AVOID #1!!!

Better to be alone and free to think and explore than to be tethered to someone that holds you back from exploring life. Sex is a fucked up drug addiction without an opt out for most of us. I've made a lot of effed up decisions, but not marrying any of my 3 long terms was not one of them.

I don't know about y'all, but I changed a whole lot every 5 years since 20. I feel more settled in my late 30's Getting disabled at 29 shakes my perspective away from any kind of norm. I can't imagine those changes meshing with anyone else and surviving this long.

Easily #1, but that's because they worded it as what her current interests are.

Just be interesting yourself, and put the work into finding out what about her interests are actually interesting. People find things interesting for a reason.

No one is actually boring, if you find someone boring it just means you dont understand them yet. Pay attention, listen, and try to see it through their eyes and maybe you'll find their "boring" interests aren't so boring after all, you just didnt "see" it fully yet to appreciate it.

And, typically, if you put the work into showing interest in whatever they are into, they'll reciprocate.

Also, there's infinite room for the two of you to both find new interests neither of you had before that now you both can share.

When my fiance and I started dating years ago, neither of us gave a shit about birds... but now that we live in a place with lots of cool random birds we can spot, and we go for walks everyday, we actually stop and go "holy shit what kind of bird is that, I dont recognize it" or "holy fuck are those pelicans? I didnt even know we got pelicans here!" etc etc.

The other day out of the blue when we were chilling at a nearby water reservoir watching a duck, a whole ass fuckin pelican came outta nowhere and swooped down, splashing into the water and sniped a random fish, then burst up with it in its mouth like... 2 feet in front of us. It was a pretty big "holy shit did that just happen?" moment.

If we hadn't been sitting there just enjoying watching a duck, we never would've gotten to see that pelican.

So, you know, maybe there's no such thing as "normie" interests, or a "boring" person. You might be the boring one if anything, because you can't understand why people love something and get interested in it...

Option #3:

Same as option #2, but replace BPD with autism, and less mental health issues once she figures out she doesn't need to pretend to be normal.

Pfft, reject the entire thing. Be patient, find someone that's compatible. It isn't like you have to settle right now.

Just had my first child with option 2

God help me, that booty is worth it

Ended up with 1. 2 just isn't worth it. Every time they went crazy

Both of these guys are going to remain single or, at best, in toxic relationships until they change their approach to both women and relationships.

Option #2 is sure to cause you trauma, trust issues in future relationships, and years of therapy.

Anyway, option #2.

I married #2

Option 1 sounds like a boring hell and option 2 sounds like an active hell.

I would pick 2. At least there would be some good and fun moments between the really bad ones. And sharing interests is an important part for me.

I was married for 13 years to a BPD witch. It was abusive, one time I spit my own blood in her face (proud of that). She liked to pick fights and hit me. Other than restraining her from hitting me and catching punches, I only got physical twice. Once with a coat hanger and once when I slapped her while I was holding a baby. Finally lost my religion and got out.

After some time, I started dating again. Using OkCupid when it was still good. Made two piles. One night stands and prospects.

All the crazy ones went into one night stands. It was fun.

Prospects were primarily sorted by intelligence, communication, kinkiness, career, having failed relationships and kids. First date was a lot like a job interview.

I hunted down the white buffalo. We just bought a play farm. She's nasty in bed, makes great money, is an amazing cook, sweet as pie, smart as a whip, has a fat bottom and is easy on my eyes. She's all around a better person than me.

Second time around I married up. I do my best to measure myself against making her happy.

We compare ourselves to mules. We're both pulling, if one mule stumbles, the other pulls harder until we can both pull again.

We've had tense discussions. Never yelled except during danger and never in anger. It's so easy it's scary. Trust and love that are still growing.

Number 2 sounds like a good friend but not a good wife.

It's a false dichotomy. Embrace polyamory.

Man, I wish I could have avoided option 2.

I learned the hard way...

Anyway, I just found a girl that I like and we have so much in common!

It's actually a spectrum

Number one is actually a trap because she probably won’t understand you and still will do stupid things.

I'm with 2 but instead of shared interests it's shared sense of humor and tendency toward self destructive alcoholism. I'm more and more convinced it's going to blow up in my face.

I was with a #2 for 9 years until I escaped. Then when I wasn't looking for a partner I was just meeting people and living for myself and then that's when I met the perfect person. Approaching a year and a half and it's such a breath of fresh air to be with someone who is on the same team.

#2 is because anyone who feels this way is also a mentally ill, bpd with daddy issues

#1 won't have any interest in you.

Never stick your dick in crazy.

Ever.

If a friend tries, you stop them. It never ends well.

Neither as far as being in a relationship, but #2 could be fine as a friend.

My wife: 1+2=3