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submitted 2 months ago by dandelion to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

Might help also to describe what you think feminism is, since it's one of those terms that is overloaded.

I once had a physical therapist tell me she wasn't a feminist because she thought women couldn't be as physically capable as men when serving as soldiers, and seemed to believe feminism requires treating women exactly like men.

I told her I was a feminist because I believe in equal rights for men and women, an idea she did not seem so opposed to.

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[-] nutbutter@discuss.tchncs.de 47 points 2 months ago

I am a feminist.

Feminism means all genders should be treated equal, but that does not mean men should also get paid menstrual leaves at their job. Equal rights, yes. Everyone should be treated fairly.

[-] neon_nova@lemmy.dbzer0.com 61 points 2 months ago

Defining it as paid menstrual leave is kind of the problem. Hear me out.

Women should be able to take paid leaves from work to deal with menstrual problems, but it shouldn’t stop there. All people should be able to take leave from work when they need it.

So, if it is redefined as paid leave, then it equalizes the field.

[-] dandelion 19 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

I think the "when they need it" part is where the feminism becomes relevant - there is a history of women (and men) being denied leave when they need it for sexist / patriarchal reasons (e.g. men are generally not given paternity leave, women might not be allowed to take leave due to menstruation).

The scope of acceptable reasons to take leave is what is debated and where feminism has pushed for paid leave for reasons previously denied to both men and women.

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[-] DavidDoesLemmy@aussie.zone 35 points 2 months ago

I don't believe in an -ism. I believe in equal rights. I think the name feminism does more harm than good.

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[-] IAmNorRealTakeYourMeds@lemmy.world 33 points 2 months ago

feminist as in "tear down unjust hierarchies", and definitely not feminist as in "girlboss yay we need more ladies oppressors"

[-] Noobnarski@lemmy.world 15 points 2 months ago

Exactly, also this "all men are bad and monsters" has to stop. This is not how you get the good men to help you stop and punish the bad men.

But yeah, fuck the patriarchy, women should have just as many rights and freedoms as men do, in theory and in practice.

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[-] Diva@lemmy.ml 32 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

I'm a feminist, opposed to any unjust hierarchy really. One of the things that set me off at a young age was how the US never passed the equal rights amendment.

Also in my home country the women's liberation movement was tied up with the communist movement which also is why I have a lot of the politics that I do

[-] monovergent@lemmy.ml 29 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

There are various schools of feminism, some of which have conflicting opinions. But the common feminist standpoints, like equal rights, seem to be just common sense for me, especially in this day and age. I'm not sure where the requirement for equal physical ability fits into the equation.

At least for me, going out and saying that you are feminist carries a sort of special connotation, and since I haven't participated in any explicitly activist events related to feminism, I wouldn't readily emblazon myself with the feminist label even though I stand by those ideas.

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[-] QueenHawlSera@sh.itjust.works 29 points 2 months ago

I consider myself egalitarian

I feel like the term Feminist gives too much of an impression that I tolerate or encourage misandry, which I certainly do not. That and if you look at feminist groups throughout history TERFs have been the norm, not the exception.

Egalitarian, because sexism cannot be tolerated no matter which direction it's facing.

[-] Cowbee@lemmy.ml 28 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Yes.

Down with the liars who are talking of freedom and equality for all, while there is an oppressed sex, while there are oppressor classes, while there is private ownership of capital, of shares, while there are the well-fed with their surplus of bread who keep the hungry in bondage. Not freedom for all, not equality for all, but a fight against the oppressors and exploiters!

– Vladimir Lenin, Soviet Power and the Status of Women

[-] CrabAndBroom@lemmy.ml 18 points 2 months ago

Comrades, there is no true social revolution without the liberation of women. May my eyes never see and my feet never take me to a society where half the people are held in silence. I hear the roar of women's silence. I sense the rumble of their storm and feel the fury of their revolt.

  • Thomas Sankara
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[-] Nemo@slrpnk.net 23 points 2 months ago

Yes, my whole life. It's how I was raised, but now that I'm an adult, it's also what I choose for myself and how I'm raising my own children.

Feminism is the radical idea that a person's worth, dignity, rights, and social status are not and ought not to be determined by their genitals.

[-] hactar42@lemmy.ml 21 points 2 months ago

As a CIS male I consider myself a feminist because I recognize that women continue to face systemic challenges that demand more than just abstract ideals of equality. To me, feminism goes beyond egalitarianism. It’s not just about treating everyone the same, it’s about recognizing the different challenges people face and working to change the systems that create and sustain those imbalances.

I was raised by my mom and 3 sisters, and that gave me a front-row seat to the everyday injustices women face. Everything from subtle slights to overt discrimination to being victim of abuse. It wasn’t theory for me, it was lived experience, just one degree removed. I've seen the strength and resilience of the women in my life, and I’ve also seen what they’ve had to push through simply because of their gender.

Now, as a father with a daughter, I feel an even deeper responsibility to be part of the shift. I don’t just want her to grow up in a world that pays lip service to “equality”. I want her to live in one where she’s safe, respected, and empowered. That means doing more than being “not sexist.” It means actively pushing back against the structures and behaviors (the patriarchy) that holds women back.

I have zero tolerance for toxic masculinity and so-called “alpha male” attitudes that promote dominance, entitlement, and emotional repression. That culture hurts everyone, but it especially harms women by normalizing control and aggression.

I want my daughter and every woman to see examples of men who are allies, not bystanders. Feminism is a promise: to show up, to speak out (or more often shut up), and to help dismantle barriers so that every person, regardless of gender, can thrive without restriction or fear.

[-] SorteKanin@feddit.dk 20 points 2 months ago

I prefer the term egalitarian or something to that effect. I definitely fall under the definition of a feminist, but I think it's sort of ironic that a term for equality has an inherent bias for women in the word itself, even if it is not the intended meaning.

I think the word itself has actually harmed the movement significantly. Turns out the words we use matter a lot. So again, I prefer a more neutral sounding term, like egalitarianism or equal rights.

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[-] MrsDoyle@sh.itjust.works 20 points 2 months ago

I like the Rebecca West quote: "I myself have never been able to find out precisely what feminism is: I only know that people call me a feminist whenever I express sentiments that differentiate me from a doormat."

[-] DomeGuy@lemmy.world 17 points 2 months ago

Of course I'm a feminist. It's one of those sublime categories like "alive" or "pregnant" that has only two possible states.

  1. Feminist
  2. Sexist pig.
[-] npdean@lemmy.today 10 points 2 months ago

This is the basic problem with how feminism is promoted. If you don’t agree with our views, you are a sexist pig.

This is not a good way to make reluctant people to accept your ideas. It pushes them even further into opposition.

[-] Nemo@slrpnk.net 12 points 2 months ago

If a person can't accept the basic premise that woman are equal to men, they're sexist by definition. This isn't the fault of "how feminism is promoted".

[-] npdean@lemmy.today 11 points 2 months ago

It is. Most people associate feminism with promoting women and not equality. Most people don’t look up the definition in a dictionary

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[-] Wahots@pawb.social 17 points 2 months ago

JK Rowling and the other TERFs have kinda ruined that term just like the american right soiled the flag.

I prefer "egalitarian" at this point, less loaded, and gender inclusive. I'm one of those radicals where I want non-traditional families, no gender roles, and all the vanilla straight stuff to all exist side by side in harmony.

Also, women's clothes needs real pockets. And men need cuter clothes like shortalls. That's a world I want to be a part of :)


The one thing I'm not egalitarian about- straight men need to be taught to pee sitting down, or at least lift the seat, damn. I know it's not all of you, but there are a couple of animals out there that need help. :p

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[-] ada 17 points 2 months ago

Feminist as fuck!

Feminism is the fight for equality, with a particular focus on the needs of women and folk perceived as women. Men are included in feminism, but indirectly, in that improving equality for women necessarily requires addressing systems, norms and issues that negatively impact men as well.

Sure, it's easy to say that you're "egalitarian" or believe in "equality for all", but those sound bites, whilst heading off the anti feminist folk, completely fail to address the fact that inequality is not equally spread between men and women. When everything else is equal, women still deal with more inequality than men, and feminism is exists because of that fact

[-] dandelion 11 points 2 months ago

When everything else is equal, women still deal with more inequality than men, and feminism is exists because of that fact

this is such a succinct and eloquent point about why "feminism" is focused on women at all ... this point seems lost on so many men, who seem to think "equality" demands we ignore the way inequality and power is distributed, as if the only approach to the situation is a kind of gender-blindness, and anything else is hypocrisy

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[-] JackbyDev@programming.dev 16 points 2 months ago

I am a feminist because I believe men and women should have equal rights. I think a lot of people fell for the propaganda that feminism is about women over men or something. The thing a lot of men fail to realize is that "the patriarchy" hurts them too. A lot of the things you see men complain about like being told to "man up" or not being able to express their feelings without being mocked are 100% a side effect of patriarchy.

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[-] Sunsofold@lemmings.world 15 points 2 months ago

I call myself egalitarian. It distinctly means what you mean by feminist without being so readily confused with what she means by feminist.

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[-] hoagecko@sh.itjust.works 14 points 2 months ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

(This comment uses translation software.)

Yes. I am a feminist, though I am skeptical.

Some feminists argue(Article in Japanese) that the gender equality brought about by feminism also liberates men from the suffering unique to them.

I take a similar stance, believing that the 'gender equality' brought about by male feminism, which seeks happiness for men, also liberates women from the suffering unique to them. In some ways, I am a reactionary feminist.

Previously, I was a male feminist with old-fashioned thinking, striving to eliminate only women's suffering, not men's.

However, I changed my mind after the Japanese government, where I live, adopted a policy of allocating "female admission quotas" at prestigious universities, including national universities, as part of its affirmative action program, modeled on America's racial admission quotas.

Even back when I supported traditional feminism, I was critical of the current state of university education in Japan, where there are public women's universities but no public men's universities. I also believe that expanding these quotas to general universities would violate the Constitution, which proclaims gender equality. I cannot trust traditional Japanese feminism, which supports the unconstitutional status quo, and that is why I have become the skeptical feminist I mentioned earlier.

[-] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 14 points 2 months ago

Yeah, specifically I'm fairly third wave in that I've been convinced of the value of an intersectional perspective, am pro modern sexual liberation (including the freedom to not want it), and generally am more aligned with the feminist critiques of the second wave. Furthermore I find a lot of the fourth wave to a shitshow, though considering the concept of the fourth wave is not based on academic ideas or coherent demands, but rather the idea that social media changed feminist discourse so radically as to constitute a change to a different wave.

Feminism has always had multiple sides, and like most liberatory movements it has people who are cringe, who are counterproductively hostile, and who generally suck. It will try things that don't work or push things in bad directions. Also college students and young people will do it in ways that look terrible. But feminist theory is also insightful texts that challenge cultural biases. And in a time where rights such as abortion are under attack and government officials are expressing their opposition to women's suffrage, the principle of equality and fundamental rights remains even if it looks different now from when our grandmothers and great grandmothers were fighting for the right for a bank account.

[-] daggermoon@lemmy.world 13 points 2 months ago

The thing about feminism is it benifits everybody. Men are a victim of the patriarchy as are women. I believe feminism is necessary to create a better world for everybody.

[-] hoshikarakitaridia@lemmy.world 12 points 2 months ago

I am not a feminist.

Feminism has a variety of different flavors with sets of specific ideals that are not a priority in my view, however the basic idea of equal rights is definitely important to me. The more I think about it, the less I feel I know what I'm talking about which is also why I don't wanna signify I have strong foundational knowledge on this topic. "Equality" is kind of baseline and not what you expect most kinds of feminism to expand to.

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[-] Tartas1995@discuss.tchncs.de 12 points 2 months ago

I would call myself a feminist because I believe in equality. You know, fuck sexism.

[-] HiddenLayer555@lemmy.ml 12 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

If feminist just means I think women deserve the exact same rights as men, and same with any other gender, then yes I'm a feminist.

If feminist means a woman advocate who strives to push more female perspectives in a world dominated by male ones, well I'm a cis man so by definition I can't do that. If I want to support that, and I do, the best thing I can do is stop talking and listen.

[-] Azzu@lemmy.dbzer0.com 10 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

I think it's a fundamental failure of feminism/people to make men think that they don't deserve a voice, even in support of women.

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[-] HuntressHimbo@lemmy.zip 12 points 2 months ago

I'm a feminist and a men's liberation kinda guy. Feminism is necessary and useful as theory and as a movement. It benefits both men and women

[-] brygphilomena@lemmy.dbzer0.com 12 points 2 months ago

I think I'm more egalitarian. But this is largely dependent on what you mean by feminism.

I believe all women should have total agency over themselves. I believe they deserve equal pay, treatment, and rights. I believe them when they discuss their issues and the prevalence of sexual assault and abuse.

I also believe that there are structures in our society that unfairly put them above men. For instance, in child care and criminal sentencing. Women tend to get the benefit of doubt that they are the better parent and that the relationship between a child and a mother is generally more important than that of a child and father. Women also, in general, get lighter sentences for the same crime.

I believe that we should be more equal in the value we place on the relationship between a child and it's father. Raising the importance of how we as a society view that relationship rather than bringing down the importance of the mothers relationship.

I also believe we should lighten the sentences of men to be more in line with women's sentencing. Although that largely falls in line with my personal opinion that criminal sentencing in this country is far, far too harsh.

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[-] chobeat@lemmy.ml 12 points 2 months ago

I'm not, because I do nothing actively in feminist political spaces. I believe opinions count nothing and don't change the world, so I don't want to be bundled up with the plenty of people who use it as a label for virtue signaling while not actually putting the effort in.

[-] UpperBroccoli 11 points 2 months ago

I believe in equal rights and opportunities for all, be they man, woman, in between or none of the above.

But saying (and perhaps believing) one is a feminist and actually acting like one are often two different pairs of shoes. We all are confronted with so much discrimination, with so much bias, with so much misogyny, it takes active labour to actually behave like a feminist, because no matter how you think about yourself, at some point and to some degree, all that shit we get confronted with every day will rub off on us, and we have to understand that and constantly check ourselves so that it does not influence us in our thought patterns. Constant mental garbage collection, if you want.

That is true for all kinds of discrimination, no matter what it is based on.

[-] klemptor@startrek.website 10 points 2 months ago

I am a staunch second-wave feminist. I believe in equal rights and equal respect for men and women and everyone else who doesn't fit into that binary, and that all should be able to work toward the life that suits them best without worrying about traditional gender roles.

It makes me sad to see women who are quick to say they're not a feminist, because they certainly benefit from feminism and I think they'd be rightly enraged if that went away. If they lost the right to vote, to have a bank account or own a home, to pursue whatever education interests them and work in that field, to choose whether/when/how to have children (RIP Roe v Wade), etc. I think a lot of women take a lot of these things for granted, but they exist because of feminism.

Sadly, I think the term 'feminism' has been successfully demonized in online spaces, to the point that many think it's the same as feminazi. In part this is because the most awful and vocal part of any movement draws a lot of negative attention, and subsequently those who are against equality for women can use feminazis as a boogeyman to denigrate the feminist movement.

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[-] AlHouthi4President@lemmy.ml 10 points 2 months ago

My politics are death to america and death to israel. Free Palestine and free the planet from US empire and centuries of European colonial domination.

Feminists have not done much materially on that front lets be honest.

Throwback to big name feminist Judith Butler on October 13 2023:

spoiler

In fact, I do condemn without qualification the violence committed by Hamas. This was a terrifying and revolting massacre. That was my primary reaction, and it endures.

...

There are those who do use the history of Israeli violence in the region to exonerate Hamas, but they use a corrupt form of moral reasoning to accomplish that goal. Let’s be clear, Israeli violence against Palestinians is overwhelming: relentless bombing, the killing of people of every age in their homes and on the streets, torture in their prisons, techniques of starvation in Gaza and the dispossession of homes. And this violence, in its many forms, is waged against a people who are subject to apartheid rules, colonial rule and statelessness. When, however, the Harvard Palestine Solidarity Committee issues a statement claiming that ‘the apartheid regime is the only one to blame’ for the deadly attacks by Hamas on Israeli targets, it makes an error. It is wrong to apportion responsibility in that way, and nothing should exonerate Hamas from responsibility for the hideous killings they have perpetrated.


Judith was not the only big name feminist to hold such views following the magnificent al Aqsa Flood Operation.

I would say that the web of NED/USAID NGO's that represent the face of feminism today has been a very effective tool of empire. I dont want women CEOs and women drone pilots and women iof soldiers and women politicians in puppet governments. I am a woman who wants the end of colonial occupation and superexploitation.

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[-] hakase@lemmy.zip 10 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Lots of good comments here pointing out problems with feminism, but one that I think hasn't been mentioned enough in this thread that's also directly relevant to the OP is the harmful idea that "if you believe in gender equality, then you're a feminist by definition".

While the term "feminist" does signify a person who, at least ostensibly, is in favor of equal rights among genders, using that term also, necessarily, implies belief in the core dogma that is inseparable from the term itself (patriarchy theory, etc.). This creates a false dichotomy in which people feel that in order to support equal rights they must also buy into feminist dogma, and that's not at all the case.

Luckily, though, feminism doesn't have a monopoly on gender equality, and it's important to let people know that fact, both because of how incredibly misleading "feminism just means gender equality" is and because there are more useful, more egalitarian frameworks through which to view the push for equality.

[-] Cowbee@lemmy.ml 10 points 2 months ago

No. This is the same argument as the "All Lives Matter" crowd using this as a cudgel against the "Black Lives Matter" movement. Women and gender non-conforming people are the ones most oppressed by the current system. Men also stand to gain from erasing it, but erasing the real unequal struggle does real harm.

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this post was submitted on 14 Aug 2025
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