359
Bidet anyone? (lemmy.ml)
submitted 10 months ago by uberstar@lemmy.ml to c/memes@lemmy.ml
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[-] PotatoesFall@discuss.tchncs.de 89 points 10 months ago

When people think a bidet is stupid, I always ask: If you had poop on your arm, would you clean it with water or just wipe it with a dry towel and call it a day?

Not to mention it's less irritating for ur bum

[-] Daxtron2@startrek.website 42 points 10 months ago
[-] swab148@lemm.ee 10 points 10 months ago
[-] bhamlin@lemmy.world 12 points 10 months ago

Hey, that's mine. You can't have it.

[-] swab148@lemm.ee 9 points 10 months ago

🥺👉👈

[-] tigeruppercut@lemmy.zip 17 points 10 months ago

This question shows that people can have differing standards of cleanliness and it's OK. Because the answer is "would you spray your arm with water only or would you use soap?" Bidets don't use soap, so with either bidet or paper you can still feel dirty until a shower, it's just what level of dirty you're willing to accept.

load more comments (1 replies)
[-] MeetInPotatoes@lemmy.ml 9 points 10 months ago

Hey, fellow Spuds fan. I have a similar one but it's: "If you smeared peanut butter on the outside of a watermelon but wiped it off with dry toilet paper, wouldn't you expect it to still smell like peanut butter?

load more comments (10 replies)
[-] mub@lemmy.ml 8 points 10 months ago

You still have to wipe though, right? Using just water to clean it off your arm would still leave a stain. You have to make contact to rub away what remains somehow.

I've used a few bidets and while it was fun and they did an ok job there was no soap involved and I still had to wipe. I don't hate them, they make some sense, but a bidet is not magic.

[-] cmbabul@lemmy.world 19 points 10 months ago

I’ve used a bidet for a decade and the only reason I have to wipe is to dry off

[-] mub@lemmy.ml 7 points 10 months ago

Only if you have a solid one. If your poo is sticky it leaves a smear and even high pressure water won't shift, and that's when you need a wipe.

[-] dessalines@lemmy.ml 15 points 10 months ago

You've never used one and it shows.

load more comments (13 replies)
load more comments (2 replies)
[-] PotatoesFall@discuss.tchncs.de 6 points 10 months ago

If the pressure is right u should be able to get everything, but yeah even then you need to dry it.

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (15 replies)
[-] davel@lemmy.ml 76 points 10 months ago

Three seashells and a poop knife was good enough for my pappy and my grandpappy and his pappy before him, and it’s damn well good enough for me & my sons.

[-] UniversalFlamingo@lemmy.world 14 points 10 months ago

I wish I could upvote this twice.

[-] randomuser38529@lemmy.world 7 points 10 months ago

Gifting mine in your name, I got your back.

load more comments (2 replies)
[-] Cyanocobalamin@lemmy.dbzer0.com 43 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

Wouldn't recommend. I bought a Kärcher brand one some time ago, it had too much pressure. Got my butt cleaned to the bone though.

Edit: I appreciate the advice about pressure, but folks, I was joking about power washers 😆

[-] frostysauce@lemmy.world 12 points 10 months ago

I come for the clean bum. I stay for the surprise enema.

[-] Rai@lemmy.dbzer0.com 9 points 10 months ago

My bidet BLASTS my bits and I love it. I’m ALWAYS bits-clean.

[-] olafurp@lemmy.world 7 points 10 months ago

You need to use the valve to adjust the pressure. They're also not all the same.

load more comments (10 replies)
[-] Sundial@lemm.ee 40 points 10 months ago

Such a huge difference in cleanliness when using these.

[-] Ioughttamow@fedia.io 11 points 10 months ago

Everytime I travel I wonder how the godless savages live like this

[-] Sundial@lemm.ee 6 points 10 months ago

A lot of middle eastern countries have these at hotels.

load more comments (1 replies)
[-] AuntieFreeze@lemmy.world 17 points 10 months ago

Bidets fuck hard.

[-] Imgonnatrythis@sh.itjust.works 10 points 10 months ago

Sorry. You are all primitive peoples if not using a toto.

[-] davel@lemmy.ml 15 points 10 months ago

i mean if your bidet doesn’t even have wifi what are you doing with your life

[-] abfarid@startrek.website 8 points 10 months ago

I grew up in a Muslim country and I hate these. They are always either too strong or too weak. And they somehow always leak (no idea why).

Wet wipes ftw.

[-] SkybreakerEngineer@lemmy.world 31 points 10 months ago

Just remember that there is no such thing as a flushable wet wipe. Even the ones that say they are.

load more comments (2 replies)
[-] B312@lemmy.world 17 points 10 months ago

All I hear is skill issue

load more comments (3 replies)
[-] InstructionsNotClear@midwest.social 7 points 10 months ago

I highly recommend the rinseworks bidet. It is designed much better than the one from the pic. You don't have to shove your entire hand in the toilet to use it. https://rinseworks.com/

[-] Got_Bent@lemmy.world 7 points 10 months ago

I know Europe loves to shit all over the US on this topic.

Unless I'm sick, well over 95% of my poops take place immediately before I shower. I don't really see how this is any different.

[-] eyeon@lemmy.world 22 points 10 months ago

it sounds like you understand the value of using water to clean your butthole after you poop.. so why not spend the $30 on a bidet just in case you ever do have a poop and don't want to shower? or hell just so you don't use as much TP before hopping in the shower. or for anyone else using your toilet and not wanting to hop in the shower..

[-] SsxChaos@lemmy.ml 18 points 10 months ago

So basically everytime you take a poop you have to shower..

You mean to tell me that you rather wash your whole body every single day once or twice wether it's summer or winter wether you left the house to do any activity or stayed at home all of this commitment just so you don't give in and use a bidet. God Americans y'all are so special.

[-] Got_Bent@lemmy.world 13 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

I mean to tell you that I'm that regular. Once in the morning and I'm done until tomorrow.

And yes, I wash my body every single day. Are you telling me the paragon of asshole cleanliness that is Europeans doesn't?

God Europeans are so eager so shit on all of us. Is it the orange monkey we elected? Is that what did it?

[-] GrammarPolice@lemmy.world 9 points 10 months ago

What happens when you take a shit away from home?

[-] SsxChaos@lemmy.ml 6 points 10 months ago

I believe they looks for a fountain ⛲ or a 💨 river in some woods while hunting ducks to shower so long as they don't wipe it's all good same shit with measurements anything is a measurement tool unless if it's in the metric system

load more comments (1 replies)
[-] OneWomanCreamTeam@sh.itjust.works 5 points 10 months ago

Owning a bidet isn't going to do anything for you when you're shitting outside of the house tho.

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (5 replies)
[-] MewtwoLikesMemes@lemmy.world 6 points 10 months ago

I'd love to buy a bidet. I just can't afford it.

[-] Taleya@aussie.zone 29 points 10 months ago

$20 for a bolt on unit that fits on your seat, even cheaper for a bum gun. Live your dreams

[-] hanrahan@slrpnk.net 10 points 10 months ago

Bum gun now for 20 years after visiting SE Asia decades ago and relealising smearing shit around your ass with paper really was just fucking weird

DIY install for about $20 and no TP.

[-] hswolf@lemmy.world 8 points 10 months ago

a bum gun, lmao

load more comments (3 replies)
[-] LemmyHead@lemmy.ml 8 points 10 months ago

There's tops you can buy really cheap that you can put in a bottle and have a very cheap bidet. I think for many people it's a struggle to change their mind that this is also OK and it doesn't have to cost thousands of $$$

load more comments
view more: next ›
this post was submitted on 30 Aug 2024
359 points (100.0% liked)

Memes

51575 readers
970 users here now

Rules:

  1. Be civil and nice.
  2. Try not to excessively repost, as a rule of thumb, wait at least 2 months to do it if you have to.

founded 6 years ago
MODERATORS