I'm still fresh off in my transition, but the day is growing nearer that I am "visibly trans" in public. I live in a very rural town and although I dress very femme, I feel like my growing breasts are going to end up attracting a lot of attention.

I'm lucky to not have been faced with direct bigotry or transphobia but I've definitely been around "friends and family" who have shared hurtful and terrible viewpoints about my identity. These people are no longer in my life for obvious reasons, but that isn't something I can control with strangers in public.

My best defense is to not let it get to me in the moment and ignore any comments I may hear. That, and the pepper spray attached to my purse. ✌🏻

If I ever get confronted by a Christian specifically, I have John 6, 37 locked and loaded.

Other than that, I want to try my best and have an actual conversation and explain things. It seems to me that many transphobes just don't know jackshit, and fearing or hating the unknown is all too common.

I guess that'll depend on how I'm feeling on any given day though. I know won't always have the patience for it.

I have decided to not hide, even though I am well aware I pass. I will bring up my transness if it relates to the topic of conversation and contributes in some way. I have friends by my side and I do not live in a particularly bad area to being trans in. I am not afraid and pepper spray is legal here. Not hiding gives me the opportunity to filter out people given their responses, or they can just go away themselves.

I try to be as cis passing as possible most of the time. If I don't feel like I'm passing I isolate. Still in the process of getting all of the physical effects of transitioning and it's exhausting and physically uncomfortable to conceal certain body parts but you gotta do what ya gotta do.

Got misgendered today for the first time in a while. For some damn reason I change my voice between girl or man completely subconsciously depending on the person I meet. I think it's a safeguard against potential transphobia or something because it's 100% not intentional. I fuckin hate it. Subconscious cues or some shit to protect myself in my small ass rural southern town where everybody knows my family or is related to me somehow (I'm moving in September, thank God. The person who misgendered me I'd never met but knew my family). I'm sensitive AF to that kind of stuff and want to avoid it as much as possible (of course, while consuming transphobic media so that I can prepare myself for every possible thing).

I feel such an aversion to talking about being trans to anyone irl because I'm afraid they'll potentially be transphobic or view me differently. Feels embarrassing, shameful on some level because of the culture I was raised in and the media I consumed.

So far it seems that I just ignore it. The other day I was at the DMV and the lady helping me was pissed that I put female on my driver's license application. Internally it made me sad but I tried not to express anything outwardly. Idk if that's the best approach, but in the moment that's what I decided to do.

One approach that can work, if you can be confrontational: You counter their offensive with your own!

Often their vile behaviour stems from an underlying emotional damage, so all you have to do is to remind them of that damage. Make it personal. Make it hurt.

Here are some of my best lines I have used so far, best delivered in a dry tone that cements them as a fact. Leave no room for questions, because you are stating the obvious.

Assumption is the other person is a cis-het-male. There is also the danger or further escalation, See so beware!

Haven't had it directed at me but a stern face/voice asking people what's so funny about their shitty little jokes, forcing them to elaborate, usually shuts them up.

Every day the urge to actually start to transition gets stronger but I just can't quite yet. Job/money(to leave the state I've been stuck in for longer than I'd like)/anxiety.

I've got a great stern, motherfucker-ly face for it (which I don't like but does have its utility).

I hate to say you get tough, but it’s what I did

It depends on the type of transphobia. Actually dangerous assholes I won't engage, but if it's just a preacher at the subway I'll go full unhinged demon on them.

99% of it I ignore and walk past/away from