She hasn't heard from him since? She'd better unclench and make sure he's okay...
Well did she ever give his nose back?
Give him his nose back! Give him his nose back!
If you can't laugh during sex, then what dafuq are we even doing here‽
bc if you laugh it reminds me that my tiny peen is a joke and the erection goes away
Unless you're like 1.5 in 10,000(.015%),I can assure you your average or slightly above.
Edit: can't help myself, there's an abnormal amount of angry small dick fuckers here(of which, you are not one!).
I’m no expert but I don’t think that’s how bell curves work.
Edit to also add; my bad for making someone else feel better about themselves. I'll try not to make that mistake again.
It’s been a long while since I’ve seen an interrobang in the wild - you are a gentleperson and a scholar my good chum!
Sex is supposed to be a fun bonding experience. I see no problem. If you can't have dumb fun with your naked bestie who can you have fun with
This guy fucks
Green flag
brown flag.
Some of us pay good money for that
One of the best things about monogamy is how freely bodily fluids of all kinds can be shared carefree
(Unless it's feces; that's not out-of-the-box sanitary)
Well feces ideally isn't a fluid
I'm SORRY if we can't all meet Cosmo's latest unrealistic beauty standard of the week. If you can't handle my feces at its most-fluid, you don't deserve it at its most-viscous.
It took me a moment to realize you were referring to Cosmo the magazine. I saw that OP’s username is Mr Fish and immediately thought of Cosmo and Wanda.
Most managers pay good money for people who brown-nose them
The best sex I've ever had was with a woman who regularly (temporarily) cockblocked herself by making me laugh so hard I couldn't stay hard
A partner and I once got into an uncontrollable giggling fit when I referred to sex as 'thrusty cuddles'.
I had a similar response at a Maria Bamford show I went to earlier in the year when she said "I like it when he puts his dingle in my wet plop."
And now I'm giggling again.
The one I remember most clearly is like... sorry in advance for tmi. Do not continue reading if you dont want to read a sex story
So we tended to do a decent amount of foreplay, and this night it was really hot and heavy. She was really seductively trying to get me to say I needed to be inside her, and we were on that line of fooling around for a while in a way we were both really into. At one point I'm on my back and she's teasing me while straddling me, and I finally give in and tell her I need her. What does she do? Gives me the most Samuel Jackson ass expression she can muster and a "shit negro, that's all you had to say!" I almost died laughing
what if she farts, or accidentally poops.
My kind of gal.
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A collection of some classic Lemmy memes for your enjoyment
