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submitted 5 months ago by Caesium@lemmy.world to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

Sorry for the weird question, don't know how else to word it. Basically I'm job hunting and I'm realizing the dress code is gonna be an obstacle.

I exclusively wear skirts and dresses. Not for a religion -- I'm agnostic -- but for sensory reasons. I hate pants. I hate how they feel on my legs and I haven't worn them in almost 10 years now. I understand the need to wear pants for some jobs because they're ultimately safer than a flowy skirt, but one of the jobs I've applied to is a bank. I doubt the building is a skirt deathtrap behind the scenes.

Honestly the idea of having to wear pants is so upsetting I'm breaking down over it. It's so stupid but after I finally found a way to feel comfortable when I started wearing skirts, I don't think I can go back even if the job is better than my current one.

My only idea is to get some kind of doctors note but even that seems unlikely. Hoping for other ideas here.

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[-] communism@lemmy.ml 46 points 5 months ago

Skirts are fairly common formalwear, at least for women. Are you a man? If not, I think any office job, receptionist job, etc, would be fine with you wearing a skirt. I imagine it'd only be some forms of manual labour where a skirt would get in the way.

Why would a bank make you not wear a skirt?

[-] Double_A@discuss.tchncs.de 42 points 5 months ago

What kind of skirts are we talking about? Because "business formal" for women typically includes skirts.

[-] teawrecks@sopuli.xyz 5 points 5 months ago

Up until the 80s-90s, they were virtually mandatory for women. Probably still are in many countries.

[-] digdilem@lemmy.ml 32 points 5 months ago

How can I wear a skirt at work

Wear skirt. Go to work.

I don't know what I'm missing here. Unless there's a safety reason to the job or a mandatory uniform, why would anyone care? Maybe you're in a particularly repressive country and I don't understand the nature of the problem, or why religion comes into it.

[-] disregardable@lemmy.zip 15 points 5 months ago

if a job requires pants, it's not a suitable job for you.

[-] 64bithero@lemmy.world 13 points 5 months ago

If it’s an office job i doubt there will be a pants requirement. Just having clothes on …

[-] IWW4@lemmy.zip 12 points 5 months ago

Women wear skirts all the time where I work. No one really cares.

[-] bjoern_tantau@swg-empire.de 12 points 5 months ago

I don't quite get how religion plays into this but I assume you are a man and are afraid of what others might think of you if you wear a skirt instead of pants.

How about a kilt? They are somewhat accepted as male skirts.

[-] zeus@shitpost.poridge.club 11 points 5 months ago

@Caesium@lemmy.world
Say you are religious. Who cares. This lie doesn't hurt anyone.

[-] RBWells@lemmy.world 10 points 5 months ago

Are you a lady? I work in an office at a sports company (so sporty casual is common) and there are several women here who wear dresses and skirts not pants, several more who switch back & forth. Not me - pants feel much more secure to me - but it's nothing anyone really notices.

A man wearing skirts we would notice for awhile, not care but notice; if you are customer facing then you might encounter that surprise over and over, if not, I don't think it will be a big deal.

[-] SpongyAneurysm@feddit.org 8 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago)

Might be helpful to know your gender, location (like country) and do you have autism by chance?

The first part is to taylor (lol) suggestions to you. The second part is out of curiosity and because that might be helpful to classify it as a medical necessity.

[-] Appoxo@lemmy.dbzer0.com 8 points 5 months ago

Come to the interview and ask if it's a problem.
I am pretty sure pencil skirts (if I reference the correct clothing) arent that uncommon in office jobs.
Just keep it to professional office attire. 🤷

[-] JennaR8r@lemmy.dbzer0.com 6 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago)

If you've been comfortably wearing skirts & dresses for 10 years, wouldn't you rrealize that skirts & dresses are perfectly acceptable attire in a bank? And if you're a man who's comfortably been wearing skirts & dresses for 10 years, how is this upcoming bank interview suddenly an obstacle? Is this your first job interview in 10 years? Here are some business-appropriate kilts: https://21stcenturykilts.com/kilts

[-] otp@sh.itjust.works 6 points 5 months ago

Are you a man? Call it a kilt.

[-] Sandouq_Dyatha@lemmy.ml 6 points 5 months ago

if you're leaving out a part of being an AMAB or a man or a trans woman who is hiding, there's many traditional clothes in the world that can satisfy that, most common is probably the arab thoub

[-] eldavi@lemmy.ml 6 points 5 months ago

have you tried different fabrics or fineness? some of them don't feel like you're wearing anything at all.

[-] 64bithero@lemmy.world 6 points 5 months ago
[-] eldavi@lemmy.ml 5 points 5 months ago

someone gifted me silk pants a while ago and that's when i finally understood flanders. lol

[-] DJKJuicy@sh.itjust.works 5 points 5 months ago

I am a little confused by this, maybe I just have USA brain.

I've worked office jobs for over 30 years now. No employer I've ever worked for would forbid women from wearing skirts to the office.

If there's more to the story and you're dealing with gender issues then add that information.

[-] Battle_Masker 3 points 5 months ago

Have you tried explaining to your boss the issues that pants bring you? You could word it in a way that allows you to bring up the American Disabilities Act (or whatever your country's corresponding law is, should one exist). If they still say no, ask for it in writing and tell them you'll have a lawyer look it over

[-] duub@lemmy.ml 2 points 5 months ago

Maybe in your region they are not as open minded as other places and you need to be a pioneer, my only tip is get references of other people pionering, take as much courage as you can and fight for your rights!

[-] azimir@lemmy.ml 1 points 5 months ago

Even a toga is an option. It's not "normal" most places, but if you wear reasonably covering clothing and get your work done anyone worth working for won't really care.

[-] lorty@lemmy.ml 1 points 5 months ago

Work from home or check the company's dress code before applying. But as most have said: if your presented gender matches the "expected" one for wearing skirts, you'll never face problems doing so, unless you want to work at a factory or something.

[-] HobbitFoot@thelemmy.club 1 points 5 months ago

It depends on what job it is. I don't see a bank having a problem with it unless they have a uniform. If you were doing any field or machine work, I could see a safety issue.

this post was submitted on 25 Mar 2026
52 points (100.0% liked)

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