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Long story short: I'm (24M) American, and I'm visiting my long-distance Romanian boyfriend for the first time soon. In Romania, most cars are manual - including all the ones owned by my boyfriend's family (I'll be staying with them). I've never driven a manual before. His dad told me he can give me a quick lesson, and that I'm welcome to use their cars if I want; otherwise, I can rent an automatic. I don’t have access to any manual cars here in the U.S. to practice on, so I’m not sure what to do.

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[-] twice_hatch@midwest.social 1 points 1 hour ago* (last edited 1 hour ago)
[-] Adderbox76@lemmy.ca 4 points 2 hours ago* (last edited 2 hours ago)

I miss the prevalence of manual transmissions. Every one of my old first beater cars were manuals. But it seems that they've been phased out for the most part and it sucks. Driving Automatics isn't really driving (I'll die on that hill).

In answer to your question, no, it's not unreasonably hard to get the hang of as long as you accept the fact that you're going to stall it a few times at first and don't get embarrassed about it, you'll pick it up pretty quick.

In my experience, the people who struggle are the people who are too tense to learn because they're afraid of looking like a fool for stalling it while they're learning. Accept the fact that it'll happen, and you'll be able to relax and learn in no time.

[-] RBWells@lemmy.world 2 points 3 hours ago

Not if you already know how to drive, no. My kid who was motivated to use my car learned easily, and I learned it in a day when the rest of the people I was with were too drunk to drive.

But learning to drive in a new country? And manual at the same time? That seems more difficult. Can you practice here first? Does anyone you know drive stick?

[-] 0ops@lemm.ee 18 points 6 hours ago* (last edited 5 hours ago)

If you're anything like me, you have an easier time understanding how to do things if you understand how they work.

See the clutch in the diagram? The clutch is the part that actually connects the engine to the transmission. Mechanically, it's almost like a brake but reversed. To keep things simple, the engine side has a disk and the transmission side has a disk. When you press in the clutch pedal all the way to the floor, those disks will be totally separated and the engine can rev however you like because it's not connected to the rest of the drivetrain. As you release the clutch slowly and smoothly, you'll feel the clutch "bite": that's when the two disks make contact, but it's very light contact at first so they'll be sliding against eachother (think of gently applied brakes). The friction will still spin the transmission a little bit though, and if you're in gear the car will start to roll. As you smoothly release the clutch pedal more and more, the two disks will press into eachother more and more firmly, sliding less and less, until you've fully released the clutch pedal and the disks aren't sliding at all; the engine is totally connected to the rest of the drivetrain.

With most cars I recommend for a first step starting the car rolling on flat ground using only the clutch, no gas. With some cars you might have to give it a little gas, but in my experience most cars have enough idling torque to start from a stop by releasing the clutch very slowly and smoothly, I'm talking like 5 seconds or more to go from clutch fully to the floor and car stopped to fully released and rolling. Once you've done that a few times and you're starting to get a good feel for how the clutch behaves, you can start adding some gas to start more quickly and release the clutch quicker (but still smoothly).

The second thing to know once you're rolling is that the engine needs to run within a certain rev range, if you let it get too low (below like below idle rpms), you'll start to bog and maybe even stall, too high and you'll hit the rev limiter or possibly damage the engine if it doesn't have one. Knowing that, I think that timing shifts and knowing when to press the clutch becomes pretty intuitive, really all you need to do is press the clutch before the engine gets out of that rev range, shift up or down in the direction that gets you back into it (or maybe into neutral if you're stopping), and smoothly release. When in doubt just press the clutch, it won't hurt anything it just cuts power to the transmission.

TL;DR: The clutch connects the engine to the transmission. Press it in to disconnect the engine from the transmission, release smoothly to gradually reconnect. Start out only using the clutch to to get the car rolling, then once you've got the hang of that try adding a little gas to get rolling quicker. Shift in a way that the engine is always within it's rev range, i.e. press the clutch in and begin changing to a more appropriate gear before you start redlining or bogging.

[-] Jakeroxs@sh.itjust.works 3 points 5 hours ago* (last edited 5 hours ago)

I miss my manual a little bit sometimes, especially for shorter drives it could be fun.

Long drives with frequent speed changes, traffic or hills kinda sucked though. I had a pretty crappy Kia though lol curious how a higher end manual feels by comparison.

[-] starlinguk@lemmy.world 2 points 4 hours ago

I never minded manual until I got the crappy little Swift I'm driving now. It only seems to respond to swearwords.

[-] melsaskca@lemmy.ca 3 points 5 hours ago

Driving a manual is a bit tricky to start with but minimum practice and you'll learn everything you need to know. Everything else is experience. Once you've driven it for a while, especially through various weather conditions, you'll find that you have more control of the vehicle when driving a manual stick shift. Even three on the tree makes you more free.

[-] drmoose@lemmy.world 3 points 6 hours ago

Its pretty easy but takes time just like any machine operation.

It’s incredibly easy if you have any semblance of finesse with your feet. Rev up the engine, ease off the clutch until the rpms start to dip, then give it more gas and ease off the clutch until you’re fully going.

Before you even mess with the clutch play with the throttle. Get good and holding it at 1500 rpm, 1750 rpm, 2000 rpm etc. throttle management is just as important as the clutch.

[-] Bytemeister@lemmy.world 4 points 7 hours ago

It's not too bad. You can get passable in a manual with less than a day of practice.

There are a lot of good tips in here, but I'll add a few that seem to be missing/less prioritized.

Practice rev matching while down shifting. You'll be a lot more comfortable with the car if you can get into a lower gear faster. This will allow you to pass and accelerate smoother and with confidence.

Practice recovering from a stall (although you're probably going to do this accidentally anyway). Foot on brake, push the clutch all the way in, shift to neutral or 1st (I prefer 1st to get into gear faster), start the car, and get moving. This process should be fairly automatic and done within a second or two.

On that note, don't worry about stalling the car. It feels terrible, and embarrassing, but it's not really damaging the vehicle (might wear out the engine mounts a little faster, but no one really cares).

Most important, have fun!

[-] nutsack@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 10 hours ago

If you're like me then you drive it right away no problem. if you're like my sister svenika then you will never drive it once

[-] zxqwas@lemmy.world 20 points 17 hours ago

Like riding a bike. If you've never done it it's going to be hard but give it a few hours of deliberate practice you'll be fine.

And again like with a bike you should probably practice away from traffic to begin with..

[-] JustJack23@slrpnk.net 8 points 15 hours ago

Why do you need to drive in the first place?

[-] kSPvhmTOlwvMd7Y7E@lemmy.world 4 points 13 hours ago

hm i think you will need at least lime 3h of controlled practice tp get used to it. My gf learnt to drive automatic and after 3 lessons of 30min, she can barely start moving the car by herself lol.

[-] CandleTiger@programming.dev 9 points 16 hours ago

Learning to drive a stick is really easy if you have somebody to teach you well, but waaay too many people are like, "here, keep fucking up until the car doesn't go anymore or you figure it out, whichever comes first".

Hardest part is getting the car to start moving from stopped. Changing gears once moving, you can fuck it up a bunch and nothing much happens except funny engine noises and the owner starts making constipated-looking facial expressions. But if you fuck up starting from stopped, then you lurch around a bunch, stall the engine, and don't go anywhere.

To get started from stopped, without horrible lurches or stalls, do like this FROM A FLAT PLACE -- don't try anything with hills until you can make the car go on the flat first:

  1. IMPORTANT: adjust your seat so you can easily push the clutch (left pedal) in -- all the way to the floor -- without uncomfortable stretching

  2. In your driveway when there's nobody going to honk at you, start the car, put it in neutral, and practice pushing the gas pedal just enough to hold the engine at 3000 RPM or so. Not making crazy racing noises, just a nice steady "the engine is running normal-fast-ish" and hold it that way. Practice a couple times until your foot and your ear know what it feels like

  3. Put it in gear without moving -- gas off, clutch in and put the car in first gear.

  4. Gas on, steady at 3000 RPM, slooooooowly let the clutch out until you can just barely feel the clutch is engaged. Engine revs down a little bit, car starts crawling forward. Practice that a couple times, just let the clutch out until it barely starts doing anything, then put it back in, until your foot knows what it feels like.

  5. Now do it again, engine held at steady revs, clutch out until just barely engaged, then let the clutch out just a little bit more, so the car wants to crawl, and hold the clutch there. Car starts crawling. Keep the engine steady like you've been, let the car start crawling, don't even change anything, just let the car crawl. It will slowly accelerate until you're moving at some steady 1st-gear speed. Once it's come up to (slow) speed you can let the clutch out the rest of the way.

  6. Congratulations you moved a car

[-] x00z@lemmy.world 3 points 8 hours ago

IMPORTANT: adjust your seat so you can easily push the clutch (left pedal) in – all the way to the floor – without uncomfortable stretching

The person of the driving school who thought me how to drive told me to push in the clutch completely, and put your seat in a way that you would have your knee bent just a tiny bit.

[-] Successful_Try543@feddit.org 7 points 11 hours ago* (last edited 8 hours ago)

practice pushing the gas pedal just enough to hold the engine at 3000 RPM or so. Not making crazy racing noises, just a nice steady "the engine is running normal-fast-ish"

Depending on the type of car, this might usually be somewhere between 1500 and 2000 RPM (even lower for a diesel), 3000 RPM are more typical for a sports car.

[-] lime@feddit.nu 4 points 10 hours ago* (last edited 10 hours ago)

especially in a diesel even 1500 is too much.

Overall (and this is from a lifelong manual driver), I go much more by feel than I do any particular number on the tach, under normal driving circumstances.

[-] lime@feddit.nu 1 points 7 hours ago* (last edited 7 hours ago)

i can imagine. i've mostly had automatics, but when i was looking for my first car one of the candidates was an old saab with no tacho, it only had little indicators on the speedometer for where to shift. in that situation i imagine muscle memory is created pretty quickly.

There’s some of that, but you really do get a feel for the car, where it likes to be, how it likes to be treated/driven, where its limits are, and so on. As others have said: it absolutely does help you forge a more detailed perception of what your car is doing, and where the limits really are.

[-] lime@feddit.nu 1 points 6 hours ago

oh i know, i learned to drive on manual since most cars are manual here, i just haven't owned one myself.

that said, with electric power-steering and throttle-by-wire, there's no feel to get. it's all just dead, no matter how fun the clutch is.

[-] sem 1 points 10 hours ago

It's also typical for a Honda fit

[-] bigkahuna1986@lemmy.ml 93 points 1 day ago

Manuls aren't super hard, but there's definitely a learning curve you can't avoid. Since you'll be in a new country you'll have enough going on and don't want to add to any stress, I would really recommend renting an automatic.

[-] kambusha@sh.itjust.works 6 points 17 hours ago

Yeah, you're going to stall the engine in the beginning. A lot. That means turning the engine back on in traffic in unfamiliar surroundings.

Also, if you're going to be driving on any hills, you'll need a separate new skill set for a manual car.

Stick to automatic, but take the offer to learn.

[-] hydrashok@sh.itjust.works 27 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

This. It takes a bit to figure out the rhythm, but it’s not hard once you know how it feels. If you do try it, definitely be prepared to be frustrated at least once and stall the car at least more than once (I know I did)!

Once you figure it out, though, it can be much more fun and engaging (and sometimes more annoying) than an automatic.

EDIT: that said, if you’re really concerned about it, don’t be ashamed to rent the automatic!

[-] Agitatedpencils@lemmy.world 5 points 17 hours ago

I've found the hardest part is suddenly having any health issue with major extremities. Broke your finger? Crucial. Broke your leg or foot? Crucial. Having 2 functioning legs and 2 functioning hands is ideal.

[-] LordCrom@lemmy.world 9 points 19 hours ago

Take the lesson. While learning, stay off of hills and any upward incline until you got a feel from taking the car from full stop to going in 1at gear.

While learning you will stall the car.... Don't let it bother you.

The trickiest part is learning how to ease the clutch while applying gas to go from full stop to motion forward.

Remember neutral when coming to a stop.

Manuals are great, it's built in theft protection from like 95 % of people

[-] Onomatopoeia@lemmy.cafe 2 points 18 hours ago

Yea, getting the lesson from Dad is probably a great thing. He'll enjoy helping, it's good bonding time, and he'll have stories for the future!

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[-] gnu@lemmy.zip 7 points 20 hours ago

The basics are easy - half an hour with someone who knows what they"re doing should be all you need to get out and about. Getting to the point where it's instinctual and you don't have to think about shifting is probably beyond the limits of a short trip but depending on how much driving you do you can be fairly smooth within a few days.

The main risk you run with learning manual is that once you get the hang of it it spoils automatics for you - you might end up having to buy yourself a manual car to avoid being annoyed by the missteps autos tend to do.

[-] boletus@sh.itjust.works 1 points 11 hours ago

Modern autos with cvts are kinda at the point where it is basically magic. They feel like driving a golf kart that can reach 200km/h.

[-] banshee@lemmy.world 8 points 22 hours ago

Driving a manual is pretty easy, but it depends on how you handle failure. The learning process requires making a few mistakes while you become familiar with a clutch and shifting gears.

Also, I think it's much easier to learn if you know what the parts are doing. Watch some videos on how it all works and what different RPMs sound like.

[-] NigelFrobisher@aussie.zone 5 points 21 hours ago

The clutch biting point is the main trick - particularly on a hill start. In an automatic you can hear the gear shifts so that’s your timing.

[-] NeryK@sh.itjust.works 7 points 23 hours ago

Driving manual is not particularly complicated, but it will require you to focus a lot of attention on it at first. Since you also have to cope with with differences in driving regulations, this will put you and your passengers more at risk than necessary.

It takes time (~tens of hours) to build the muscle memory so that it becomes natural. For a vacation in the short term, you should go ahead with your plan to rent an automatic.

[-] hildegarde 14 points 1 day ago

Its not hard to learn but it does take time to become confortable with it. I recommend renting a car. Driving manual car for the first time with the added stress of driving in a different county is a recipe for disaster. By all means try it. Take up the offer of that lesson, but its unwise to have to rely on a manual car for transport when you've never driven one before.

But also make sure you actually need a car. The US is built with fully car dependent infrastructure, so americans are taught their whole lives to just assume they always need a car. That isn't the case everywhere, and might not be where you're going. Be sure to check.

[-] Horsey@lemmy.world 3 points 19 hours ago

Visit a AAA location and get an “international drivers permit”. It’s super easy and a good insurance policy for yourself. I highly doubt the police speak much English and aren’t corrupt, so it may save headaches. Also, watch out on neighborhood streets for potholes.

[-] thelsim@sh.itjust.works 2 points 18 hours ago

I took my driving lessons with a manual, but have been driving automatic for over a decade now.
Whenever I do need to drive a manual, I usually need a while to get used to it again. At those moments I make use of the guidelines that were taught to me by my driving instructor:

  1. Is for getting the car going and getting in or out of a parking spot.
  2. Is for speeds up to 25 km/h
  3. Is for speeds up to 45 km/h
  4. Is for speeds up to 75 km/h
  5. Is for anything beyond

It’s a simple helper that matches most of the common speed zones in the Netherlands (30, 50, 80). From what I can quickly read, the 80 zone is 90 in Romania, so it should still work?

Anyway, don’t worry too much. It is also nice not having to drive at all if it comes down to that, your boyfriend’s family sounds nice :)
Enjoy your trip!

[-] bdonvr@thelemmy.club 5 points 22 hours ago

It's not toooooo hard. But you will need a good little bit to get the feel for it.

And I don't know how hilly Romania is but the first time your stall out on an incline you will feel embarrassed and likely honked at. And it will be all the harder to recover cause now you're stressed about it.

[-] xavier666@lemm.ee 4 points 21 hours ago

I had almost no driving experience. And I learnt driving a manual in 10 lessons (30 min each). So depending on how much time you have, you can think about learning. Do mind that it will be frustrating initially.

[-] Zwuzelmaus@feddit.org 3 points 19 hours ago

otherwise, I can rent an automatic.

You want to double check whether you actually can do that.

Automatics are actually rare there. The kind of rare that turns heads and raises eyebrows.

[-] southsamurai@sh.itjust.works 4 points 21 hours ago

It's easy tbh.

There's a learning curve, but if you can walk while pulling something out of your pocket, you meet the minimum coordination test.

If you have a tachometer, it's a little easier to learn when to shift, but it isn't necessary at all, just a nicety.

No bullshit, I learned in a day, and was able to drive without grinding gears in maybe a week. Taught many people over the decades since. A day of practice that includes hills is all it takes to get the basics down.

When you first drive a different car, it may take a few miles to get a feel for the clutch and shifter throw, but that's about it.

It seems way harder than it actually is, assuming you have full limb mobility. If you don't, it can be a good bit harder.

When you first try it, just remember to get the clutch pedal all the way in before shifting, and you won't have trouble in that regard. Letting the clutch out in sync with the gas is where coordination comes in, so test any new vehicle in an empty parking lot or other open space that's flat, so you can get a feel for that safely. Once you have that feel, it's easy peasy again.

At this point, I don't even pay attention to shifting. It just happens without thinking about it as the vibration reaches the right level.

Hell, in my old car, I had taught dozens of people how to drive stick, and it got to 200k miles with the original clutch in it. That's how easy it can be to learn.

[-] chicken@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 points 16 hours ago

It's really hard, I tried for a while and gave up. Way too many things to pay attention to and get right at once, while doing something dangerous.

[-] x00z@lemmy.world 4 points 22 hours ago

Well not to be an ass, but why would you drive yourself around? I have the feeling your boyfriend and his family wouldn't mind driving you around for a bit. And in Europe you don't generally need a car to get around.

Anyways. Driving manual is not too hard. Just don't let the stalls bother you. Other drivers don't really mind either if you stall and waste a bit of time, so just relax. And to be honest; I would actually take the chance to learn it while you can if I were you. Seems like you have a good opportunity here.

[-] bstix@feddit.dk 7 points 1 day ago

Driving manual is not difficult, but unlike the opposite scenario, it's not something you can learn with only short instructions.

It does take time to develop the motor skills in order do it without thinking about it. The practice wlll take maybe an afternoon or two if you do nothing else. I'd advise you to do it over more than one day to allow yourself to sleep on it and come back at it

Once you've learned it, you'll never think about it again though.

[-] theunknownmuncher@lemmy.world 8 points 1 day ago

Takes a bit of practice to get the feel for it but it's not too hard. 90% of the learning curve is just getting the car rolling from a dead stop without stalling

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[-] spankmonkey@lemmy.world 8 points 1 day ago

You could rent an automatic, get the lesson, then see if you want to use their cars or keep the rental. I do recommend giving it a shot since it would be a new experience!

There is a small learning curve to manuals, and it is slightly harder in hilly areas.

[-] Graphy@lemmy.world 5 points 1 day ago

Driving a manual is easy if you already know how to drive. I got my lesson from a dude who sold me my first manual. You’ll fuck up a bit but you won’t break anything.

Take the automatic if you’re worried and just enjoy your vacation

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this post was submitted on 16 May 2025
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