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submitted 17 hours ago by not_IO to c/onehundredninetysix
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[-] Soulg@ani.social 18 points 12 hours ago

1 picture of him in a dress does not make him trans

[-] Voroxpete@sh.itjust.works 14 points 12 hours ago* (last edited 12 hours ago)

On the one hand, we should always be cautious never to conclude anything about another person's gender on their behalf.

On the other hand, it's a lot more than one photo. And I'm not just talking about the fact that there's literally multiple photos from multiple shows. Kurt's family found a pretty sizeable collection of women's clothes and makeup in his home. There are multiple interviews where he talks about feeling closer to the feminine side of the human experience or how he always tended to gravitate more towards having female friends, lots of stuff like that.

There's also supposedly an early draft of All Apologies - supposed because the document exists but some people contend the authenticity - with the line "Let me grow some breasts."

None of this is conclusive and should not be read as such, but anyone who has seen someone struggling with their gender is going to have a hard time coming to any other conclusion. Given Kurt's obvious struggles with self-worth and eventual suicide, it's hard not to see a painfully familiar pattern playing out here.

I disagree with people who posthumously assign him she/her pronouns and insist on categorically stating he was trans - that's just as much misgendering as it would be to deny a trans person's identity - but I think it's a pretty reasonable assumption all told.

[-] sem 5 points 6 hours ago* (last edited 6 hours ago)

I think you've got the right of it. Deciding without asking that someone is "she" feels like a loss of agency on their part. Especially if Kurt is on the record saying he wished people wouldn't do that.

Thinking that Kurt's actions means he was gender nonconforming and possibly a trans woman is perfectly good and sad :'(

[-] Axolotl_cpp@feddit.it 6 points 12 hours ago* (last edited 12 hours ago)

Or...maybe he was just a femboy yk
Maybe, maybe not but it's still a possibility that many in this comment section seem to forget

this post was submitted on 18 May 2026
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