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spoiler
For people that don't know this is not how you use Calipers
Wow! That's a creative way to use a caliper.
That's why teaching children about metrology basics is so important.
I remember when I first applied for a job in a fabrication/machine shop. One of the questions in the interview was "Do you know how to read a tape measure‽" followed by "demonstrate that you can use a tape measure" along with some other fun ones like "what is the difference between these two pieces of material" (one was aluminum, the other stainless) and other such things. I remember being surprised/disappointed that there were grown people who couldn't read a tape measure.
I've worked in machine shops and drafting offices for years now, and I'm no longer surprised by people who can't use basic measuring tools. Still disappointed though.
There's a great test for programmers called FizzBuzz. It's an extremely easy task - print some numbers (maybe 1 to 100), but replace them with Fizz if they're divisible by 3, by Buzz if they're divisible by 5, or by FizzBuzz if they're both.
Many reasonable people consider it way too easy - if you can write this, it doesn't mean that you can write complex programs, or that you know the applicable languages, or that you know anything about the business domain.
But interviewers know that it's a great test because a lot of so-called programmers still fail it.
We did a fizzbuzz interview with a candidate. He passed but I had a weird feeling about it so we asked him to do another one with 7 and 21 and he couldn't do it even with his old code right there
Damn, dude managed to literally memorize code without having any idea of what was going on. Meanwhile, I'd spend most of my time trying to figure whether it's div or mod that i'm supposed to use to check for the remainder of a division, I always forget which is which
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OK - now I'm curious, what were the most common mistakes people made reading a tape measurer? Because I'm having trouble working out how someone could screw that up lol
We had a guy we called "10/16" (ten sixteenths) because he was told to grab some 5/8" (0.625" or 16mm) steel plate, but he couldn't find any he could only find 10/16" and 12/16".
People will count the little lines on the tape and not remember if they are 1/32, 1/16, or 1/8.
I think metric would help this.
Oh OK - that does make a bit more sense. Still not exactly Nobel prize material, but fucking up the fractions at least makes more sense than not knowing how to read numbers and count lines lol
Metric would help with everything lol. I dream of the day we finally make the switch
Yeah, fractions are dumb. Or I’m dumb and fractions are easy, but why don’t we split the difference and switch to metric?
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Some people dont know why the metal bit riveted to the end moves...
Or they even say this is a sign of wear and means you should throw it out.
And because I enjoy sharing knowledge more than boasting I know more than others: the reason it moves is to account for the thickness of the metal hook itself.
It makes a difference if you are hooking it onto the back of something and measuring from there, OR butting it up onto something and measuring from there.
If you want accurate and consistent readings in both of these situations, the hook has to move. It basically pivots around the true point you’re measuring from.
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Measure twice cut once is a saying for a reason.
If you already knew this expression, here is chapter two:
Account for the width of the blade.
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At least for me, that has more to do with misremembering what I measured than mismeasuring it
Can't count how many times I the workshop I measured something, made a mental note of it, walked back to the workbench, only to have to walk back and remeasure it because now I've forgotten what I just measured lol
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“what is the difference between these two pieces of material” (one was aluminum, the other stainless)
Did they expect you to identify which metals they were, or just that they were different metals?
I was expected to know that one was stainless steel and the other was aluminum, but not the specific grades of stainless or aluminum. Stainless and aluminum can look very similar when they're dirty, and 300 series stainless won't stick to a magnet just like aluminum won't stick to a magnet. But if you pick them up or even rap on them with your knuckles you can tell the difference.
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I want to wholeheartedly believe the caliper has the size the customer wants and the pipe is bigger, therefore inappropriate. I've never met anyone who would use a caliper this way, I've seen people trying to eyeball it or use it as a ruler but not like this
Oh jeebus fucking christ. Sometimes the dumb hurts and then you get the existential dread knowing you're about to have to call this moron. And, even better, they usually make more money than you.
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So these guys are smart enough to read Vernier calipers, but dumb enough to measure like this?
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Anyone who works with clients can appreciate this one
please close and reverse the tool, then grip it tightly and drive it into the skull of the complaining customer
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Next time, chose a smarter client.
They don't exist.
Bold claim, also very true
I am a certified blithering idiot and even I feel like a high society intellectual compared to this picture.
Showed this pic to my co workers (steelworkers/blacksmiths) and only the old guys knew what was funny about the pic... Gen z think that calipers are toy guns.....
I use calipers frequently and didn't realize it was upsidedown until reading this.
I thought it was a joke about clients always sending shitty low resolution pictures where you can't actually verify their claim.
Oh, I thought the joke was that the hole the customer was complaining about was the hole this pipe was supposed to fit into, and that they were measuring the inner diameter rather than the outer.
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I dunno, a lot of gen z and millennials probably use them when fabricating parts for things that you can't get them for. I know I do for my printer.
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Two of them did this.
Just for the fun of it: i'm making it 3 in my head. 1 extra to take the photo.
Probably. And not one said "hey, thats not the full dimension of the hole".
Judging by this, even if it's the right size, they'll probably install it wrong anyway, so why bother?
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A normal set of calipers has 3 basic modes of measuring things: inside, outside, and depth. It is amazing to me how many people in this thread don't know at least one of those or use them wrong.
Til the calipers I use, almost daily, can measure depth. Now I'm less annoyed about the stick protruding from the end lmao
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Tbf I use mine daily and had to pause a second thinking what would be the third mode. (never use it to measure depth)
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They were trying to design a caliper holder that fits the jaws in that orientation, obviously. They need to fix this, send it back.
This just tells me calipers should have 2 measuring bars on them, so gaps and other inside edges can be measured like this (maybe this already exists, idak)
Just flip it, the top bars are for measuring from the inside.
That's what the two prongs at the top are for. Flip the caliper upside down, use the prongs to measure the inside dimension, and read it off the same scale.
Ah cool, didn't notice those. Cheers
“Caliper jaws for inside measurement—I thought of that. Turned out it already existed, but I arrived at it independently."
I think the guy was actually referring to something a bit different, that is having a second number scale on the caliper that is offset by the width of the first jaw, so you can use the outside jaws for measuring inside dimensions. I don't think that would work, however.
The second scale sounds like a good Idea till you mess up everything due to using the wrong one. I once had a Spirit Level that was for plumbers and had a Second bubble-level built in that was even when the Level was tiltet to about 1.5 degree, great for waste-lines and gutters. Now everything in my House ist tilted by 1.5 degree except the plumbing and gutters.
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Can't tell if I'm missing a joke here, but see those two small knife looking protruding from the opposite side (above) where they're measuring, those are used for measuring internal diameter.
The side they're using is for outer diameter.
And though you can't see it in the pic, the thin bit of metal that extends out from the bottom can be used for measuring depth.
TIL what the thin bit is for. Thanks
Probably not because I would have said the same thing. I know nothing about tools.
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Looks like that hole chamfer is wrong. Doesn't properly fit the measuring device.
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this post was submitted on 22 Aug 2023
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