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Transfem
A community for transfeminine people and experiences.
This is a supportive community for all transfeminine or questioning people. Anyone is welcome to participate in this community but disrupting the safety of this space for trans feminine people is unacceptable and will result in moderator action.
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Some helpful links:
- The Gender Dysphoria Bible // In depth explanation of the different types of gender dysphoria.
- Trans Voice Help // A community here on blahaj.zone for voice training.
- LGBTQ+ Healthcare Directory // A directory of LGBTQ+ accepting Healthcare providers.
- Trans Resistance Network // A US-based mutual aid organization to help trans people facing state violence and legal discrimination.
- TLDEF's Trans Health Project // Advice about insurance claims for gender affirming healthcare and procedures.
- TransLifeLine's ID change Library // A comprehensive guide to changing your name on any US legal document.
Support Hotlines:
- The Trevor Project // Web chat, phone call, and text message LGBTQ+ support hotline.
- TransLifeLine // A US/Canada LGBTQ+ phone support hotline service. The US line has Spanish support.
- LGBT Youthline.ca // A Canadian LGBT hotline support service with phone call and web chat support. (4pm - 9:30pm EST)
- 988lifeline // A US only Crisis hotline with phone call, text and web chat support. Dedicated staff for LGBTQIA+ youth 24/7 on phone service, 3pm to 2am EST for text and web chat.
this is an interesting question. i'm transmasc and a little over five years since coming out and starting HRT. i'm also pretty old (for the internet, anyways), so i had lived a life while presenting female - i have a lot of experiences, memories, friends, ect from that time period
i never had dreams where i was a man, pre-transition. even nowadays, sometimes i dream and it uses my past self concept as a woman. it was a little surprising to realize i had dreams where i was a man, actually (which would have probably been a few years after i transitioned). but it varies, and i don't put too much stock in it. it was hard enough for me to figure out that i'm a man, i don't hold it against my dreams or whatever. and, conversely, it doesn't bring me a ton of relief if i have a dream where i am a man, because i am one when i wake up, and that's all that matters to me
in a lot of ways though, when i dream, my essence is that of myself, with the traits that i largely identify as - not male or female, but rather, determined, persevering, and intent on finding truth. these define who i am much more than my gender, in my dreams
all that said, the question about self concept is the hardest one for me to answer. i feel like an entirely separate person - albeit one who has the memories of another person's lived life - and, in a way, the same heart. however, there is a definite break between where she ended and i began, which was marked by the moment i realized that i'm trans. so i don't really know how to answer that, maybe it's a slower and less traumatic experience for others? i had to forget everything i had learned, i had to rediscover who i was from scratch. in doing so, i realized that many things i attributed to "who i am" were much more tenuous than i had previously believed
but i think that's a good realization, to know that you'll still be yourself no matter what changes. it frees you to grow as a person, without clinging to notions of who you were or who you should be
no matter what you need to do to survive or blend in, no matter what body you have, don't forget or doubt yourself in your womanhood
i might have had more to write, but i'm too sleepy and thought it would be better to write this out before i forgot. i'm looking forward to reading more of the responses in this thread later though