That sucks, but how the fuck does Atlassian have 16,000 workers to begin with? What do they all do? And their products look like... Guestures at all of them
You've got an extra digit there
No he doesn't. The redundant 1,600 are only 10% of the workforce. 16,000 total.
You know what? That makes a lot of sense.
Their products are utter garbage to begin with, this can only hasten their well-deserved demise.
"Uh, we need you to clear out your desk ASAP."
"Sure, just submit a JIRA ticket and I'll get right on it."
It's even worse than that: it'll be a ServiceNow ticket.
Somehow, HR processes are always exempt from the ticketing process.
And yet oddly (and predictably, and likely disastrously, etc. -) some HR departments are among the very first to glibly upload their (our) everything's into constantly shifting unreliable AI "products". Not speaking hypothetically 😐
Funny stuff, that.
Our HR critters use a case-management system, badly. They have an internal process, but never adapted the default workflows to match it. So the pendejitos are always trying to clean up self-inflicted gunshot wounds to their feet.
JIRA and Bitbucket are so bad that even Microsoft Azure DevOps (that is a reskin of the decade old Visual Studio Online, which itself is a reskin on the two decade old Microsoft TFS) is somehow better than it. And everyone loves to hate on Microsoft products.
Are there any actually good enterprise grade Task tracker + Code repo combo that we should be suggesting the execs migrate to? Maybe the GitHub Enterprise product?
My org just rolled our own project management tool that matches our workflow now.
AI-washing layoffs. They will replace jack shit with AI but that's a better story than "we have to reduce costs because we don't have cheap ways to refinance our $1B debt".
Credit isn't cheap and Iran is not going to make it cheaper, investments in software have tanked, so the only story that can still be told with an almost straight face is that they still have big growth opportunities thanks to the magic of AI.
There is a Jira ticket (ID-240) for Atlassian requesting the ability to merge Atlassian accounts that is over 10 years old. I'm one of the 1,450 watchers. This news does not bode well for this ticket ever getting implemented.
Hodgepodge.
AI will vibecode that into production in a week. And to make it all easier..it'll have merged your account with 10 competitors too so you know what they're working on!
well the good part is you don't need to merge those accounts anymore
"AI is too dumb to take our jobs" as if that matters. that's not even the point, the point of Generative AI is to mine data and devalue human labour. according to the like 120 people who run this world too many people are making too much money so now we have a dogshit "technology" made to cut your wages whenever it's convenient.
Atlassian is getting thrashed in the stockmarket and they're using AI as a get out of jail free card to conduct massive layoffs.
Its too bad that in the end they are just making forgettable tools that jira aside already have extensive competition, that actually feel built for enterprise vs the garbage atlassian is making.
If it wasn't for the army of agile cultists who claim that work is impossible without Jira they'd probably already be a much smaller company.
They will rehire for less. The AI hype is just a wage suppression scheme.
My employer has been axing so many high level engineers it's not even funny. I think that's terrible for engineer morale. Why would you want to strive to improve and get promoted if it just makes you "too expensive to keep on payroll"?
I’m amazed they had 1600 employees to begin with. I guess it takes a lot of resources to make something suck as hard as JIRA
3 coders and 1597 managers.
Who else is going to put the sidebar as top bar, and then switch them back a couple years later?
They renamed "project" to "space", so that it's harder to find what you are looking for.
They renamed "ticket" to "work item" to "issue". (We all still call it a ticket)
Stories? Events? Kanban?
Fuck you, I need a text box, date field and some box to tick that says I'm done.
All this so that some VP with their thumb up their ass who spends 2/3 of the year in Florida knows I'm working!
They renamed “ticket” to “work item” to “issue”. (We all still call it a ticket)
Those three terms all mean different things.
Yet they can sponsor an F1 team.
Good, someone has to think of the poor race car drivers, and their million dollar team.
Of all the shitty AI products flooding the market right now, Atlassian's Rovo has got to be the most useless I've had the misfortune of using.
They should be hiring more workers to fix their AI slop, not replacing them with even more of it.
Trying to get Rovo to do things in JIRA is like trying to train a chimp to cram shit back into an elephant’s ass.
It’s not because of their garbage AI. It’s because their garbage AI is leading to people dropping them like a bad habit for open source and fucking Microsoft alternatives, so they need to reduce operating costs and CAPEX to demonstrate profit growth
I FUCKING hate jira with a passion. I swear to god that dumbfuck software is nothing but a miserable time sink.
I am sorry for the people who got laid off. Also there is no way AI is replacing the CTO….
Them and Salesforce can both be Thanos’d out of existence, pretty please
About 6 months ago they spent more than half a billion acquiring The Browser Company whose only currently-being-developed product is a pretty wrapper for ChatGPT
That explains the explosion of unwanted AI features in Jira these days. No, I don't need you to re-write my fucking ticket comment!
We have https://codeberg.org/ as an alternative to Bitbucket, and you can have free public static pages like Netlify or Github pages.
Codeberg also offers private repos.
Yet everyone helps feed this AI beast. No one thinks... Maybe I'm helping this through my data.
this post helps to feed the AI beast
there’s no escaping it; let’s not do with AI what we’ve done with CO2 and plastic and shift blame to individuals
I agree. However we are feeding it not through the data, but through $, subscriptions and data minng.
We have a choice to renounce the subscription to meta, OpenAi, yet we dont.
Atlassian now circling the drain.
We can only hope so.
I've suggested to my team a few times that we should start a new business developing "Atlassian, but good". They're up for it. So many of our wider business have never used "anything but Jira", and they can't see it for the steaming pile of shite that it is. Not just that it's a bad tool for developers, QE, project management or customer support, but they couldn't imagine anything that's better in any way, or how it would look if it didn't have so many issues.
So you telling me Jira and all its related bullshit will get even worse? I hadn't thought it possible.
The biggest surprise in the article is that Atlassian is not profitable. How? They pretty much have a monopoly in the Jira-like space (look , I can't even think of a generic name) and they charge a hefty sum for their products. How tf do they lose money?
The article lists an insane revenue of $1.6B, yet the losses are only on the order of $42M in the last 3 months. Against that much revenue, it looks to me like they are managing the company at a slight loss on purpose. They probably could close that gap if they wanted to, but have some favorable tax implications or something by running that "slight" loss.
(And who knows, maybe this is part of the attempt to close that gap and show a profit before the founders cash out and it all gets sold to a Shittier company)
Quite disappointed in him. Always thought he was a reasonable character but using e-mail is such a slap in the face.
Oh boy, guess we can look forward to more vibe-coded slop which will make it an even bigger pain to use.
TBH Atlassian was already such terrible slop, unsupervised AI might even make it better
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