24
submitted 1 day ago by PurpleFanatic@quokk.au to c/mtf

I'm a butch transbian. I've been thinking a lot lately about my butch identity, and how my experiences with butchness overlaps and maybe differs in some areas to my non-transfemme butch siblings. For example:

  • We've likely grown up with very different bodies and genitals, and that has impacted our relationship to our butchness
  • Our struggle with presenting butch in a way that doesn't get us misgendered or give us dysphoria
  • Dealing with the pressure from outside transfemme circles and inside to present more feminine
  • Feeling like a fraud in lesbian spaces, because I feel like I'm dressing like a "man", despite knowing that butch identity is a whole separate thing.
  • Fearing exclusion from cis lesbians, what if they think im a cis dude creeping around?
  • The lack of representation for butchness in transfemmininty
  • How do other butch transfemmes feel about femminine clothing?
  • How do we feel about compliments? Beautiful vs handsome?
  • Feeling tension between wanting to present more feminine in some ways to "escape" the masculinity I was imprisoned by growing up.

I would love to hear about any thoughts and experiences you've got.

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[-] strawberry_enjoyer42 2 points 1 day ago

This. Butches are basically the reverse of femboys, who can be cis guys or trans guys: it doesn't matter which, they just need to be guys who like feminine clothing.

(There are also trans men who consider themselves butches, and trans women who consider themselves femboys, but that seems out-of-scope).

[-] Chubbypunk@troet.cafe 1 points 1 day ago

@strawberry_enjoyer42 @PurpleFanatic ok, yes, got it.
There was still a wrong connection in my head.
Hope I dod not triggered you. Sorry.

[-] strawberry_enjoyer42 2 points 23 hours ago

No worries, your fine. I just can't help but put in my two cents when it comest to anything semantics-related.

this post was submitted on 25 Jun 2026
24 points (100.0% liked)

Transfem

5609 readers
181 users here now

A community for transfeminine people and experiences.

This is a supportive community for all transfeminine or questioning people. Anyone is welcome to participate in this community but disrupting the safety of this space for trans feminine people is unacceptable and will result in moderator action.

Debate surrounding transgender rights or acceptance will result in an immediate ban.

This community is supportive of DIY HRT. Unsolicited medical advice or caution being given to people on DIY will result in moderator action.

Posters may express that they are looking for responses and support from groups with certain experiences (eg. trans people, trans people with supportive parents, trans parents.). Please respect those requests and be mindful that your experience may differ from others here.

Some helpful links:

Support Hotlines:

founded 3 years ago
MODERATORS