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[-] riskable@programming.dev 181 points 1 month ago

I browse "All" most of the time and the Femcel Memes show up pretty regularly. It's not like this gif though. It's more like watching a super interesting science experiment.

"Ah, yes. I see. I see. How interesting!"

My scientific notes so far:

  • They crave cuddles. It's almost like a cuddle-based economy.
[-] EggInDisguise 136 points 1 month ago

They crave cuddles.

Who among us cannot say the same?

[-] benderbeerman@lemmy.world 40 points 1 month ago

I just took an NFPA 70E electrical safety course, and the instructor was talking about how electricians love to cuddle.

I thought it was weird for a sec, then I remembered the last time I opened an electrical panel with someone else nearby. Then I remembered every other time I opened an electrical panel with other people nearby. Then I remembered all the times that I was all the other people nearby.

Then he showed us a video of an arc flash with 3 people inside the panel, and then there was nobody nearby.

[-] gigastasio@sh.itjust.works 47 points 1 month ago

Arc flashes are nature’s way of saying cuddle time is over.

[-] wonderingwanderer@sopuli.xyz 19 points 1 month ago

Straight guys can't say it. Not because they don't crave them, they just can't say that they do without social sanction. Everyone else apparently gets a pass though.

[-] ScytheDraven47@piefed.zip 16 points 1 month ago

I'll say it; I crave cuddles.

Cuddles while watching TV is one of the only things that'll pull me away from my computer.

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[-] FerretyFever0@fedia.io 55 points 1 month ago

Another note is that they seem to all be autistic, with many of them exhibiting symptoms of severe depression. Most are also trans lesbians. Many seem to be cat/fox/puppygirls.

[-] bdonvr@thelemmy.club 35 points 1 month ago

Conclusion: headpats are in order

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[-] wonderingwanderer@sopuli.xyz 23 points 1 month ago

Depressed autistic transbians commiserating about loneliness

"Aw cute puppygirls!" head pats

Depessed autistic cis guys commiserating about loneliness

"Ew gross incels, yuck!" social stigma

[-] SharkWeek 23 points 1 month ago

The difference being that the puppygirls aren't lashing out and demeaning others ... they're just bed rotting while watching yaoi

[-] wonderingwanderer@sopuli.xyz 14 points 1 month ago

Lots of lonely guys aren't lashing out and demeaning others either, but people don't notice them because they're not lashing out and demeaning others. They still get labeled as incels though, and if they find that hurtful then people will absolutely shred them for it anyway.

Also, they'll be shamed for bed rotting, and shamed for watching yuri. No matter what they do, they'll be shamed for it. So it's honestly not surprising when a number of them end up lashing out.

[-] SharkWeek 8 points 1 month ago

Are people calling those who don't behave like assholes "incel" though?

And do you think that women are not judged if they behave in the femcel manner?

It seems like you're applying a double standard, there.

[-] wonderingwanderer@sopuli.xyz 7 points 1 month ago

Yes, people do call even the ones who aren't being assholes "incels." It's a derogatory term that gets used against anyone who doesn't get laid. Like calling someone a "virgin." It's shitty, and it promotes toxic masculinity. It also objectifies women by implying that men need to "get p***y" in order to be worthy of basic respect.

And I'm tired of hearing this excuse that "it doesn't refer to literal involuntary celibates, it refers to redpilled misogynistic jerks." But that simply isn't true, because people definitely apply it to literal "involuntary celibates" and use it as an insult like calling someone a "virgin." It's childish and immature. Also, there are lots of misogynistic jerks who get laid. Focusing all your ire on "incels" misses the point entirely, lets those people off the hook, and perpetuates the issue by communicating the subtext that "you can be a misogynistic jerk as long as you get laid, and then we'll still respect you." If you can't see how that's toxic and detrimental to society, then I can't help you.

And do you think that women are not judged if they behave in the femcel manner?

They're more likely to be fetishized, which is bad in a different way. But it certainly hasn't risen to the level of a cultural pastime like shaming incels has.

It seems like you're applying a double standard, there.

I'm not the one applying a double-standard. I'm pointing out the double-standard.

I never said "femcels should be shamed, and incels shouldn't be."

I said "femcels don't get shamed the same way incels do."

If the former is how you interpret the latter, that's on you. If I need to explicitly state what I meant, it's closer to this:

"Maybe nobody should be shamed for being lonely and having poor social skills, regardless of gender."

If the issue is misogyny, target the misogyny. Not the inability to get sex, because that is going to do nothing to address the misogyny.

[-] Soulg@ani.social 5 points 1 month ago

All well said and more articulate than I could pull off, bravo.

[-] wonderingwanderer@sopuli.xyz 4 points 1 month ago

I've had to put a lot of thought into this over the years, because usually anything I say about it gets deflected into a strawman and then I just get called a redpilled incel and suddenly people assume that I'm making demands on women's bodies, when all I'm demanding is the same baseline level of respect that literally everyone else deserves.

So I have to navigate the argument very delicately, or else people assume I meant things that I didn't say.

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[-] SharkWeek 3 points 1 month ago

From that wall of text, I'm going to surmise that "incel" has been used as a pejorative towards you, with a reason that you're blind to

[-] wonderingwanderer@sopuli.xyz 3 points 1 month ago

From that dismissive answer, I'm going to surmise that you leap to conclusions about people and throw around "incel" as an insult because it makes you feel powerful to punch down on people with poor social skills.

[-] SharkWeek 3 points 1 month ago

I've never used that word as a pejorative. In fact, my favourite regular was a man who found himself unable to socialise with women

[-] wonderingwanderer@sopuli.xyz 3 points 1 month ago

Okay, you're just assuming I'm blind to some reason that you assume people have to call me that pejoratively, as you assume they do. You don't actually use it pejoratively, just strongly insinuate it. Got it.

[-] SharkWeek 3 points 1 month ago

Oh no, I think you're a self-centered prize dickhead.

[-] wonderingwanderer@sopuli.xyz 3 points 1 month ago

You're the one who made this conversation about me, so calling me self-centered feels a bit like a really shitty attempt at entrapment.

You clearly give so many shits though, to still be carrying on. But going off the responses by people who actually read what I said in my "wall of text" that you didn't read before firing off insults, they seemed to think it was an articulate and well-reasoned argument.

So maybe you're the dickhead?

[-] SharkWeek 3 points 1 month ago
[-] wonderingwanderer@sopuli.xyz 3 points 1 month ago

Huh? Oh, you're still here? That's weird...

[-] SharkWeek 3 points 1 month ago
[-] wonderingwanderer@sopuli.xyz 3 points 1 month ago

Yeah, I just think it's weird that you care so much about punching down on people you view as lesser. Like you seriously must really enjoy insulting people who already don't do well socially.

It's not really the fact that you're commenting that's weird, it's the malice that you do it with and the fact that you apparently don't have anything better to do than demean others. And how you try to do so with this pretense of moral superiority.

I'm just glad I don't have to live with so much hatred in my heart. That sounds heavy. I kinda pity you, actually...

[-] SharkWeek 3 points 1 month ago

If I enjoyed punching down on men who have problems getting laid, why would I have enjoyed fucking so many of them?

[-] wonderingwanderer@sopuli.xyz 3 points 1 month ago

So does "social skills" = "getting laid" in your opinion?

Because I only mentioned social skills, and you seemed to make the leap to "getting laid."

That sounds like a you problem.

Also, I don't care who you fuck or how much you enjoy it. It's kinda weird that you're trying to use that to justify being an asshole.

[-] SharkWeek 3 points 1 month ago

It means that those guys are no longer incels, by definition

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[-] DeadDigger@lemmy.zip 3 points 1 month ago

Hmm yes they often are even when they are just complaining that they disdain the situation. I don't know about women though I don't know that many that are bed rotting

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[-] ChicoSuave@lemmy.world 12 points 1 month ago

They'll be nice if you give them a pink monster and tell them they're a good girl.

[-] applebusch 7 points 1 month ago

I prefer white monster but yes

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[-] QuinnyCoded@sh.itjust.works 30 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

just wait till you see the cuddle parties in vrchat with full body tracking hehe

(I'm the one with piece signs)

though, unfortunately not with the folks from femcel memes... :(

^cough cough !VRChat@sh.itjust.works cough cough^

[-] WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today 4 points 1 month ago

Strange as fuck heh. Also, it's a rich person solution as well.

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this post was submitted on 02 May 2026
592 points (100.0% liked)

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