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submitted 1 day ago by CheeseToastie@lazysoci.al to c/lgbtq_plus
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[-] NickwithaC@lemmy.world 1 points 23 minutes ago

Fully!

When I was 17 and trying to be discreet my mum slowly worked it out of me. When I was 18 and learned what asexuality was and broke it to my parents my dad read up about it to understand it more.

When my boyfriend and I first started getting serious and he'd spend the odd weekend here, my mum would occasionally ask "when are we seeing [his name] again?"

She eventually succumbed to Alzheimer's, but she never lost her loving nature. She was the salt of the earth - a role model for kindness and compassion who I was lucky to be raised by. I wish that for everyone.

[-] accideath@lemmy.world 1 points 23 minutes ago

Very. Am lucky in that regard. Am pan and my partner is trans. No big deal. Also my great uncle came out as gay a few years ago and even most of the family in his generation (he’s in his 60s now) are supportive. And recently my teenage sibling came out as trans and our parents are doing their best to get them the resources they need.

[-] Zero22xx 3 points 6 hours ago

I have no idea what my father's beliefs are or who he even really is but he doesn't strike me as right wing. My mother is someone who would be accepting of other people but I'm not convinced that this acceptance would extent to me. My two older sisters who practically raised me would probably be accepting but still I'm scared of rejection in that regard.

Over all, if I had to break the news that I'm non-binary, first of all I'd probably have a bit of explaining to do of what non-binary even is in the first place. And I think they'd be accepting to my face but there would lots of phone calls and gossiping behind my back.

[-] CheeseToastie@lazysoci.al 2 points 1 hour ago

Yep, and that's difficult. Once you tell them you lose control of the information

[-] Zero22xx 2 points 1 hour ago

lose control of the information

Honestly that is an amazing way of putting it. And I think that pretty accurately describes how I feel about the big 'coming out' event. I would like people to know for the sake of my own freedom but also, I kinda like having my own secret world where I don't have to explain or justify anything to anyone.

It's also why whenever this question has come up in the past, I'll usually say that I want to move somewhere new first before making it any more obvious that I'm not just a non-conformist. So that anyone who knows the truth has only ever known the real me without the mask, and I don't have to explain myself to family or people I've barely spoken to in a decade.

[-] CheeseToastie@lazysoci.al 1 points 21 minutes ago

That's so true, the more they know the more you need to explain yourself. It's exhausting

[-] compostgoblin@slrpnk.net 6 points 11 hours ago

Haven’t come out to any of them yet. They’re all pretty devout Catholics and live in a red state, and my brother has repeated some of the “the schools are teaching the kids to be trans” bullshit, so I don’t have high hopes for any of them being supportive. I think coming out would probably mean most, if not all, of them stop talking to me. They’re likely to be the last ones I ever come out to

[-] CheeseToastie@lazysoci.al 3 points 8 hours ago

That's rough mate and I feel for you. Do you have support from other people?

[-] AlwaysNurture 2 points 10 hours ago
[-] sexyskinnybitch 5 points 15 hours ago

My family? Totally. My relatives? Not so much. My parents barely tolerate me, which is why I choose my family over my relatives every day.

[-] CheeseToastie@lazysoci.al 2 points 7 hours ago

I really like that distinction

[-] hellfire103@lemmy.ca 12 points 22 hours ago
  • Brother: Chill
  • Dad: Supportive of sexuality; on the fence about gender
  • Mum: Supportive of sexuality; critical of gender
  • Grandparents: Two of them are okay with homosexuality, but that's about it. The other two read the Daily Express, so yeah...
[-] Nikki 4 points 18 hours ago

parents understand and support me

siblings (that im in contact with) support me, others i lost contact for other reasons before coming out

grandparents love me but genuinely dont understand trans people at a fundamental level, i still need to explain a lot to them

generally everyone ive come out to are supportive, everyone i havent dont even recognize me or think im one of my sisters so whatever lol

[-] oftheair 6 points 20 hours ago* (last edited 20 hours ago)
[-] NickwithaC@lemmy.world 1 points 21 minutes ago

I'm your dad now and I love you.

[-] Zizzy 5 points 20 hours ago

Ive been completely cut off from my family for nearing a decade, so, not very lol

[-] CheeseToastie@lazysoci.al 3 points 19 hours ago

Ditto! If I need parents I go to !dadforaminute@lemmy.world They're a lovely group of internet parents

[-] thoughtfuldragon 9 points 23 hours ago

It varies, most aren't. I grew closer to the ones that supported me when I came out, like my aunts. The others I just sort of stopped talking to as it became clear they had no interest in changing their views.

[-] CheeseToastie@lazysoci.al 6 points 23 hours ago

Yep it was similar for me. They won't change so I don't associate with them. My aunt is fine with it so all is good

[-] Uncouth 4 points 19 hours ago

Haven't come out, but in terms of the gradual changes, support from mom, the opposite from dad, brother 1 pretty neutral, haven't seen brother 2 much.

this post was submitted on 05 May 2025
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