443
If you’re happy (lemmy.world)
submitted 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) by 64bithero@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world
all 29 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[-] dreadbeef@lemmy.dbzer0.com 41 points 2 days ago
[-] MeatPilot@sh.itjust.works 12 points 2 days ago

I CRANKED MY HOG MULTIPLE TIMES TODAY BROTHER, BUT I STILL GOT MORE! ARRROOO

[-] Plastic_Ramses@lemmy.world 6 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

I TRIED TO DO WHAT IT SHOWED IN THE PICTURE BROTHER BUT NOW IM IN THE HOSPITAL WITH A VICE GRIPS LATCHED ONTO MY SWIM SUIT AREA.

AUNT GRETA ISNT GOING TO LIKE THIS ONE

AROOOOOOO

[-] aldhissla@piefed.world 6 points 2 days ago

I CAN'T HEAR YOU, BROTHER! AROOOO!!!

[-] Thunderwolf@lemmy.world 5 points 2 days ago
[-] kinkles@sh.itjust.works 35 points 2 days ago
[-] MasterNerd@lemmy.zip 2 points 2 days ago

I tend to do that when I'm sad

[-] kmartburrito@lemmy.world 22 points 2 days ago
[-] Pat_Riot@lemmy.today 4 points 2 days ago

Easy there, this is a family friendly comm.

[-] SpiffyPotato@feddit.uk 16 points 2 days ago

Vice your gammon…?

[-] massive_bereavement@fedia.io 15 points 2 days ago

And you call them clamped hams despite the fact that they are obviously plated.

[-] lime@feddit.nu 6 points 2 days ago
[-] Emptiness@lemmy.world 1 points 1 day ago

Kan du va själv!

[-] gigastasio@sh.itjust.works 5 points 2 days ago

If you’ll all excuse me I’m gonna go “clamp my ham” if you get what I’m sayin… winks knowingly

[-] Mpatch@lemmy.world 4 points 2 days ago

Dick in a vice?

[-] FUCKING_CUNO@lemmy.dbzer0.com 5 points 2 days ago
[-] SubArcticTundra@lemmy.ml 4 points 2 days ago

Last time someone pinched polska they got bombed by the British

[-] JamesBoeing737MAX@sopuli.xyz 1 points 1 day ago

Not because of that.

[-] JamesBoeing737MAX@sopuli.xyz 1 points 1 day ago

Not because of that.

[-] rizzothesmall@sh.itjust.works 1 points 1 day ago

Secure your gammon

[-] Sibshops@feddit.cl 4 points 2 days ago

Squeezy your charcuterie

[-] farmgineer@nord.pub 3 points 2 days ago

ハムを治まる?

[-] Daze@sh.itjust.works 3 points 2 days ago

Clasp your Ham

[-] Steve@startrek.website 2 points 2 days ago
[-] Syltti@lemmy.world 13 points 2 days ago

"Clamp your hams" is my guess.

[-] sit@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 2 days ago

..put your clamped meat loaf slice on a plate with Mediterranean design.

[-] Vandals_handle@lemmy.world 2 points 2 days ago
this post was submitted on 22 Aug 2026
443 points (100.0% liked)

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