ex-kakapo by sturger in c/science_memes@mander.xyz
[-] sturger@sh.itjust.works 31 points 4 weeks ago

Replace "dig a hole" with "live in mom's basement" and this describes another common species as well.

70
Shower Thoughts on AI (sh.itjust.works)
submitted 1 month ago by sturger@sh.itjust.works to c/fuck_ai@lemmy.world
8 comments fedilink

If “AI” was really half of what it was cracked up to be, here’s how I would imagine it would have gone down:

AI Co: “Hello everyone. We would like to present our AI code writer. “AI, please write the code behind Google’s search engine.”
AI: “Here ya go: ”
Google: “That’s very impressive.”
AI Co: “AI, please fix all the bugs in Google Voice that make it run slow as dog feces.”
AI: “Done. ”.
Google: “Ok, we will give you $50B right now for 100% of everything you own. Don’t breathe a word of this to anyone.”

6 months later: “In today’s news, Google Inc. has just released it’s 30th major product. The industry is shocked and suspects perhaps Google has figured out some type of AI program to write code. Google has announced it has purchased AI Inc. for an undisclosed amount. Google has also announced it is laying off 60% of its staff worldwide. Only CEOs and marketing personnel remain.”

In reality, Sam Altman appears to be a man who has created a machine that allegedly points out massive gold deposits. But rather than mining gold, he insists on selling machines that find gold mines.

141
FedEx and UPS are merging. The new company will be named "Fed-Up" (sh.itjust.works)
submitted 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) by sturger@sh.itjust.works to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world
10 comments fedilink
16
For decades hackers gave themselves cool names like ROBot and Aynedroid. Now AIs are trying to seem human by giving themselves names like, "No, seriously. My name is Rob" (sh.itjust.works)
submitted 4 months ago by sturger@sh.itjust.works to c/showerthoughts@sh.itjust.works
1 comments fedilink
487
If CEOs think they can replace everyone with AI, why do they think Wall St. will need CEOs? (sh.itjust.works)
submitted 6 months ago by sturger@sh.itjust.works to c/showerthoughts@lemmy.world
69 comments fedilink

Tech CEOs have this wet dream where they just speak into a microphone, "Create my product" and employees will no longer be needed. So... if it becomes that easy, why will Wall Street need tech CEOs?

Google Assistant Is Basically on Life Support and Things Just Got Worse by sturger in c/technology@lemmy.world
[-] sturger@sh.itjust.works 39 points 6 months ago

My how things have changed over the years! Why, when I was a young girl, we didn't have the internet. When we wanted to turn a light on, we had to write a letter to Ford Motor Co. (They were the tech of the day.) I'd write, "Dear Mr. Ford, please give us permission to turn on our light in the dining room." Of course then we'd have to find a stamp, then walk the letter down to the nearest post office. (That was faster than waiting for the mailman to pick it up from the neighborhood mail box.) Sure enough, 6 weeks later we'd receive a reply saying, "Fine, turn on the light in the dining room." The postman delivered mail in the morning, so we had to wait until dark to all gather around in the dining room and turn on the light with great ceremony.

We never understood why we needed to get permission from a company far away to turn on a light switch, but we were patriotic Americans, so we knew better than to question the process.

Kevin Spacey calls for the release of the 'Epstein files' by sturger in c/nottheonion@lemmy.world
[-] sturger@sh.itjust.works 46 points 7 months ago

The only way I can lose is if I'm caught in bed with either a dead girl or a live boy.

-- Edwin Edwards

These past few years have been very illuminating by sturger in c/politicalmemes@lemmy.world
[-] sturger@sh.itjust.works 42 points 8 months ago

Now watch as Dems throw their support behind the independent in order to undermine Zohran.

Tesla Robotaxi Freaks Out and Drives into Oncoming Traffic on First Day by sturger in c/technology@lemmy.world
[-] sturger@sh.itjust.works 31 points 8 months ago

Oh, stop your complaining. It’s not perfect, but we’ve all seen how easy this is to fix. Just barge into Tesla tomorrow and randomly fire 20% of the employees. That’s how real leaders get things done.

/s

Half of companies planning to replace customer service with AI are reversing course by sturger in c/technology@lemmy.world
[-] sturger@sh.itjust.works 49 points 8 months ago

Man, if only someone could have predicted that this AI craze was just another load of marketing BS.

/s

This experience has taught me more about CEO competence than anything else.

DA says 40 UnitedHealthcare execs got bodyguards, and one dyed her hair after Luigi Mangione killed CEO Brian Thompson by sturger in c/news@lemmy.world
[-] sturger@sh.itjust.works 49 points 8 months ago

So how many of the execs said, “This job isn’t worth risking my life for” and quit? How many of them said, “Maybe we should examine how we do business and change.”? How many of them said, “My God. We’re killing people. I’m out.”?

I HATE email by sturger in c/memes@lemmy.world
[-] sturger@sh.itjust.works 39 points 8 months ago

I legit got an e-mail from Facebook telling me that I should join Facebook because “no one uses e-mail anymore”. Ummmm…..well someone must be still using e-mail and No.

Everyone's a winner! by sturger in c/shirtsthatgohard@lemmy.world
[-] sturger@sh.itjust.works 40 points 8 months ago

Is she saying that she's a tight-ass?

101
Why is it so hard to buy the same toothbrush twice? (sh.itjust.works)
submitted 9 months ago by sturger@sh.itjust.works to c/nostupidquestions@lemmy.world
23 comments fedilink

The title is a bit of an exaggeration.

Why do corporations change shampoo and toothbrushes so often? I'll go through 10 different shampoos and toothbrushes, then find ones I like. I'll probably be able to purchase them again a few times before the ones I like are no longer available.

What are the forces driving manufacturer's to change their basic wares so often? Besides Wall St. greed, that is?

After donating $1m to Trump and axing DEI, Target CEO watches his salary get chopped in half by tariffs and angry shoppers by sturger in c/upliftingnews@lemmy.world
[-] sturger@sh.itjust.works 39 points 9 months ago

Oh no! His salary was slashed 50% to only $9M?!?!? How does the poor dear survive?

Most of us survive on less than 1% of that. Yay! We're One Percenters!

A German Experiment Proved That Simple Concrete Spheres Make Fantastic Batteries. Now, California Plans To Submerge A 9-Meter Diameter Sphere In The Ocean And Is Already Planning Versions Of 30 Meters by sturger in c/science@lemmy.world
[-] sturger@sh.itjust.works 34 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

Every time I see these “We’ll do X in/around the ocean” projects I think, “These people have not spent a lot of time near the ocean.”

Replaced this drive today by sturger in c/sysadmin@lemmy.world
[-] sturger@sh.itjust.works 73 points 9 months ago

Is that the Striped RAID I keep hearing about?

/s

58
AI is the first tech that literally created its own marketing hype. (sh.itjust.works)
submitted 11 months ago by sturger@sh.itjust.works to c/showerthoughts@lemmy.world
7 comments fedilink
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sturger

joined 1 year ago