Maia, he?
Maia, hoe.
Maia. Ha ha.
...
WHEN YOU LEAVE MY GANDALF TURNS TO GREY
Puts a new meaning to hobbit hole.
What season of Rings of Power will this subplot be in?
Fuck, that makes more sens then it should.
That's why he's so pissed at Pippin all the time. He's an embarrassment to the family ๐
Might also be why all the other older hobbits dislike gandalf. They fear he is after their ladies
He's oversized, overpowered and over here.
"I am not trying to rob you; I'm trying to fuck you."
Wonder what Tolkien would have made of all these fan theories.
Wrong.
Some of Tolkien's specific inspirations were the Germanic Sagas, including the Nibelungenlied and Volsunga Saga.
A theme of both is that heros are often descendants of the Aesir, specifically Odin, and Gandalf is patterned after Odin to an undeniable degree, a wise and enigmatic warrior-mage often depicted as grey cloaked, proficient in rune lore, carrying a staff or spear.
Not only that, Gandalf means elf with a stick, and a common theory for his origin among the men that knew he lived longer than mortals is that he was literally just an elf.
Tolkien may or may not have specifically intended it, but he'd certainly agree that you could read it that way with the influences he drew from, and it is also a special point of his Middle Earth (aka Midgard btw) that the history they tell isn't necessarily the history that happened. The hobbits having forgotten that it was Gandalf banging GranGran Took or mistaking him as an elf isn't just a likely theory, it's a probable one. Further, we also know that Maia WILL marry and have children from some of his other histories.
Or not, and it was just an elf who died or returned to Valinor, with Gandalf just keeping an eye on the line! He's tricky like that.
I think that is a literal storyline in Belgarath the Sorcerer. The wizard, Belgarath, spends thousands of years monitoring and manipulating various family lines. One of those is a line of dryads who are tiny and all female. He was "forced" to mate with them or they would kill him with bows, but he didn't really complain about it. He is able to avoid these "conflicts" in the future after discovering chocolate makes them orgasm.
Some times you don't think about how weird this shit gets until you explain it to someone else.
Some times you don't think about how weird this shit gets until you explain it to someone else.
Every anime ever
Were the dryads 10,000 year old 12-year-old girls?
I hate this aspect so much. Like, bro, can't you just make cool cartoons without sexualizing the characters?
Or just make the sexualised characters slightly more age appropriate. Gimme hot moms in their 30s or something
Everything in life is directly or indirectly about sex. We're literally machines "designed" for the purpose of procreation, i.e. sex. Just makes sense that all our stories are about it as well :D
While one can squint hard to see the connections to procreation with enough steps in between, that doesn't mean everything should be sexualized. Working a farm to produce food food is necessary for one to live long enough to reproduce, but farming isn't about sex.
Every single fertility god and goddess throughout history is giving you the side-eye right now.
Plant sex
The Lord of the rings memes communitiy on Lemmy. Share memes about Lord of the rings and be respectful.
