328
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[-] Feathercrown@lemmy.world 8 points 1 day ago

Creativity = Killing everyone by taking great liberties in interpreting spells

[-] NigelFrobisher@aussie.zone 1 points 16 hours ago

To me, this just raises all sorts of questions about how magic works, mechanically speaking, in this setting. Does this only work on water in a container (which is not really a thing scientifically speaking) because that’s the consensus of what practitioners believe it can do? Was the spell designed like this by its inventor?

[-] DeathsEmbrace@lemmy.world 14 points 1 day ago

If it destroys water you have ions destroyed with the solution so no salt. Because it's a part of the water. If you did destroy the water then you would get sodium and chloride plasma because it's ionized.

[-] explodicle@sh.itjust.works 8 points 1 day ago

The plasma is why the magic glows.

[-] Allero@lemmy.today 11 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Which is probably fine since, at this temperature, it will immediately convert to solid salt, albeit maybe with some impurities should some ions react with something else.

[-] Aurenkin@sh.itjust.works 61 points 2 days ago

If I cut someone do they count as an open container?

[-] tdawg@lemmy.world 30 points 2 days ago

If someone opens their mouth do they count as an open container?

[-] Feathercrown@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago

Their intestines might, but not their lungs. Lungs are more liek a sponge

[-] Tolookah@discuss.tchncs.de 36 points 2 days ago

Nope, people are tubes, not containers

[-] atomicbocks@sh.itjust.works 30 points 1 day ago

90s Tube Squeezy Toy

Yeah, people are like these tubes specifically.

[-] Derpenheim@lemmy.zip 20 points 1 day ago
[-] TheSlad@sh.itjust.works 8 points 1 day ago

Actually those things are not that fuckable, because they roll along your penis instead of sliding. There is very little sensation other than cold squeezing.

🤷🏼‍♂️

[-] idiomaddict@lemmy.world 10 points 1 day ago

A tub with a plugged drain is the bottom is a container. Anyone wearing a buttplug is therefore a container.

[-] tdawg@lemmy.world 12 points 1 day ago

That explains why water falls straight through

[-] festnt@sh.itjust.works 12 points 1 day ago

i will get to a level where i have as many slots of destroy water as possible, and i will spend the rest of my life casting destroy water on the ocean, until it is completely dry. is that something i'd be able to do, or is that not possible? (i play pathfinder, not d&d, so i don't know)

[-] sirblastalot@ttrpg.network 1 points 3 hours ago

After awhile, Poseiden comes and kicks your ass until you stop. Live by the magic sword, die by the magic sword.

[-] SkyezOpen@lemmy.world 23 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Assuming a level 20 druid, you'd have 32 slots 1 or above, 2 gallons per caster level so 40 gallons per cast, that's 1,280 gallons per day or however fast you can regain spells. A bit shy of half a million gallons in a year. A particularly long-lived elf could destroy 280 million gallons before keeling over.

Now it depends how big the world you're on is, but if it's earth-like, the smallest ocean on earth is... 4.9 quintillion gallons.

4,900,000,000,000,000,000

So while you wouldn't make a dent, a character with an irrational war against the ocean is hilarious and you should do it anyway.

[-] festnt@sh.itjust.works 2 points 17 hours ago

wait wait wait

could i just kinda put a stick on the mouth of a bag of holding and throw it in the ocean? (the stick is for keeping it open)

then i could throw a bunch of those in the ocean, and it'll at least help destroy it.

if this works like i think it does, i'll get something that lets me craft bags of holding, and i'll just spend the rest of every day (after casting destroy water) crafting bags of holding to throw into the ocean

also, don't worry about age. i am going to become a lich like someone suggested, so that i can just stay there, destroying the ocean very, very slowly, forever.

and please correct me if anything i said isn't possible!

[-] SkyezOpen@lemmy.world 3 points 16 hours ago

For the amount of money you'd waste throwing bags into the ocean, you'd probably be better off hiring people to cast destroy water.

[-] Witchfire@lemmy.world 1 points 16 hours ago

Bags of holding are not infinitely sized, just big

[-] Doc_Crankenstein@slrpnk.net 11 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

So, the problem isn't how much water but how much time?

Become lich, be immortal, problem solved.

Now it's a race between you and the heat death of the universe or pissing off some God of the Sea for fucking up their backyard.

[-] sleeplessone@lemmy.ml 2 points 19 hours ago

Umberlee definitely wouldn't be a fan.

[-] festnt@sh.itjust.works 1 points 17 hours ago

aww yeah that's the best option. whenever i play d&d (if ever) i'll see if i'm able to get a druid and end up doing that

[-] enerhpozyks@eldritch.cafe 2 points 1 day ago

Maybe the duid can team up with a lvl 20 wizard that will open a Gate with his 9 lvl spell slot from the bottom of the ocean.
Dunno how to do the math, but a 20 feet diameter sink in the ocean opened in the sky of another plan for one minute may be faster (in spell slot economy) than lvl 9 destroy water.

[-] SkyezOpen@lemmy.world 3 points 1 day ago

open a gate... Bottom of the ocean

How do you feel about goblins, by the way?

[-] enerhpozyks@eldritch.cafe 0 points 1 day ago

@SkyezOpen I think I miss a reference because I don't see any connection, sorry :/

[-] SkyezOpen@lemmy.world 1 points 15 hours ago

Goblin slayer reference. Someone does that to kill a big bad with water pressure.

[-] Gladaed@feddit.org 36 points 2 days ago

"free" shit costs a spell slot, you know?

[-] Lembot_0004@discuss.online 30 points 2 days ago

Free() can destroy the world. Believe me. I know. I am a C programmer.

[-] hddsx@lemmy.ca 15 points 2 days ago

This is why I free nothing and only malloc().

#WhoNeedsMemoryManagement

#JustDownloadMoreRAM

[-] Lembot_0004@discuss.online 7 points 2 days ago

You're sick with Java-Python Syndrome. The only cure is C++. But you're too old to master C++ before you segfault. Muahahahahaha!

[-] hddsx@lemmy.ca 7 points 2 days ago

You know, my biggest gripe with python isnt abstracted memory management. My biggest grip is duck typing

[-] troyunrau@lemmy.ca 9 points 1 day ago

Duck typing is my favourite. Pry it from my cold dead (object that appears to be hands, and probably is, but maybe isn't).

[-] exu@feditown.com 4 points 1 day ago

At least it's strongly typed as well unlike JavaScript.

[-] Lembot_0004@discuss.online 3 points 1 day ago

duck typing

Script languages are very nice for writing pre-100-lines long listings. Where you can keep all types in your head. Consider Python uber-bash. Unsuitable for anything else, though.

[-] tdawg@lemmy.world 7 points 2 days ago

Shut up and getting castin' wizard. These biscuits ain't gonna season themselves

[-] riwo 22 points 2 days ago

i can use create/destroy water on blood to get iron for my weapons?

[-] Tar_alcaran@sh.itjust.works 26 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

Bloodplasma is mostly water, but blood is only about 55% plasma. Unsurprisingly, your blood actually has a LOT of stuff in it, like red blood cells.

Unless you want to count water in cells, but that would do the stuff that the spell doesn't do.

[-] MyTurtleSwimsUpsideDown@fedia.io 10 points 2 days ago

Turn beer into moonshine!

[-] MyDarkestTimeline01@ani.social 9 points 2 days ago

I cast destroy water on the fluid lining of his brain.

[-] Stamets@lemmy.world 17 points 2 days ago

That would fall under the first part of this meme. You cannot see the fluid lining of his brain unless it is exposed in which case I feel like there's a far easier method of murder.

[-] Gaspar@lemmy.dbzer0.com 11 points 1 day ago

You cannot see the fluid lining of his brain unless it is exposed

I would like to submit, as a counterpoint, the Ring of X-Ray Vision from the 2014 5e basic ruleset.

Soooo... Destroy Water, please, Mr. DM.

[-] Stamets@lemmy.world 14 points 1 day ago

Once again, this still falls within the first part of the meme as it violates the spells wording of "open container". If you're using X-Ray vision to see the brain then the brain is within a closed container.

Soooo... No, Mr. Player

<3

[-] Feathercrown@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago

Don't forget that most bodily fluids are almost certainly not water

[-] MyDarkestTimeline01@ani.social 3 points 2 days ago

It wouldn't be (instantaneous) murder though.

[-] lutehero@piefed.social 5 points 1 day ago

Oh shit, that means I can a bucket of salt into free sea water.

[-] Allero@lemmy.today 4 points 1 day ago

Could you threaten the salt vendor with that?

[-] phase@lemmy.8th.world 4 points 1 day ago

Salt? Wait... sea warer can also contain so much more like magnesium. A perfect component for... explosive... with water...

[-] SuperNovaStar 4 points 1 day ago

sea water wouldn't be containing elemental magnesium, it would contain magnesium salts.

this post was submitted on 26 Aug 2025
328 points (100.0% liked)

RPGMemes

13399 readers
845 users here now

Humor, jokes, memes about TTRPGs

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS