207
Is Anon the asshole? (sh.itjust.works)
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[-] RBWells@lemmy.world 2 points 16 hours ago

Not wrong to do. Wrong to do without asking first.

[-] k0e3@lemmy.ca 114 points 1 week ago

Don't fuck with people's shit without asking wtf. Life isn't like TV, not every surprise is going to be appreciated.

[-] zigmus64@lemmy.world 81 points 1 week ago

Asshole: no.

Misguided: yes.

His reaction isn’t unreasonable. Misplaced well intentioned actions likely will not end as intended. Ultimately, she didn’t get it. She misunderstood what he loved about the guitar.

[-] cRazi_man@europe.pub 27 points 1 week ago

The whole idea of "surprises" is complete bullshit. Social media has really over romanticised this to an extreme. When my wife gets a present, it costs quite a lot. I'm not going to take a chance of judging her taste, pick a brand I know nothing about and try to guess what she would like. We've got an agreement that we pick our own presents and make our plans together. No surprises bullshit. Might be boring by social media standards, but it's the best I can do.

[-] RBWells@lemmy.world 2 points 16 hours ago

I love to find something for a person that they don't even know they want until I give it to them, and that they will love. Can't do it on demand though - I have to see something and think "wow, cRazi-man would love this and I bet he's never even seen one.". Then buy or make whatever it is for that one person.

My kids say that now their standards for gifts are crazy because that is how I gift. Not many, not often, only when inspired, I don't think they realized it was unusual.

I don't understand the value of random crap. But do think that a surprise can be so good.

[-] paultimate14@lemmy.world 15 points 1 week ago

The modern western version of "gifts" is really about pushing over-consumption. If marketers cannot convince you to buy something yourself, they can try to convince someone else to buy it for you.

I've always felt that gifts should be tokens. Symbols of good will, reminders of the relationship. Consumable gifts are great, especially when shared with the giver. Alcohol is great for this, but there's plenty more you can do. Small, inexpensive art prints or figurines.

I don't want someone else to buy me something I woukd want to research myself. My parents gave me a "snow thrower" for Christmas a couple years ago. Its a relatively cheap, Ryobi 40v thing- I do not own anything else that uses that battery ecosystem. My step-dad loves his, and I am it is great for their 2-car driveway, but my driveway can probably fit like 10 cars in it, and I would have rather saved up for something nicer myself. Now i'm in this weird limbo where I feel socially obligated to use it for several years at least before I replace it with something I actually want.

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[-] Malyca@lemmy.zip 59 points 1 week ago

Yeah, you don't fuck with shit a person is that attached to because you think it "looks rough"

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[-] AllNewTypeFace@leminal.space 42 points 1 week ago

fake: 4chan poster has a husband

[-] whyNotSquirrel@sh.itjust.works 27 points 1 week ago

Gay: 4chan poster has a husband

[-] Sanctus@anarchist.nexus 35 points 1 week ago

God damn, yeah, you are unfortunately.

[-] Dettweiler42@lemmy.dbzer0.com 29 points 1 week ago

A worn appearance is often desired on old guitars. In some cases, it can even increase its value.

That, and the OP probably did what would be considered finishing someone's puzzle for them.

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[-] baltakatei@sopuli.xyz 27 points 1 week ago

It's like taking someone's tried and true Windows 7 machine and upgrading it to Windows 11.

[-] Amnesigenic@lemmy.ml 9 points 1 week ago

No, that's nothing at all like a repair, that's a downgrade

[-] protogen420 8 points 1 week ago

some poorly done repairs can be a downgrade

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[-] leaky_shower_thought@feddit.nl 23 points 1 week ago

anon: congratulations, you're being rescued

guitar: "..."

anon: please do not resist

[-] nousername@lemmus.org 20 points 1 week ago

Depends how it was “fixed” If the pro tuned it to make it sound perfect that’s great. But probably anon got the damage repaired, taking away its charm and character. Of course anon doesn’t even know the difference between these two things.

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[-] Someonelol@lemmy.dbzer0.com 20 points 1 week ago

Electric guitars are little more than a piece of wood, metal strings, and a transducer. For a lot of musicians what matters most is the sentimental value of their model. What she did was basically rob the owner of that.

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[-] lightnsfw@reddthat.com 20 points 1 week ago

I for one don't like people touching my shit. Especially shot that I've already put effort into myself. Ask first before you do something like that.

[-] GraniteM@lemmy.world 18 points 1 week ago

Beat up old guitar in need of refurbishment:

[-] FrChazzz@lemmus.org 9 points 1 week ago

The obsession I have with Trigger...

I love that Willie, a very rich man, still plays THIS guitar and only this guitar. Like, you go to concerts and there's a guitar tech grabbing different instruments off stage, swapping them out. But ol' Willie just up there with bus up Trigger looking like she's about to collapse into splinters. But she produces such a unique sound that no other guitar can match.

[-] Almacca@aussie.zone 7 points 1 week ago

The lead singer from Cake has one of the worst sounding guitar tone you'll ever hear, but it's perfect in the context of their songs. 'Fixing' it to make it sound good would ruin it. https://youtu.be/lBcCoia3pJQ

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[-] rizzothesmall@sh.itjust.works 18 points 1 week ago

If you have to ask the internet if you are an asshole then it's either because you are definitely an asshole, or because you are karma farming - in which case, you are an asshole.

[-] idiomaddict@lemmy.world 14 points 1 week ago

Depends what “fix” means, but if you didn’t get ripped off for $200, yes.

Getting it professionally tuned isn’t unreasonable imo, especially if the neck/pegs are misaligned, but in no world should that cost $200 (and don’t try to fix a misalignment).

Once you start making changes that can’t be undone, you’ve crossed the line. Get it tuned, get a nice strap (with mounting hardware, if needed), get a polishing kit or nicer case, hell, even get a replacement bridge/pegs and tools for working with a guitar, but don’t make permanent changes yourself (or have anyone else do so). All of those together could be well over $200, but you’d describe that as a tuneup and buying accessories, not taking the guitar “to a pro to fix it.”

Caveat that some people don’t like non-musicians or anyone else even touching their instruments, but I’d like to think that would be obvious to a spouse, even one who might have assumed that permanent changes to an instrument they don’t own are okay.

I’m a non-musician and my husband has a somewhat beaten up, but favored instrument that he learned on, so I’ll send this to him to see if my instinct is right (for my relationship, which does not mean it would be right for anyone else).

Though tbf, even thinking it might be okay, I got my husband a new instrument instead of messing with his beloved one, just because it occurred to me that he might react like the husband in the OP, and I didn’t want to risk it. Of course, he could also have then felt guilty about using the new one because it’s not the one he loves and felt guilty about using the old one because I gifted him a “nicer” one. I was lucky in that he’d already branched out into related instruments and the new one could fill a new niche, so wouldn’t compete with the old, making me less worried about him feeling conflicted [I'm so sorry about that sentence, I’m imagining trying to structure it in German without nominalizing any of the clauses and… woof].

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[-] Almacca@aussie.zone 13 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

So many arguments in this thread with so little information. Ah, the internet.

He probably just though it didn't sound the same any more, and it probably didn't, and he probably preferred the old 'crappy' sound. "They say she's the same [Becky], but she's not the same [Becky]."

[-] Krankenwagen@lemmy.world 7 points 1 week ago

It's the Internet so I'd say 1) this definitely didn't happen and 2) it was written this way specifically to bait engagement.

[-] bstix@feddit.dk 13 points 1 week ago
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[-] Jimbo@pawb.social 12 points 1 week ago

Yep. Literally all anon had to do was talk to him about it first. Communication is so fucking important. I would know because a lack of it was what ended my almost decade long relationship. Talk to your fucking partners, even if it's uncomfortable in the moment. If you don't you will be MUCH more uncomfortable later when everything explodes.

[-] RFKJrsBrainworm@sh.itjust.works 11 points 1 week ago

Reading the comments...is there one actual guitar player here? Does anyone know what the fuck actually goes into setting the intonation and adjusting the action of the strings?

And people talking about permanent changes they could have made....what possible changes are getting done for 200...the proper parts alone would cost at least half of that and no one is doing work in a shop for free.

So presumably she had it set up which means strings were changed, intonation was properly setup and the action was adjusted with a truss rod check and some feet polishing.

If he's pissed the intonation is correct hes just a shitty player.

[-] P1k1e@lemmy.world 20 points 1 week ago

Or he liked that it was his guitar that he salvaged with his own hands.

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[-] liking625@lemmy.world 9 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

The key is "he loves it. I take from him without him knowing", whyyyy?

[-] some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org 8 points 1 week ago

Yeah, absolutely. If you took something that I painted (I can't paint, fwiw) and had it touched up, fuck you.

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[-] Dirk@lemmy.ml 8 points 1 week ago

Short answer: yes.

Long answer: yes, but longer.

[-] rounding_error@lemmy.today 7 points 1 week ago
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this post was submitted on 11 Aug 2026
207 points (100.0% liked)

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