753
I'm intrigued (piefed.cdn.blahaj.zone)
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[-] prole 18 points 6 days ago

What year is this, why would they continue arguing instead of just taking out a phone and looking it up?

[-] chetradley@lemmy.world 12 points 6 days ago

If I had to guess, she's curious to see how big of a hole he's going to dig himself into.

[-] rumba@lemmy.zip 9 points 6 days ago

A friend of mine got in a fight with his wife recently about the name of a bar that's long gone.

He and I had worked in the neighborhood and had been to the bar a dozen times and had been to the other bars probably hundreds of times. He had met his wife years later and had maybe visited the bar a couple of times before it disappeared.

His brain had played musical chairs with the bar name on the block. She was right. I had a rather strong distaste for this bar and generally refused to go to it, so I remembered it clearly.

He had intimate details of the lighting, the unusual concrete bar, the music, the seating, the people we had gone there with. But the names were transposed. He had been looking up tax records and property names trying to prove her wrong.

So first, he got in trouble for not believing her, then he got in trouble for trying to prove her wrong, then he got in trouble again for calling in a lifeline.

Meat-based data storage is weird AF.

[-] MechanicalJester@lemmy.world 4 points 6 days ago

Calamari? You mean like clown fish eggs?

[-] moseschrute@lemmy.ml 2 points 6 days ago

Happy cake day!

[-] Phil_in_here@lemmy.ca 139 points 1 week ago

What is this, a Seinfeld episode?

Jerry: "How'd the date go last night?"

Elaine: "Ugh, total bust! We spent the whole time arguing about calamari!"

Jerry: "Arguing about calamari? Like fried squid?"

Elaine gestures there you go

George: "It's deep fried, what's not to like?"

Elaine: "He doesn't even know what it is!"

Jerry: "Never had calamari? What a sad life..."

Kramer enters. Applause.

Elaine: "Kramer. What's calamari?"

Kramer: "Disgusting. That's what it is."

Jerry: "We're not talking about the same calamari here."

Kramer: "It's like chewing on rubber bands!"

Jerry: "You're not still going to Bosco's are you?"

Kramer: "I like Bosco."

George: "Didn't the health board shut them down?"

Kramer: "That's how you know it's authentic."

Elaine: "Can we get back to my problem, please?"

Jerry: "I'll tell you what, let's all go out. Elaine, you can bring you can bring your boyfriend. I'll show you all what calamari is supposed to taste like."

Elaine: "Well, do the have caviar?"

Jerry: "Caviar? What am I made of money? Why caviar?"

Elaine: "That's what he thinks calamari is!"

George: "Did you correct him?"

Elaine: "Yes, George, I corrected him. I corrected him for 45 minutes!"

Kramer: "Well why didn't you just order the calamari and show him?"

Elaine: "We were at a coffee shop."

Kramer: "Oh, they don't serve calamari at coffee shops."

Elaine: "...I know. I didn't expect to have to defend the reality of what calamari is when we made the date."

[-] JargonWagon@lemmy.world 51 points 1 week ago

Were you a writer for the show, what the fuck, this is so accurate

[-] Reziarfg@lemmy.world 47 points 1 week ago

It's shockingly easy. There was a whole reddit subreddit dedicated to inventing new Seinfeld scripts

[-] Zagorath@aussie.zone 22 points 1 week ago

I've only ever seen a couple of episodes and I was shocked at how well this script fit what I've seen.

[-] buttnugget@lemmy.world 3 points 6 days ago

I’ve only ever seen a few episodes but I don’t know how accurate this is at all.

[-] trashgirlfriend@lemmy.world 4 points 6 days ago

I've only seen clips of it on YouTube and this also didn't make me laugh so I'd say it's accurate.

[-] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 19 points 1 week ago

George: "Didn't the health board shut them down?"

Kramer: "That's how you know it's authentic."

I've had this conversation

[-] grrgyle@slrpnk.net 2 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago)

Sushi Star, I miss you. Occasional food poisoning was worth $12 all you can eat. 😭

[-] AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world 3 points 6 days ago

With the health board even.

[-] TachyonTele@piefed.social 8 points 1 week ago

Damn. Bravo!

[-] goatbeard@beehaw.org 5 points 1 week ago

I can hear them. This is great

[-] boonhet@sopuli.xyz 100 points 1 week ago

Maybe man's Estonian. Caviar in Estonian is "kalamari" which means fishberry

[-] drolex@sopuli.xyz 9 points 6 days ago

"Fishberry" what the fuck, but also astoundingly correct

[-] cook_pass_babtridge@feddit.uk 4 points 6 days ago

Dawn, the plot thickens! Shows that we shouldn't be so quick to judge.

Having said that, if I was having this conversation in a second language, I wouldn't be so intransigent about it.

[-] anomnom@sh.itjust.works 3 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago)

Holy shit, imagine how frustrating it would be to be that guy is this was the case. Especially if one of the bystanders spoke up.

I’d like to hope they could all have a good laugh about it in the end at least.

[-] killeronthecorner@lemmy.world 74 points 1 week ago

Nice of him to get the red flags out on the table early though!

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Reminds me of that 4chan post where anon gets stopped by a stranger who tries to explain that Aluminum is the best metal. Anon tries to stay calm and explain the iron is the best metal, but the guy just kept going off about Aluminum and started talking about rust and ruined Anon's whole day.

[-] trxxruraxvr@lemmy.world 54 points 1 week ago

The concept of "best metal" without specifying for which purpose is pretty ridiculous, so to me the anon in your story is equally guilty of causing his own bad day.

[-] decipher_jeanne 12 points 1 week ago

Especially because the answer is obviously Tin

[-] Nerdulous@lemmy.zip 7 points 1 week ago

Real tin-stans would call it antimony

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[-] binarytobis@lemmy.world 7 points 1 week ago

Aluminum is a weird choice because it’s almost always alloyed with other metals.

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[-] Underwaterbob@sh.itjust.works 44 points 1 week ago

An ex and I were on a bus trip to a city about an hour away from where we lived while we taught English in Korea. The subject of there being a "subway" in said city came up randomly. She said she thought she had seen one the last time she was there. I had been there more times than she had and said there was no subway. She doubled down. No, she was quite sure she had seen one near the university. I doubled down, I've been there quite a few times. There's no way they have a subway. It's not even big enough for one! It got pretty heated. This went on for some time. Feelings were hurt.

She was talking about the sandwich restaurant, and I was talking about underground trains. We were both right.

[-] aeronmelon@lemmy.world 19 points 1 week ago

If you need to Well, actually… on your first date, all your dates will be firsts!

[-] PM_ME_VINTAGE_30S@lemmy.sdf.org 8 points 1 week ago

Well actually, any subsequent dates wouldn't be my first ever date /s

[-] qarbone@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago

Keep this up and we'll upgrade you to having 0 dates.

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[-] plyth@feddit.org 8 points 1 week ago

Now we need to know what OP thinks calamari and caviar are. It could be a 6' situation where guys invite girls to caviar but order calamari. First hint is that she uses singular for calamari.

[-] SlippiHUD@lemmy.world 6 points 1 week ago

I've been the side guy in a similar date in a bar. But instead of calamari is fish eggs. The dudes deeply held belief was the flat earth lie.

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this post was submitted on 20 Jul 2025
753 points (100.0% liked)

Memes

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