TL;DR: it's important to be the best you that you can possibly be. Your journey may also help inspire others to do the same.
I recently learned that an old friend, whom I hadn't seen in a very long time, transitioned. Flawlessly. Passing. Confident. Content. They were a pretty boy before and a pretty girl now. I was, and still am, in awe of this change. But past the cosmetic side of this transition I was suddenly struck by everything else that went into it. Suddenly, my friend's looks took a back seat as I started to feel something else unexpected: inspiration.^1^
I didn't expect that kind of a personal impact, but I sat with it a while and watched my entire outlook zero-in on a very important question. The way I see it, this person took up the ultimate gnostic quest and challenged some very serious things about their life and identity. In the end, they arrived where they wanted to, rather than where they were expected to be. I've since learned more about what this really takes for a person and, frankly, it's clearly hard as fuck for a whole host of reasons. So, that caused me to reflect on my own life and choices. After all, if she put everything on the table and chose to fix what wasn't working, what choices should I be making?
In the year-plus that has passed I have taken efforts to reflect and double-check things. What assumptions are in play for my lifestyle and life trajectory? Am I taking myself for granted or do I have deeper questions, doubts, orientations, and biases that need exploration? What am I doing automatically versus what am I actively choosing to do? Am I being passive when life throws options at me? This whole new way of viewing things has caused me to make radical decisions for the better - something I wouldn't have done before.
So, yeah. You don't have to be a pro athelete, or some STEM wizard to be an inspiration. Just do your level best at being the best you that you can be.
- Okay, I caught feelings too, which opened up a whole other level of self-understanding. Especially in retrospect from before the transition. This is a good thing.
You also don’t have to be pretty or pass flawlessly to be an inspiration to others.
Absolutely true. Shit, I should have made that more clear in my post. Edit: fixed.
or fall within the gender binary!! (not to accuse you of anything, just sharing thoughts and experiences). early in our transition we had an enby friend who was HUGELY wonderful and was in fact the first we came out to. we owe her so much hehe
we've been on the other end too and its one of the most wonderful experiences ever seeing others figuring out themselves. an especially fun experience was another (genderqueer) plural system realizing themselves as such, and later on just seeing their eyes light up with JOY when we made it clear that we recognize and accept the otherkin identities that represent some of them.
we are not transspecies, nor do we understand what it's like. but also, not understanding something doesn't mean it doesn't exist! so be accepting of others :)