HRT has changed my perception of my own gender (self.mtf)

submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by undercoverkobold to c/mtf

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I've been admittedly struggling with my identity as a whole, especially as I approach my 1 year mark on Estrogen. So far it's the right call for me, but I've discovered that I'm becoming more comfortable with my masculine traits and even find myself binding my breasts that I've waited so many years to have, while the next day I'll do the complete opposite and present femininely.

I feel like I have no consistent sense of self and often have a hard time even knowing what's going on in my head haha

Constantly trying to figure out if I'm a boy, girl, both, or neither, because I admittedly struggle with my body in various fronts. One day I'm too feminine, the next I look too much like a man, or I'm not androgynous enough.

Frankly, it's exhausting. I used to think I was just a woman but it doesn't seem to fit as I continue hrt.

It feels odd to express all of this but, I've not really talked to many trans people as I'm chronically shy. Is there anyone who can relate to what I'm going through?

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[-] undercoverkobold 17 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

I've considered it admittedly, I think I'm just worried about push back from others I know.

Add in a little bit of denial and imposter syndrome as well and that's me rn

[-] Bluefruit@lemmy.world 8 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

As long as you are upfront about your feelings and patient with those around you, i don't think you have anything to worry about.

Those who care about you should understand. Its tough not knowing who you might be or what makes you comfortable.

I haven't gone through what you're going through but ive known people going through transitions and as long as youre being nice about it and being patient, im sure those you know will care about you all the same.

Most importantly you just gotta find what makes you comfy. Whatever that is.

this post was submitted on 18 Jul 2023

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