245
choice
(sopuli.xyz)
Too complex. I somehow mixed 2 of them and lemm.ee died
I'll take two unretard.
Absolutely green. So many people would turn to shit that the remaining minority would ask if this was the rapture.
We'd call it getting green pilled
I take green and Start with all weapons on earth. Imagine the redneck waking up with poop under their pillow, poop on their walls and whole cabinets filled with poop. Fkin hilarious
All the new recruits in the army, literally polishing a turd, because theyre scared of the sergeant and dont know if this is a hazing thing or what
I think I would take turn anything into poo. Trump, Netanyahu, Putin and every billionaire would be instantly poo
Start with just the roof of their mouths.
Nothing changes.
For more petty cases, turn people's stuff or food into poo.
They're already pretty shitty
So it’s a fitting end
Can you add Kid Rock to your turn to poo list please?
Done
Then the Copromancer saved the world and never went on a vindictive pooing spree driven mad by his own unstoppable power, The End
Well I mean to be fair there’s a few vindictive pooing spree people in my own life. I was driven mad years by this dystopia ago so not to worry that ship has sailed
Clarification for green. Does it require physical contact or is it like a Death Note situation? If it's the former, don't we already have that ability? What about non-bio-based materials? If you eat a rock and poop out a rock, does it also now qualify as poo?
Green pill would be the best power, hands down, no contest. It would be a very, well, green superpower.
Demolition jobs all around the country, regular houses cost $4-8 per square foot. Underbid & you get every job. Old warehouses? Poo. Toxic landfills? Poo. Asbestos? Poo. Old tech waste that's processed for valuable metals first? Poo. Forever chemicals? Not anymore, poo. Radioactive nuclear waste that costs us $6B every year according to this? Get a government contract for $5B per year for 100+ years with unlimited paid travel/room/board for you & all your family, travel to all the storage sites & turn all the nuclear waste into poo. Travel the US. Travel the world! You're the Poo Man. Eliminating radioactive nuclear waste & creating fertilizer. Everyone would pay top dollar for your fantastic services. Getting old, sick of earth? Go to the moon, go to Mars, Mars can use lots & lots of nutrient rich poo to help terraform in the future.
There would be almost no limit to the amount of good you could do, with poo...yes, you can use it to rob banks. If you're fucking dumb. Or you could legally shake down & radically transform the entire world, make them pay you & your descendants like kings, and if they're smart they'll thank you for your services. Poo Man. All day, every day, you'd be the richest man on earth (or Mars) & arguably super super ethical, too. Win-win.
I wonder if transforming all the microplastics that are everywhere would improve or worsen everyone's health.
Boom, miniscule amounts of poo in your bloodstream
Probably improve. Not immediately, and don't go shoveling it into your mouth, but enough of the poop would have to be treated via simple exposure or a sewage plant.
City people tend to not really understand poop, waste management....give poop enough time, and a little care, it's fertilizer. Where I live, some of the soils are very very black. Very rich & fertile. It's the best soil. But what created that rich soil?
It was poop. Poop, pee, rotting biological lifeforms. It was poop, it no longer is poop, I bought this book a year & a half ago that details how to safely turn your own poop into sterile soil. There are many different methods, web search it.
I enjoy the benefits of society & modern plumbing, septic...but if/when everything breaks down....I want a good outhouse. I don't want to be sitting around like an idiot wondering, "Where does my poo-poo go without 1.4 gallons of water per flush? 🤔"
That depends on what exactly is the poo. If it's a poo of a living creature, it will be very not good, it's riddled with microorganisms, viruses, and bacteria that you really really don't want in your bloodstream. If it's an abstract idealistic version of poo than it might be better.
You show up at the capitol to turn Congress into poo.
It doesn't work, because they're already full of shit.
Netanyahu? instant poo. Trump, Putin? Instant poo. Turn shitty humans to shit and cut the middle man.
load more comments
(6 replies)
I can turn a lot of things to poo already tho, I just have to eat them first and wait a while
Do trump next please
Could I make Mars poo just to fuck up Elon's plans?
Just turn Elon into poo. Don't fuck with Mars.
Nah, I want to take his dreams away from him before I turn him into shit.
Let him land on mars first, then poo.
Green pill me you sick bastard.
The pill doesn't let you un-poo a thing, so you'd be destroying a whole planet forever just because of one dickhead, who'll be around for 34 more years maximum.
load more comments
(5 replies)
Green pill = infinite money cheat. Turn all the plastic trash, nuclear waste etc. into bio mass
Also gardeners and farmers would very much want poo. So first you get a deal where someone pays you to turn trash or such into poo, then when the poo dries up, sell it as fertillizer.
You could go the evil route and become a hitman as well, or rather a shitman, turning your targets into poo.
Just need to keep your talent a secret. Put on your mask, grab a shovel, turn all the walls between you and the bank vault to shit, take what you need and leave. Cops come, the bullets/guns/cuffs police left feet to poo. Wash the money figuratively once done cleaning it literally, then figure out your next step.
load more comments
(6 replies)
load more comments
(4 replies)
load more comments
(1 replies)
Im taking the black pill every time. I got a lot of retard to undo
You have become Derpenheimer, destroyer of retards
Black pill's gonna have some mysterious side effects with my other medication
Black pill. Please cure me of my ailments.
I would be un-fucking-stoppable as a normie.
When we say lifetime supply of thorium. Does it mean the receivers lifetime Or the thorium's lifetime???
load more comments
(3 replies)
Neurotypical pill pls
I need that unretard for sure!
Turn anything into poo: turn plastic waste into manure/fertilizer. Millionaire pretty quick. Could also become a supervillian.
view more: next ›
this post was submitted on 08 Sep 2025
245 points (100.0% liked)
Lemmy Shitpost
34396 readers
3779 users here now
Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.
Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!
Rules:
1. Be Respectful
Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.
Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.
...
2. No Illegal Content
Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.
That means:
-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals
-No CSA content or Revenge Porn
-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)
...
3. No Spam
Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.
-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.
-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.
-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers
-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.
...
4. No Porn/Explicit
Content
-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.
-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.
...
5. No Enciting Harassment,
Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts
-Do not Brigade other Communities
-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.
-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.
-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.
...
6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.
-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.
-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.
...
If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.
Also check out:
Partnered Communities:
1.Memes
10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)
Reach out to
All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS