Meeting up for a drink is low cost and low risk, but very information dense. I can get a better feel for if I want to invest in them after an hour in person than I can with a week of texting.

This is written from the perspective of a man who doesn't date men. I can't speak authoritatively about other experiences, but second hand none of my women friends have enjoyed prolonged texting without meeting.

[-] jjjalljs@ttrpg.network 1 points 1 day ago

Maybe sometimes. Most modern apps you can only message if you've both signaled interest, so if you're getting messages from people you're not attracted to I'd ask why you swiped on them in the first place.

Secondly, if you get a message and aren't interested, it's better to just unmatch. If you don't have time to respond fully now, then just don't say anything. If you send a half-ass response, you look kind of bad and the other person might bail. Who wants to talk to someone who, based on all available evidence in this scenario, can't hold a conversation? The main thing on these app is trying to make yourself look good. Making yourself look like someone who can't compose a sentence isn't doing yourself any favors.

[-] jjjalljs@ttrpg.network 6 points 1 day ago

Match group 100% should be broken up.

I think a lot of people, of all genders, are surprisingly bad at the skills needed to use a dating app successfully. People dead end conversations and then are like "why aren't I having fun conversations?"

Like, a profile says "I love SomeBand". You write "hey! SomeBand is my favorite. Did you see their new music video? I don't know how they got those cats to act!" And then respond with "no", end of message. I'm just like my friend, that is not how you use this tool. What do you think is going to happen next?

But yeah, women refusing to take initiative probably isn't helping. But the roots of that are pretty deep in our sexist society, and I don't see that changing any time soon.

[-] jjjalljs@ttrpg.network 8 points 1 day ago

I think the dating app model that's currently popular kind of can't work well for users. They're all set up so they benefit from users paying a subscription for a long time, but users want to find a match and get out. Those are contradictory.

I think a match making model would be better. Pay a single fee and they try to set you up with someone. They already got your money so their incentive would be to set you up happily so they don't have to work on you anymore. But users don't want to pay for anything, so we'll continue having garbage and garbage incentives.

[-] jjjalljs@ttrpg.network 3 points 1 day ago

I think feeld recently was revealed to have all of their information and apis public. Like anyone could find any message and photos, and do CRUD operations on them.

https://fortbridge.co.uk/research/feeld-dating-app-nudes-data-publicly-available/

Also the app kind of sucks, at least as a free user. It does the same bullshit as all the others where it doesn't actually connect you with people. And some classes of users (eg: women) get bombarded with low quality content while others get nothing.

Hinge also kind of sucks for the same capitalism reasons, but it's better than the others I tried.

[-] jjjalljs@ttrpg.network 5 points 1 day ago

Return to office mandates are some combination of management failure, class warfare, and maybe some real estate valuation nonsense. There's no good reason for it.

I'd really like people to unionize so they can say "no" as a unified group.

15
submitted 4 months ago by jjjalljs@ttrpg.network to c/dcss@lemmy.world

Not sure if this community is dead, but here we are!

I kind of stopped playing new versions around .28 because I really disliked the opportunity attacks mechanism, but I thought I'd give .32 a try. The new shapeshifter things look cool, but in fussing with it a bit it's harder than I expected.

But now the tournament is live! Who's playing?

https://crawl.develz.org/tournament/0.32/

I currently have one win with ye olde MiBe. Got lucky with good armor early on, and then cruised to a 3 rune (shoals + snake + vaults) win.

There was one dicey moment in the lungs where I went around the corner to reveal 4 orbs of fire, some draconians, and a lightning golem all waiting for me. Hasted + Fog'd my way the hell out there.

7

I tried it a bit with my reaper in pve and it seemed okay, but I wasn't doing anything challenging that really put it to the test. I haven't tried the others classes yet.

13
submitted 5 months ago by jjjalljs@ttrpg.network to c/Polyamory@kbin.run

Currently, I'm polite to friendly with all of them. No outstanding conflicts. It's sometimes literal kitchen table poly with one, and the others I only see at like parties and such.

Some years ago I had two partners that absolutely did not get along with each other, and that was rough. Recently I was able to do a dinner with 3 partners and everyone had a good time.

I try not to make a big deal about folks meeting. I try to model after meeting your friend's friends.

33
submitted 5 months ago by jjjalljs@ttrpg.network to c/Polyamory@kbin.run

For me there's a bit of a network effect where the polycule sprawls out into the distance. Partners have partners who have partners.

But for disconnected folks, it's mostly been tinder (yuck), and a local meetup.

(Also this might be the first post? That or nothing federated yet)

8

I'm looking for players for a weekly game of Fate. I'm thinking something like a mix of Shadowrun and World of Darkness, where the players are vigilantes looking to make the world better. It would start (and maybe stay) at the street level, rather than global or cosmic.

I've been playing and running games for 20+ years.

LGBT friendly. New players okay. Unreliable players less so.

Message me if you're interested. Include a blurb about yourself, your experience with games, with fate specifically, and a joke of your choosing.

63

Like I saw one that was titled "I wonder why rule" and had a picture about overpaid CEOs or something.

Why "rule"? What's the origin of this format?

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jjjalljs

joined 2 years ago