Imagine your name is Cathy Lou and the barrista reads that as a blasphemous gurgle that is impossible to produce with human vocal cords.
the barrista reads that as a blasphemous gurgle that is impossible to produce with human vocal cords
I mean, isn't that how they already read ALL names? 🤷
I bet sitting in any Starbucks on the Klingon homeworld is a laugh riot.
"She calls you Payless! The Great House of Payless shoe discount Emperor, is honored!!"
That's how them mofuks always speak to me. WHAT AM I, A GNOLL?!
Yes I am very proud. I'm still learning I'll leave no HEY STOP PUSHING ME
We're pushing you to keep going! Well done!
I DON'T NEED YOUR PITY
😭
I will not let you consider this pity! This is praise of your skills whether you like it or not!
i am doomed
ę̷̡̛̭̝̳͚̲̻̣̹͎͎̪̳̥̫̣̳̰̙͎̜̥͓͔̦̣̞̰̣̅͗̍̐̆̎̆͗̇͛̑̆̐͌̉͆͂̉̔͛̈̍͒͛̊͛͛́̅̈́̽̊̕̕͜͜͝ͅa̴̻̘͙̘̫̦̯͕̙̯̯̲͖̗͖͚͖͔̤̠̦͖̭̱̘͂̍͆̓̏̈́̓͂͒͆͆̔̐͊͊̍͆̍͂̐̿̈̋̏͛̐͐̑͆͐́̄̕̕͘͝͝!̷̧̛̲̮̻̾̊̑́́̽́͑͑͒̑͐͘̚ ̸̛͖̳͕̱͖̬̭̪̹͇̖̦̞̦̠͉̼̩̩̏̀̅̌̀̒́̉͆͗̍̾̓͌͒̆̍͌͑̽̂͊͌̈́̽̈́̕̕e̴̢̬̭͙̮̠͈̜͈̝̤͖̋̈́̈́̀͛̇̓̂̒̑̂̎̑̂̓̏͒̏̉̏̈́̍̍͊̅̓͋̈́̀̇͒͊̇́̚͠͝͝ͅä̶̡̧̘͖͉̺̺͔̲̹̪̜̮̟̤̜͔͕͙̗̙̩͈̭̗͕̯̩͙̠̪͎͕͎̯̱͇̫͕̖̣̣́̓̑̈̽̅̃̌̏̓̍̏̂́͒́̽̈̈́̋͆͊͐̈̚͝!̶̧̬͍͔͔͎̣̤̫͉͈̗͙̣̬̫̼̘̞͚̟̩̫̝́͐̂͋̒̾̉̌̌̄͗̈́̇̎̓̑̇͊̒͑͑̄̅̒̐̐̐͗̌̓̎͒̈́̾͗͘̕͘͘ ̶̨̨̧͚̼̼͇̰̬͚̙̩̜͔̻͎̹̪̪͉̞̺̣͍̖̳̘͈̫͍̩̼̪͕͉͍͕͖͚͂̉̆͌͂̅̋̓̀̾̊̀͛͑̄̓̊͗̑̐͊͗̈́̽̾̎̀̌̈́̈́́͊̆̓̓͂͐̕͘̚͝͠ͅͅC̵̡̖̝̲̯̣̮̳̫͈̠̖̬̯̦̰̦͉͖̟̟̺̻̝̫͕̞͕̖̗̺̩͑̄̎̂̋̎̉̅̋͌̽̆͂̍́̋̚͠ͅȧ̶̡̢̭͖̥̟͚̗̘̣̮̭͕̰̩̠̯̻̣̻̣̭̅̾͗̑̂̾̾͒̀̈́̆̄̔̈́̐̍̒̚̚͘͜ͅţ̴̧̟̥̘̭̙̱͍̞̻͖̯͓̭̠̙͙͕̪͖̙͚̬̹͇͋̏̀̈́̽̄̅͛͌͒̾̍͂̕͝͠h̷̢̧̨̨̡̨̧̡̛̩̻̼̠̭͇̺̞͙̜̯̯͓̮͓̬̪̜̼̹̱͓̙̫͉̝̻̜͔̤̠̜̤̾͊̓̒̇̊̀̊̅̎́̐̇̎͑́̈́͑͗͊͗́̋́̌̒̓̎͛̋̈́̈́͗͊͊̄̀͌̔͗͜͝͠ͅy̷̡̨̢̛͚͇̭̱̝̝̦̠̼̖͈̻̝̘͎̤͖̗̘͕̺̦̖̭̽͌̔͆̉́̂̔͛̋̅͂͗́̀̀͒̾͐̏̕̚͘͘̚͜͠͠ ̷̢͉̥̱͙̤͉̜͎̫͕͕̣̙̭̼͈̯̦͊̃̍͌̍̾̽̓͒͛͑̀̽͊̆͌̀̏ͅĻ̶̢̨̝̠̪̳̭͕̥̣̹̰͍͉̬̞̱͖̦̜̟͉̜̽̎̉͋̎̉͗̊̆̍̉͋̀́̔͗͛́̔̽̈́̅̈͋̄̏́͂͛̾̅̇̂̀̌̋̈́̚̚̕͜͝o̴̢̙̣̦͚͍̱͍͇̐̔̇̀͑͋͆̔͒̾́͗͠͠ȗ̶̡̢̦̬͎͓͚̻̙̱̱͍̤̮̤͙̥̥͔̩̟̹̝̟͉̻̈̑̍͆̍̔̀͆̽͊͒̈́͆̌̌̾̀͐̈͜ͅ ̵̧̨̡̢̡̰̭̣͖̘̲̫̤̼̻͉̻͉͌́̽̈́̉̓̾̓̃̌̊̂͒͋͊̂͜͜͜͝͝f̴̧̯͇̣̭̙͍̥͚͙̪̹̜̘̠̖̪̣͚̭̻̜̩͉̗̦͓̜̹̟̮̟̹͉͍̭̬̠̲̉̌̽̌̀̈̈́̋́͆͂͒̌͌̚ͅŗ̸̢̛̛̯͉̠̰̤͉͔͚͍̞̠̞̜͉̹̗̳̞́́͒̏͆͛́̏̌̂̃̒̒̈́̀̏̐̾̽̈̓̈̑̉̚̕͝͝ȁ̷̛͈͉̬̣̥̺̞͔̯̈́͂̽̔̂̆̓̆̾̏̑̀̊̎̀̇̏̓͊̆̃̔̌͐̍͐̊̾̈͊̚̕͘̚̕͘̕̕͝͝͝t̴̢̡̖͇̖͖̙̬̹͕̮̤̲̦͙̻͍̤̙̘̜̖͖̬͚̂̉͋̐̽͋̊͐̐͜͜ͅą̵̢̨̧̡̛̟͍̲̳̝͈̞̦̭͕͔̺̼̞̤̯͍̩͎̜͓̭̠̻̱̣̺̤̲̠̗̆̉̉͂̐͑̏͑̎̌̓͛͛͑̓̈́̈̿̇͊̀̑̓͂̉́́̈̌̎̂̉̌̾̐̕͝͝͝ͅḩ̵̧̢̧̝̩̘̣̞̹̼̟̘̘̙̈͊͑̑̊͗̏͐̏́̉́̃̾̈͂̑͋͐̚͜͜͝͝͠g̶̢̨̡̨̧̨̮̘͔̺̘͖̺̺̤͕̭͚͔̣̟͉͙͙͕̪̗̰̰̣̜̳̣̎̈́͐͐͂̄͜͜n̵̢̢̨̢̛̥̥̝̝̳̬̯͍̠̖̞͕̺͔̩͕͚̞͖̰̣̯̹͍̩̾͑͌̎̇̄͑̌̐͛̓̇̚̚͘̕͝͠͠ͅ!̴̨̲̺̬̺̤͙̞̺̬̠̯̞͉̩͓͖̻̤͔͇͇̲̼̥͚̪͖͍̃͑͘̚̕͜͜͝͝ͅͅ
Hahahahahaha I literally can't see your comment because of the Zalgo text and it is magnificent
Edit: i take it back it sucks. :(
l̶o̵l̸ ̶s̷o̶r̷r̶y̶ ̸b̷r̶o̸
Wait now I'm confused. Are you Zalgo? I'm looking for a guy named Zalgo. He said he would get me and my friends in this joing.
Do you want the caramel cappuccino or not?
Cartwright but yet so Cartwrong.
You guys think Starbucks hasn't been waiting for Cthulhu's coming all this time to serve him? Black and green colors? That two-tailed mermaid? Yeah, that's Stæ'Rhabhuk, Holder of the Chalice and Slaker of the Dark Lord's Thirst.
I imagine His wet Highness takes his coffee with salted caramel.
In his house at R’lyeh, wide awake Cthulhu waits doomscrolling.
stop fucking buying starbucks tho, even that guy
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