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With high speed internet coming out at exactly the same time as my sex drive developed, I have probably seen more nude women than every human in my direct ancestry.

If not combined, I definitely have the high score for now.

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[-] HuntressHimbo@lemmy.zip 262 points 2 months ago

By not having kids, you could cement your place as #1 titty seer of your bloodline

[-] hansolo@lemmy.today 53 points 2 months ago

Turns out that there's a curse on humanity that if you see more than 800 boobs in your life, your chromosomes self-destruct. But we've never had data to figure out all out.

[-] HuntressHimbo@lemmy.zip 21 points 2 months ago

I wish it need not have happened in my time," said Frodo. "So do I," said Gandalf, "and so do all who live to see such times. But ~~that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us.~~ it could be a lot worse than death by titties

[-] Eq0@literature.cafe 8 points 2 months ago
[-] hansolo@lemmy.today 11 points 2 months ago

Nope, only applies to boobs. A curse wouldn't seek to deny innocent people medical treatment.

Poor mamogram techs, though. Between the radiation and the boobiation... rip.

[-] Goodlucksil@lemmy.dbzer0.com 8 points 2 months ago

800 boobs, even if only counting naked and from a real person (no AI, no drawings) is a low low number, and even skipping porn most pimps will have seen that number in their lives.

[-] errer@lemmy.world 6 points 2 months ago

I saw 800 boobs just last night. 800 is rookie numbers.

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[-] ceenote@lemmy.world 8 points 2 months ago

Are you saying parents can't have porn addictions?

[-] PapaStevesy@lemmy.world 40 points 2 months ago

I think they just meant that having a kid opens it up so you might not stay #1.

[-] FinjaminPoach@lemmy.world 27 points 2 months ago

Genuinely couldn't figure out what HuntressHimbo meant 😅

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[-] HuntressHimbo@lemmy.zip 14 points 2 months ago

No I more meant that OP could keep their lead perpetually by not having kids who could top them.

[-] TheFunkyMonk@lemmy.world 7 points 2 months ago

Adding this to the list of benefits to being snipped.

[-] danciestlobster@lemmy.zip 78 points 2 months ago

I hear an alarming large number of people can trace their ancestry back to Genghis Khan and I am not sure you have him beat. Maybe though

[-] yermaw@sh.itjust.works 54 points 2 months ago

Oh i forgot about that guy. Its a closer match-up than i thought.

[-] cenzorrll@piefed.ca 10 points 2 months ago

Also, mammals evolved around 300 million years ago, and being generous, clothes were first used 3 million years ago. So the number of generations of your ancestors who didn't see tiddies everyday is a rounding error to the number who did. And they were ALL successful *vaguely waves in your direction*

[-] Squirrelsdrivemenuts@lemmy.world 7 points 2 months ago

But during the "walking around naked" times people tended to live in small communities, whereas we have access to thousands of naked people online everyday.

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[-] tigeruppercut@lemmy.zip 13 points 2 months ago

I dunno, even assuming Ghengis had sex every day and his proclivities leaned toward having multiple concubines sent to him at one time, that still doesn't necessarily equal the number of different people someone could cycle through during a session of flogging the bishop. Someone with a high libido could easily pass Khan these days.

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[-] ordnance_qf_17_pounder@reddthat.com 77 points 2 months ago

We've seen more naked ladies, but touched less.

[-] 5ibelius9insterberg@feddit.org 74 points 2 months ago

I only ever touched one naked lady. That was 16 years ago. I liked it so much, I never touched another one. She seemed to liked being touched by me too and never left.

[-] PapaStevesy@lemmy.world 40 points 2 months ago

Really hoping this isn't a joke about your mom...

[-] 5ibelius9insterberg@feddit.org 123 points 2 months ago

Not at all, it’s a joke about your mom.

[-] PapaStevesy@lemmy.world 43 points 2 months ago
[-] Viceversa@lemmy.world 19 points 2 months ago

So you two are father and son! So cute!

[-] usualsuspect191@lemmy.ca 17 points 2 months ago

In fairness, your mom's so fat it's difficult not to touch her

[-] Blackmist@feddit.uk 5 points 2 months ago

Especially if your grandparents were swingers.

I could have done without knowing that but there we are...

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[-] Hello_there@fedia.io 47 points 2 months ago

Should have been a gynecologist.
30 min appointments.
40 hr weeks.
80 vaginas per week.
4160 vaginas per year.
Some repeats per year, probs, but not all. Maybe 3000 more per year?
20 year career.
61,000 vaginas.

Of course that probably ruins all joy out of seeing them. But that's a best in bloodline amount of puss.

[-] FlashMobOfOne@lemmy.world 32 points 2 months ago

As a working artist, can confirm.

Seeing nude people for work is less fun.

[-] TexasDrunk@lemmy.world 15 points 2 months ago

I had a part time gig DJing at a strip club for a brief time. It gets old much quicker than people think.

[-] GenosseFlosse@feddit.org 16 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Some of them will be from healthy, slim 20 year old girls, but some will be from the opposite end of the spectrum 😐

[-] Nastybutler@lemmy.world 15 points 2 months ago

Or speculum, you could say

[-] entwine@programming.dev 8 points 2 months ago

Blue waffles are a lot more common than you might assume

[-] jballs@sh.itjust.works 9 points 2 months ago

But that's a best in bloodline amount of puss.

Lmao I'm dying over here

[-] Semi_Hemi_Demigod@lemmy.world 27 points 2 months ago

Counterpoint: We used to exist without any clothing and saw naked ladies all the time. And naked dudes. And even gasp naked children.

[-] danciestlobster@lemmy.zip 27 points 2 months ago

Yes but also probably not a ton outside relatively small tribes so might still be low numbers

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[-] PiraHxCx@lemmy.dbzer0.com 25 points 2 months ago

But did you see them IN PERSON? How good is your score now, uh?

[-] yermaw@sh.itjust.works 42 points 2 months ago

I'm definitely tied for last place unless theres some blindness along the way...

[-] Eq0@literature.cafe 8 points 2 months ago

Or some ultra-Christian middle age stuff against nudity even in the bedroom

[-] johsny@lemmy.world 6 points 2 months ago

I live in a naturist resort, (nudist colony) so I still win, probably.

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[-] tinyvoltron@discuss.online 14 points 2 months ago

Are we talking 400 different women or just 800 total boobs in different situations? This is an important distinction.

[-] CarbonIceDragon@pawb.social 13 points 2 months ago

To be fair, any currently living but older relatives will have had the ability to access high speed internet for just as long as you, but also time with older forms of media as well.

[-] justsomeguy@lemmy.world 12 points 2 months ago

In the yearbook of your bloodline after the entries for greatest warrior, wisest thinker, kindest soul and many others there will be you, top gooner.

A long unbroken line that dies in a million fruitless nuts.

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[-] paraphrand@lemmy.world 8 points 2 months ago

Men too :smart:

[-] abbadon420@sh.itjust.works 7 points 2 months ago

It's about quality, noy quantity

[-] BlackLodgeCooper@lemmy.ml 4 points 2 months ago

We're about to have some quality quantum-titties in the future.

[-] JerryMerweather@piefed.social 7 points 2 months ago

I unfortunately watched porn too, and I regret every second I wasted watching porn.
Supported sex trafficking without even knowing, and ruined my life with it.

Not proud of what I did, I am disgusted.

[-] GottaHaveFaith@fedia.io 8 points 2 months ago

That's why I only jerk off to hentai tentacles porn. My conscience is immaculate, god itself will welcome me into heaven. I am ready.

[-] paraphrand@lemmy.world 5 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

People don’t like to look at this dimension. They just like to talk about how seeking out porn is natural and normal for teens. I’ve seen a few people around Lemmy make this claim as an argument against doing anything about how we handle pornography in the modern world.

They don’t want to consider the fact that unfettered access to porn from puberty impacts how a whole class of people engage with the world, and with others. Impacts how they socialize, how hard they try in seeking out partners. Etc. It’s a deep subject that just gets dismissed for a variety of shallow reasons.

[-] JoMiran@lemmy.ml 6 points 2 months ago

Your parents:

[-] FinjaminPoach@lemmy.world 4 points 2 months ago

With high speed internet coming out at exactly the same time as my sex drive developed

What percentage of all the naked ladies publically posted on the internet do you think you've seen?

[-] yermaw@sh.itjust.works 8 points 2 months ago

Probably close to 0%. Theres a fuckton

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this post was submitted on 22 Feb 2026
426 points (100.0% liked)

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