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submitted 1 week ago by FirstMajesticComet to c/egg_irl

Today we're making a post explaining the Egg prime directive here because a lot of people aren't fully aware of what it means and a few people haven't been following it. Today We will clear up some misconceptions about the egg prime directive. Explain why it is important, and also clarify that compliance with it here and on blahaj.zone is absolutely obligatory.

What is the Egg Prime Directive?

According to genderdysphoria.fyi the Egg Prime Directive is an "unspoken agreement between trans people not to tell people who are questioning their gender whether or not they are trans." I have also heard it compared to the Prime Directive in Star Trek which is a rule prohibiting interference with the development of alien cultures. While we think these are great starting points they are flawed in that they lack the fine details a code of rules should. There's a lot of fuzziness and uncertainty around it and what is or isn't acceptable under it. Which is why we are here today. We are going to explain the nuances of the Egg prime directive as well as add our own very much desired amendments to our version of it to ensure that this community is a safe and respectful place towards all, questioning, trans, or otherwise.


Egg Prime Directive Details

On genderdysphoria.fyi they state that if a person is explicitly told they are trans it opens up ground for denial, it activates mechanisms that trigger internalized transphobia and make people psychologically resist and dismiss gender dysphoria. This is 100% true, but it does not tell the whole story, and leaves out quite a few of the negative effects of what can happen if people of any gender identity are called or accused of being eggs, or coerced to identify a certain way.


When people get called Eggs

The experience of being told by someone else that your gender is wrong, that you're an egg, that your trans in denial can be extremely jarring or disheartening for many people, cis or trans. Depending on the situations it might even be scary or torturous. Some of the people who engage in so-called "egging" know how to take advantage of this and ask leading questions or taunt people in these situations who clearly aren't comfortable. Contrary to what certain political figures have stated, such interactions will not turn a person trans or cause a trans person to stop being trans. They will also not "deeply confuse" people into getting gender affirming treatments. However Egging itself can cause psychological confusion, it can cause mental distress and make people doubt themselves. They may if they are trans slip further into denial, like what genderdysphoria.fyi said. If they are a cisgender person who is Gender-Nonconforming, they may doubt themselves or feel something is wrong with themselves for the way they identify, the way they present, or both combined. They may feel self-hatred. When Egging involves people who are nonbinary or genderfluid these effects can be made much worse, as most forms of egging are directly invalidating to the experiences of Nonbinary, and genderfluid people. In short there are a whole host of negative psychological effects associated with egging.


What is and isn't "Egging"

There is a lot of confusion (some of it intentional misrepresentation) on what is and isn't considered egging. Some people choose to believe it is lighthearted humor, others more disingenuously believe it is the act of explaining trans issues to a person.

Here though we are sharply and clearly defining Egging as:

The act of badgering, insisting, or telling a person that they are an egg, or trans in denial due to an expression of mannerisms, clothing, or other presentation that does not match traditional gender stereotypes of the gender they currently identify as, or their apparent assigned gender at birth (AGAB).

Additionally actions meant to imply or insinuate this conclusion, or imply or insinuate disbelief in the person's gender identification on the basis of their expression of mannerisms, clothing, or other presentation that does not match gender stereotypes of the gender they identify as or their apparent AGAB, are also considered egging.

Finally, we consider any outward actions that refuse to acknowledge or respect the way a person chooses to identify themselves as indirect egging. As well as presumption that their identified gender is wrong.

While this may not account for every possible scenario a person has been called an egg in violation of the Egg Prime Directive, it is the one of the most common ones that happen.

Some examples include but aren't limited to:

  • Calling a gender non-conforming person an egg for wanting to have characteristics more in line with the opposite gender or be more androgynous.
  • Calling a person an egg for playing a character in a video game with a gender or sex different to their own.
  • Calling a person an egg for behaving or committing an action that goes against gender stereotypes.

Some people might consider telling another person that a person is or might be trans in denial to not be egging or to be permitted by the Egg Prime Directive, however we do not consider it to be. As it makes a presumption about a person's gender different than how they identify, thus invalidating it. As well as an attempt to change people's opinions about said person and/or the way they are treated by those people. Thus it is a violation of the Egg Prime Directive.

To sit down and offer support to a person explain to them the nature of gender identity, talk to them about your own gender identity. About what it means to be trans in general is not considered egging, and does not violate the egg prime directive. In fact this is considered supportive and affirming behavior.

To use the term "Egg" to describe your past self prior to coming out or identifying as trans is not a violation of the egg prime directive. It is the intended usage of the term.


Why does this matter?

The Egg Prime Directive matters because in a community dedicated to be a safe space for questioning people, people must feel safe to question. It also must be a safe space for anyone who is gender nonconforming, including many trans and nonbinary people. The act of Egging makes a space unsafe for these people, it means they have to tread lightly to avoid saying the wrong thing. It means their gender identity is up for questioning and debate by other people, and that is not a recipe for a safe space for people to question their gender and receive support and affirmation. In all likelihood spaces like that will lead to the opposite.


Enforcement of the Egg Prime Directive.

In Egg_irl it is obligatory that you follow the Egg Prime Directive. Violations are not permitted, under any circumstances. People who are found to be violating the Egg Prime Directive, excuse blatant violations of it, or encourage others to violate or otherwise not follow it, will receive moderator action. In all cases the offending content will either be removed entirely, or it may be locked as a public demonstration. Depending on the severity the offending user may be banned temporarily or permanently from the community.

Users permanently banned for violation of the Egg prime directive will also be entirely excommunicated from the egg_irl community. This may seem harsh, but since reddit.com/r/egg_irl has been all but destroyed by egging, it is necessary to maintain a safe space here. Do not violate our trust and faith in you and it will not be an issue.


Closing thoughts

While this was a bit of a long one I hope I was able to get across the importance of the Egg Prime Directive to people. I hope I was able to help people understand the kinds of behaviors that are unacceptable.

If you have any questions or feedback you'd like to add, please leave a comment. If I explained something wrong or if something came across wrong to you please let me know so I can hopefully correct it.

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submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by rubythulhu to c/egg_irl

Hey everyone.

I've been a little swamped in my personal life lately, and when I checked in this week it I've seen a few things that worry me.

Some of you may know that this community is one of the ones that replaced an old subreddit after the api stuff. There were some rules there that aren't so explicit here in our rules. I'll be working on rewriting the rules in our sidebar soon, but I want to make a few rules clear:

  1. This community exists to support people questioning their gender. Be kind and respectful if you're going to comment. I've seen some mean, hurtful, or angry comments posted here in the last little bit. Don't bring that energy here, a lot of people come here to get away from hurtfulness. We will remove comments and dm you privately.
  2. IT IS NEVER OKAY TO CRACK SOMEONE ELSE'S EGG. Many of you have likely seen the post that inspired this rule clarification and this whole post. I won't link it here, but this isn't just an egg irl rule. genderdysphoria.fyi calls it "The Egg Prime Directive". People need to find and define their own journey. We can tell our own stories, but we cannot dictate the stories of others. This is obviously a zero-tolerance rule, and is definitely ban-worthy. Absolutely not allowed here.
  3. Do not invalidate other people's experiences. I've seen this in at least one post, something along the lines of "i don't think this necessarily means anything about gender". Here's i'd like to refer to the rule #1 of !adhd@lemmy.dbzer0.com: (Rule 1). Basically the entirety of this post applies; there are some aspects of questioning your gender that may seem mundane to an outsider. This does not mean that the person who posted this experiences it in the same way as you. And, for some of us, things that felt mundane to us before too took on a whole new and deeper meaning as we found our way on our journeys.
  4. We still have a title rule. Please follow it. This is a tradition of egg irl from the reddit days. We could at some point reconsider this rule, but I still believe it is a good one as I summarized in a post here. This one I'm more lenient on. If you break it, I will post in your thread and politely ask you to edit your title, and either forcibly rename it or just remove it only if the author doesn't fix it. In the future, I would like to even automate this part with a bot.

As I said, I will be working on a more official stickied rules post, and updating our sidebar rules to reflect as well, but I felt it important to post these for now. I owe understanding of myself to the original egg irl and I want this to be similarly helpful for other eggs.

All of that said, I'd also like some mod help here. A few things I'd want from potential mods:

  1. you have a local lemmy.blahaj.zone account.
  2. under that account you have a history of posting here / other lgbtq+ communities positively
  3. that if you become a mod, you also make sure to get set up with matrix so you can be in the blahaj.zone matrix's mod chat channel along with me.
  4. i'd also prefer cracked eggs only; the mods here should consider themselves protective roosters & mother hens, nurturing and guarding our precious lil eggs <3

Please post here if you'd like to be considered, I will be choosing a couple of mods carefully.

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egg🐢irl (slrpnk.net)
submitted 17 hours ago by compostgoblin@slrpnk.net to c/egg_irl
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egg👩‍🎨irl (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
submitted 1 day ago by TotallynotJessica to c/egg_irl

This is just my personal experience and not a universal statement in any way

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egg🚊irl (lemm.ee)
submitted 4 days ago by dipshit@lemm.ee to c/egg_irl
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egg👗irl (discuss.online)
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Egg_IRL (sh.itjust.works)
submitted 4 days ago by BomberMan9865@sh.itjust.works to c/egg_irl





TranscriptionI was made as a war machine


war machines... ...and civil robots...

...were made at the same factory

from almost the same parts


NO WONDER they got

a few circuits connected wrong

in my infinitely complex brain


We spend some time on the second line

learning to be our kind


and as we learned, we were getting stronger... tougher... more powertful...

more of our kind


but something felt wrong

All those weapons. Armor. My whole purpose


I thought, I'm not trying hard enough...

I've tried more guns, More Power!

more dirt, grease, and rust...

I felt so disgusted and empty, i was barely able to function.

I hoped some enemy will end it for me


I was lucky to try another path

less danger, more civil look

It felt good for the first time in years

but it was still not enough

took me a while to realize

I was not a WAR MACHINE

I just served as one

but it could've been changed


I knew it would be a ling journey

but it was a journey really worth making


Rebuilding my outer body seemed easy

but took a long time...

It was really hard to get rid of things like rust.

Some things will stay FOREVER

Gun placement left empty space on my head

Wrists are too wide for the same reason

but still...


I was made as a WAR MACHINE

but it never meant I should end up as one


Because no matter how much people say,

HOW DIFFERENT WE ARE


We were made on the same factory

from almost the same parts

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egg💅🏻irl (slrpnk.net)
submitted 5 days ago by compostgoblin@slrpnk.net to c/egg_irl
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Egg_irl [Transfem] (i.imgur.com)
submitted 5 days ago by dipshit@lemm.ee to c/egg_irl
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egg👗irl (slrpnk.net)
submitted 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago) by compostgoblin@slrpnk.net to c/egg_irl
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egg💅irl (discuss.online)
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Egg❤️irl (gregtech.eu)
submitted 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) by lena@gregtech.eu to c/egg_irl
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egg♂️👗irl (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
submitted 1 week ago by FirstMajesticComet to c/egg_irl

How to get out of an uncomfortable egg culture situation with this one simple trick.

Real talk: Calling people eggs is a violation of the egg prime directive, and is considered invalidating as you are trying to say that a person is not the gender they identify as, that their identity is invalid. Don't call people eggs, like ever, it's extremely uncool.

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egg🏷irl (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
submitted 1 week ago by TotallynotJessica to c/egg_irl

Shavepost to maintain the balance 🗿—>🪒

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egg💘irl (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
submitted 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) by TotallynotJessica to c/egg_irl

Crack your rival :3

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Egg😰irl (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
submitted 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) by TotallynotJessica to c/egg_irl

When you start the decade as cishets, only to end it as transgays

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egg🧞irl (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
submitted 1 month ago by lolola to c/egg_irl

my cis friend helping me shop for gender-affirming care for the first time: a scene from the cartoon movie "Aladdin" where Genie helps Aladdin pick out a sultan outfit

I've never made a meme about my masc buddies so hopefully this came out ok

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Egg👩‍🏫irl (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
submitted 1 month ago by TotallynotJessica to c/egg_irl

For those harsh moments of lucidity that break through the armor and pierce your heart.

For me, the cute moments of playful experimentation couldn't quite penetrate my denial, but they did weaken it enough for the strong hits to make it through. I would quickly try to block and repair as best I could, but the structure was compromised and couldn't hold like before. All these hits came from myself; from actually considering that I could be trans

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egg_irl [transfem] (lemmy.world)
submitted 1 month ago by Kimmie@lemmy.world to c/egg_irl

a timeline of a cartoon "boy" progressively becoming more and more feminine. as the timeline progresses the caption changes from "gifted kid" to "burnout" to "trans girl with a praise kink"

this hits a bit too close to home...

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egg🍓irl (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
submitted 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) by Porygon to c/egg_irl

Don't ask me how many deaths my main save file has

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Egg:.|:;irl (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
submitted 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) by TotallynotJessica to c/egg_irl

My favorite loss meme so far!

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egg💊🎅irl (discuss.online)
submitted 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) by Blazingtransfem98@discuss.online to c/egg_irl

Christmas without HRT is just Cis-mas

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Egg_irl (lemm.ee)
submitted 2 months ago by dipshit@lemm.ee to c/egg_irl
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egg (lemmy.dbzer0.com)
submitted 2 months ago by TeraByteMarx@lemmy.dbzer0.com to c/egg_irl
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egg🦷irl (lemm.ee)
submitted 2 months ago by dipshit@lemm.ee to c/egg_irl
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egg_irl — Memes about being trans people in denial and other eggy topics

3482 readers
178 users here now

!egg_irl

!egg_irl is for widely relatable memes about questioning one's gender or being an egg (a trans person in denial) as well as other eggy topics.

If you are looking for a place to discuss something specific to you or especially if you need help or are in crisis, we have communities and resources that can support you linked at the bottom of this sidebar.

General Rules:

  1. No bigotry.

  2. No spam, bots, or vote farming.

Rules on Content:

  1. No reposts.

  2. No personal-life posts, bingo cards, quizzes, selfies, "trans/not trans" lists, picrew, or non-memes.

  3. No visible names or usernames.

  4. Do not post or link to pornography.

Rules on Post Titles and Tags:

  1. Posts must be titled "egg_irl". An emoji or two is OK, but they have to be between "egg" and "irl".

  2. Posts that assume the viewer's gender and/or contain potentially triggering content must be spoilered and tagged at the beginning of the post title. Example content-warning tags that you can copy include the following:

    • [CW: Assumes Viewer is Transmasc]
    • [CW: Assumes Viewer is Transfem]
    • [CW: Assumes Viewer is Nonbinary]
    • [CW: Transphobia]
    • [CW: Violence]
    • [CW: Weapons/Firearms]
    • [CW: Disturbing Imagery]
  3. You may optionally include other tags, such as:

    • [Transmasc Meme]
    • [Transfem Meme]
    • [Nonbinary Meme]
    • [Gender-Nonspecific Meme]

Rules on Post Text:

  1. If possible, include an image description for accessibility.

  2. Add sources for art.

Rules on Comments

  1. If a post is tagged with a specific gender identity, keep the conversation centered on that identity.

  2. You must follow the Egg Prime Directive. You may not push or coerce people into identifying or not identifying a certain way. You must respect them as the gender they claim to identify as. In addition it is extremely in poor taste to make assumptions about other people's identities based on external factors, we understand it cannot be helped but it is best not to as it can affect the way you treat others in noticeable ways.

  3. No Ewwphoria posts. Posts which contain misogyny, misandry, transmisogyny, transmisandry, or enbyphobia for the purpose of expressing euphoria are not allowed here. At best they bring anger to others, and at worst they may trigger people's dysphoria. People who create such posts will have them removed and may be banned at moderator discretion.

Recommendations:

We strongly encourage you to include your pronouns in your account bio so that others know how to refer to you without misgendering you. If you're questioning or unsure of your pronouns, that's totally cool—just say so.

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Community Resources:

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