I hate that I literally was the girl on the right once and like not realizing what I just said for like an hour

The worst thing is tho, in german (the language it happened in) it means something far more lewd.... I feel so bad for saying it now ;-;

Some more alternatives to common tracker filled stuff:

• Google play store -> F-Droid (specific open scpurce apps)
• Google play store -> Aurora store (gets apps from google)
• YouTube/Soundcloud -> Newpipe (integrated adblock)
• google maps -> OpenStreetsMap (website) or OsmAnd (android)
• amazon -> your local store, pay in cash

More browsers:

• Waterfox (cut down version of Firefox) (Linux, Windows, android)
• duckduckgo (android)

Search engines:

• Startpage
• duckduckgo
• brave

Cheaper alternatives to Proton (if you pay): VPN:

• PrivateInternetAccess
• Hide.me

Mail:

• tuta
• mailinator (for creating temporary spam mails) (free)

I probably just experienced the worst week in a long while...

My insomnia is getting bad enough that my sleep meds don't work, I had a massive panic attack in the middle of a train station (couldn't breathe properly and move and stuff) and just sobbed on the floor for 10 minutes without anyone giving a shit about me and me continuing to cry for 3 hours after coning home.

Then I found out that we're being kicked out of our home soon and then I had a reeeaallyyy rough meeting with my boss which led me to cry for another 15 minutes at work (I was alone in the office at that point since I had so much work that I had to do ~10h of overtime despite being employed full time already).

Then when the week was finally over and I thought that it can't get any worse, my dad called me and told me that one of our cats died...

And finally, the only thing I was looking forward to all week, an online event in a game. I wasn't able to join because fuck if I know.

Life just hated me for 7 days in a row but I'm still standing. Probably because I did the best decision ever and took an emotional support plushie with me to work.

I'm still standing!

I should really get it out of my mind that I won't allow myself to be above 60kg. But I'm so glad that I'm not alone in this feeling <3

Thank you <3 I'll bring it up in my next therapy session. Probably a good idea

It does make a lot of sense that I need more energy...

Do you have any recommendations for not too unhealthy snacks? I'd go with cereal bars but they actually are quite sugary/unhealthy and hella expensive :/

The Braun Silk-expert pro 5, probably the most expensive and best reviewed IPL device out there

Too bad that all fish are 2589547453km away....

Probably the most affirming expriance I've had was when a new neighbor moved into our small apartment building and we got into a little bit of a chat. Some when in she asked me "oh, you're -neighbor with female name-, right?" I was, in fact, not that neighbor. What makes it specifically special was that I haven't done much as in voice training and my voice usually gives away that I'm born male. I still try to sound as androgynous as I can but it's reeaallyy hard.

Since that story is quite boring, here are 3 other affirming stories:

At an anime convention, I went into the men's bathroom to wash my hands and apply more black lipstick. Back then (and even now), the ladies bathroom almost sounds like sin to go into for me (thank you dad). To appear more fem, I wearing a very short skirt and a crop-top. It worked so well actually that some guy opened the bathroom door, saw me, IMMEDIATELY apologized and walked back out. He did come in again after looking at the bathroom sign and asked but ya. It felt so good finally not fitting in a space I was forced into for my entire life so far.

A second public bathroom story ٩(•ᴗ•)۶. I was in Cologne (Germany) for a day because of a small event in the Bootshaus. On our way there, me and a friend of mine had to go to the bathroom, so we decided to go at the bathroom of the train station Köln messe/deutz (we went separately and guarded our baggage and stuff). In any case, I walked in and someone instantly saw me and told me to get the fuck over to the ladies bathroom. The scared little bitch that I am, I just put on my male voice and said that I sadly had to go here... He left me alone after that but still very funny and affirming.

And finally, a non-bathroom related story. Literally 3 days ago, coming home from a Pride parade, a train ticked guy asked me for my ticket. Since I've just been on a pride parade, I was dressed quite fem and slutty. Anyways, I gave him my ticket and ID. THE FACE OF THAT POOR GUY AS HE GOT VISABLY CONFUSED WHEN SEEIBG MY NAME AND OLD PIC. It was amazing. Nothing really happened and h didn't question it and just left me to my ways.

What makes all of this even more euphoric of me tho is the fact that I'm not on HRT yet. I do have strangely high natural estro level which might have made me grow up quite a bit fem too. I guess I'm kinda blessed with the f1nnster gen, where I can look both quite masc and quite fem c:

Did you talk to your doctor about it not doing anything? It might very well because you're getting too low if a dosage. (DON'T INCREASE WITHOUT SUPERVISION THO!!)

I can't really judge if it's actually doing nothing or if you just can't see the change since it's a very slow and gradual process.

Holy shit, how didn't I know this exists? This is an amazing recourse. Thank you so much for this

Trans femme / A-gender gurl here to assist your data!