I hear this a lot from young women, "there's just no pleasing my mother". I cannot offer words of wisdom or comfort, but I can promise you this. I will try my hardest to please your mom, as I always do. 👍
Just need to apply some cunning linguistics.
What's interesting, "-lingus" in cunnilingus and "lingua" are actually connected. "Lingua" used to be "dingua" but then mixed with the verb "lingo" (I lick) because, well, tongues do lick.
Also both dingua and lingo are cognates to English toungue and lick.
Anyway sorry for being boring!
If you get down there and really work that clam anyone can please their mother.
Don't sleep on nipple play.
I'll suck on them things like I was a starving baby again.
I will try my hardest to please your mom, as I always do. 👍
this is like that time I told my brother in law "Don't worry, I'm not doing anything to your sister your dad wouldn't approve of".
This is when we were trying for a baby
Sometimes being 100% honest is the most chaotic thing you can do. The contrast between her question and that answer is pure comedy gold.
I am convinced that violet8 is the single most horny poster on Lemmy now... which is fine... because I am entertained by your posts.
Nah, she just has an NSFW humor type of sense of entertainment.
I humor everything, matter of survival of course. I don't want to be a bad thing.
i love big fat cocks in my mouth and am still a lesbian lmao
RIP your inbox
having known a lot of sex workers and lesbians we need, societally, to engage with that some people enjoy giving blowjobs and that this doesn't invalidate their sexual preference to be with women
How YOU doin?
Sarah, a big fat cock strapped to a girl still makes you a lesbian. It's okay!
A big fat cock that the girl was born with is still lesbian.
Maybe she's mad at you for girldick erasure
You can’t win them all
Charlie Sheen has entered the chat
That's cause mom is a lesbian.
What about perfectly average cocks?
A very rich cock would be perfect.
Can't please everyone
Not with that attitude you can’t
Plot twist: She meant male chickens
In the immortal words of Super Hans:
Would you like a parrot?
Ah that's right, you'd probably like a Cockatoo
That's not even correct...
Oi Mrs C, answer me this - Have you ever had a parrot?
Err... No
It's just you look like you'd enjoy a cockatoo
Yeah. But I was in charge of the quotes, Tom. I drew a line, you crossed that line.
I'm going to have to have a think about you. I don't think you can be trusted in a combat situation.
I am bi so the lgbt is no biggie to me but to my parents it is. I have not told them yet
Did you had a pause between "way" and "I"? I presume not since there is no comma "no way, I like"
when you wrote this comment did you think the original op was going to see it
Walls have ears. It'll propogate through the grapevine, and her cheeks will be red they will. And covered in jizz.
I do not give lemmy permission to use my photos or my personal data
your comment does not have gold fringe i only recognize the authority of the admiralty courts
i also had a pause at no. like a big one. valley girl style
Damned if you do damned if you don’t
I bet she's got legs like a bowl of cereal
Soggy?
No, full of moose hair and elephant semen. What the hell kind of cereal are you eating?
i was gonna say chunky and with pockets in it why you got moose hair in your pockets
Totally happened
Damned if you do…
With that pfp I would also doubt their answer
On a scale of 1-yes, how alone are you?
Yes. Feel free to to go to the bathroom at the back of the place (surely you aren't going to be using that to scope out the place).
Yeah, because - as everyone clearly knows - one's propensity to enjoy sucking cock can be determined directly from their profile picture on any given social media site.
Brilliant.
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