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meirl
(discuss.tchncs.de)
Imagine getting a compliment as a man lmao 🤣, shit be wild yo
Men die of thirst in a desert, women die of thirst in an ocean
This here ^ is the full context.
Before doing bar-back work getting a hit on by a woman who I didn't find attractive was still a nice confidence boost because it only happened rarely.
But doing bar-back work clearing away glasses from tables and wiping them down I got hit on so much by drunken women in bachelorette party after bachelorette party that it became really uncomfortable. Then came the inappropriate touching. That was not fun.
Before that job I had heard what women experience on a night out and had only seen it from a 3rd person perspective. But after that job I understand better what women are having to put up with regularly.
A gay guy once told me my glasses were cute.
Im married to a woman. But in that moment, I considered my new life as his man wife.
Clearly a man's man
In Pony Equestria mares compliment YOU!
That's the experience for some neurodivergent or somehow naïve women the first time. I was one of them (I thought older men were being kind with my teenage self). Then you start getting the same comment again and again: it often feels insincere. You start suspecting and learning about all the ways [mostly] men can be manipulating or even dangerous in the streets. It starts becoming bittersweet; you learn to ignore it just in case it's the people with bad intentions. You know that, if someone really wants to tell you that you're pretty or something, they will make an effort to make you feel safer too. And then, you are in your twenties and those men don't talk to you nearly as often, and it's a relief. As a heterosexual/bisexual woman, you hope that the rest of men can see you as more than a pretty body: a human with dreams, hobbies sense of humor, intelligence, whatever. Sometimes it's scary to know that many men don't, but many others do, so... yeah, my leftism hopes it gets better, as with many other social issues.
That's my experience.
I think having anyone tell you to smile more in any situation that isn't a posed photo is creepy because it's invalidating your emotional state, or telling you to stop feeling your feelings and replace them with how the other person wants you to feel... the most fucked-up instance of this that's happened to me was when a female therapist suggested "smiling more" as a prescription for depression.
All that aside, I have actually been catcalled on the street by women, and since it doesn't happen to me all the time I just found it funny. I have also been complimented in the office on my appearance by a female supervisor and it felt creepy, but had much worse sexual harassment from a male boss who apparently wasn't even gay, just doing it to mess with me.
A woman once told me that. Oh boy, did that stick with me for a long time.
A girl also told me I have nice eyes during high school. That was literally one of the bitterly few highlights of high school for me.
women don't do that, because they subconsciously know like 80% of men (including me) would see that as an opportunity for a pickup line, like "I would, if you went out with me" or "a hug/kiss would cheer me up" or some other borderline creepy stuff.
It's not exactly a pickup line but it is expressing interest. And that's how a lot of men use the line.
Telling someone they should "smile more" isn't expressing interest. It's a very weird demand. If you'd like to express interest in someone please consider a different approach.
"You should smile more" is a subtle way of saying "why are you such a stuck up bitch? Am i not good enough for you?"
No, it’s the “you look cute” part. As a man, I rarely ever get compliments. A “you look cute” would make my entire day. And I would smile at that!
Why is it creepy to be attracted to someone and tell them you're attracted to them? Isn't that, like, biology? What we're programmed to do?
Is it creepy for male birds to do mating dances to try to impress female birds?
Read the room though.
At a dating event? Sure.
At the bus stop? Uuuuh make small talk before that.
At work? Yikes.
It's creepy if they are not much attracted to you or don't know yet and it's hard to tell at first, hence you should be unobtrusive. The reason is, some men won't take no for an answer and many women are a bit scared by that and knowing you like them can mean they have to be more careful around you.
Pretty sure would smile a lot more if they received more positive attention ngl.
Someone told me I had an ugly smile once and I am still insecure about my smile to this day. If people told me I had a beautiful smile and that I should smile more, I think that would be amazing. I would be surprised, but really happy.
The person who told you that has an ugly personality.
Hey @Sauerkraut@discuss.tchncs.de you have a beautiful smile! 😁
I still remember the compliment i got about my eyebrows back in high school. I got super flustered and ran out of the class. I have a love/cringe relationship with that moment.
The disconnect between women and men is sad. Women say soo many things with the best of intentions, that just end up cutting way too deep and vice versa.
You look cute! - nice
You should smile more. - wtf
This would actually require dweebs leaving their basements.
It would require a woman who wasn't convinced she'd be stalked for the next six months.
This is the fear, isn't it? At work, I have a project manager who privately told me one of my juniors asked her out, because she requested a private meeting with him to go over a project that he's assigned to.
I did not expect my job to be having to explain to nerds that a woman talking to you directly isn't an invitation.
No it's just as infuriating and it's always been one of the complaints women bring up that I always remind them is not just a women problem.
Rbf can seriously negatively impact your life. Especially if you're already physically imposing.
?? I think I misunderstood your comment, did you said that its not cool to be cat called as a man?
I'm specifically referring to the phrase "you should smile more" not cat calling in general.
Oh I get it thx for the response
It's about it happening to you once every 10 years or once an hour.
Getting complimented once every ten years sounds awesome. It’s hard to even imagine once an hour
This isn't a compliment.
This post is discussing flirts per hour
Old ladies at my first job would tell this to Male interns all the time.
Productivity at 130%
Middle management hates this simple trick!
If this happened once instead of constantly
You talk about women right ? Because as a man I would love that it would happen all the time to me
you're assuming that because you don't have to live with the reality.
add in the constant awareness that most rapists occur by men against women and most men are stronger than women.
you wouldn't like theae solicitations or straight up molestation and assaults if you were constantly in danger of being raped and being reminded that men found you attractive or available.
What are you talking about, I said that I as a man would love to be cat called not that I would love that as a woman . I never receive compliment and I can assure you that I would love to be cat called.I don't say that what you said is false (it s not), just that its not what I was talking about.
"What are you talking about..."
you are not talking about getting catcalled, you are saying that if you got complimented, you would like it.
that is not what is happening to womenn getting catcalled; they are not receiving compliments, they are being harassed.
If you were catcalled multiple times a day every day you wouldn't find it as fun, since these are not components so much as an attempt to engage with you personally, which is time-consuming and doesn't benefit you, it only benefits the harasser, especially with the accompanying implication of rape or violence with each incident of harassment throughout the day.
I was talking about being cat called and I already got your point on how its horrible for woman to be always cat called because of the intimidation and threat that it implie.
...then you insisted that you would enjoy being catcalled, so I wanted to clarify that you wouldn't enjoy being catcalled; you would enjoy a different situation in which you are occasionally complimented in good faith without the threat of violence, which is a completely different situation than what women go through everyday being catcalled.
you wouldn't enjoy being catcalled.
you would enjoy receiving occasional good-faith compliments without the lurking threat of violence.
this post was submitted on 17 Nov 2024
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