48
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
view the rest of the comments
this post was submitted on 21 Mar 2024
48 points (100.0% liked)
Trans
760 readers
109 users here now
General trans community.
Rules:
-
Follow all blahaj.zone rules
-
All posts must be trans-related. Other queer-related posts go to c/lgbtq.
-
Don't post negative, depressing news articles about trans issues unless there is a call to action or a way to help.
Resources:
Best resource: https://github.com/cvyl/awesome-transgender Site with links to resources for just about anything.
Trevor Project: crisis mental health services for LGBTQ people, lots of helpful information and resources: https://www.thetrevorproject.org/
The Gender Dysphoria Bible: useful info on various aspects of gender dysphoria: https://genderdysphoria.fyi/en
StainedGlassWoman: Various useful essays on trans topics: https://stainedglasswoman.substack.com/
Trans resources: https://trans-resources.info/
[USA] Resources for trans people in the South: https://southernequality.org/resources/transinthesouth/#provider-map
[USA] Report discrimination: https://action.aclu.org/legal-intake/report-lgbtqhiv-discrimination
[USA] Keep track on trans legislation and news: https://www.erininthemorning.com/
[GERMANY] Bundesverband Trans: Find medical trans resources: https://www.bundesverband-trans.de/publikationen/leitfaden-fuer-behandlungssuchende/
[GERMANY] Trans DB: Insurance information (may be outdated): https://transdb.de/
[GERMANY] Deutsche Gesellschaft für Transidentität und Intersexualität: They have contact information for their advice centers and some general information for trans and intersex people. They also do activism: dgti.org
*this is a work in progress, and these resources are courtesy of users like you! if you have a resource that helped you out in your trans journey, comment below in the pinned post and I'll add here to pass it on
founded 9 months ago
MODERATORS
I try to be as cis passing as possible most of the time. If I don't feel like I'm passing I isolate. Still in the process of getting all of the physical effects of transitioning and it's exhausting and physically uncomfortable to conceal certain body parts but you gotta do what ya gotta do.
Got misgendered today for the first time in a while. For some damn reason I change my voice between girl or man completely subconsciously depending on the person I meet. I think it's a safeguard against potential transphobia or something because it's 100% not intentional. I fuckin hate it. Subconscious cues or some shit to protect myself in my small ass rural southern town where everybody knows my family or is related to me somehow (I'm moving in September, thank God. The person who misgendered me I'd never met but knew my family). I'm sensitive AF to that kind of stuff and want to avoid it as much as possible (of course, while consuming transphobic media so that I can prepare myself for every possible thing).
I feel such an aversion to talking about being trans to anyone irl because I'm afraid they'll potentially be transphobic or view me differently. Feels embarrassing, shameful on some level because of the culture I was raised in and the media I consumed.
Hun, I think this might be doing you more harm than good. Unfortunately we can’t completely avoid the hurt we’ll face in life because we’re trans. But you can avoid consuming that media, and save yourself that hurt. It’s not going to help you grow a thicker skin. If anything, it will only take away your emotional capacity for when things like today happen. I’m really sorry you got misgendered, but you sound really strong and I know you’ve got this until you move! 💪
I've been trying to work on it and have been doing better with it than I used to. The damage has been done, but healing is a process that takes a while. It's definitely a form of digital self harm.
I’m glad to hear that you’ve been working on it, and you’re right, healing is a process. I used to do it a lot too so I understand. There is also unfortunately times where it can be pertinent to see what new ways to preach hate people are coming up with. Good luck, and please keep taking care of yourself <3
I also subconsciously switch my voice around certain people. I can do a really good fem voice when I'm at home in my room, but as soon as I know others are listening it immediately becomes more masculine. I'm getting better at doing it around my family, but anytime I'm in public my masc voice comes out and it is so frustrating and dysphoric. I never understood why I did it, but subconsciously trying to hide that I'm trans makes sense, although I look very fem now so my masc voice really isn't helping me.
Oof, I feel the "everyone knows my family" part... I work the same area/career in which my dad is well known, it's seriously the main reason I haven't even considered starting to transition or coming out. The joking behind people's backs would be unstoppable and I hate it, and it would probably shoot both of our careers in the foot even if he is supportive, or be outright hostile if he isnt.