281
2meirl4meirl
(lemmy.dbzer0.com)
Surely anyone can talk to plants?
What if you've been turned into a newt?
I'll get better
Surely anyone can instant death?
I'd be having a much better time if I could drink the become a dragon.
Its most of these things in one.
You have become dragon, hoarder of worthless shinies (still worth it, imo)
Absolutely
Become dragon pros:
- Fly
- Flame breath
- Cool factor
- Gold???
Become dragon cons:
- Lose all ability to form human connection and participate in the activities that make life worth living
- Life destroying depression caused by the overwhelming dysphoria of being trapped in the wretched body of a decrepit beast
- Can't reply to memes on Lemmy
Other pros:
- almost god-level magic
- body-morphing (into human too)
- can talk with spirits
- wisdom
Can totally reply to memes still. Just need bigger screen.
Edit: and I'm uninstalling that keyboard.
Pro: A penis larger than most people
Neither pro nor con: the penis retracts inside of one orifice that you also shit out of.
Con: No other dragons, everyone who you would want to use it on, runs away screaming.
EDIT: Tf you mean most? Who else has a penis the size of a whole human?
There are a few. Donald Trump is a giant fucking dick for example.
dragons can change into people homie 😎 at least in d&d
Talk to plants would probably be the most useful for the quiet simple life I want, but I worry this would be an aquaman situation where you just hear the screams of pain all the time.. I’d not at all be into that..
Every time your neighbour cuts the grass 😱
Dragon for sure. Then I wouldn't want the black one anymore.
Let's be honest, being able to relax any time is the only real superpower here.
the question is not if I have the power (I already do), but if i will have to face the consequences for doing so.
I too wish to be free of the consequences of talking to plants
"talk to plants" would go seriously wrong when cooking food and hearing their screams
First order of business: take out the assassin that tried to poison me a moment ago.
I thought the turquoise one said talk to parents
Flight, so I can more easily get to work, without being brought down by AA guns
I am my own worst enemy
this post was submitted on 03 Nov 2025
281 points (100.0% liked)
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