All of the above. Let's party!

Wallace. Bet he's seen some shit.

Hannah, because in a few months she won't be just engaged so she will turn less annoying.

Also Wallace. I generally don't mind old people. Maybe I'm getting old myself but stay off my lawn!

Wallace

Wallace

Kinda wanna have Susan in your corner, tbf.

Dayzie

sdklf;gjkl;dsgjkl;dsgjkl;dsgsjkl;g

Absolutely Wallace. He looks like he prefers to work in dead silence - thumbs up.

Lewis for sure we can have competitions

Dayzie

I've had Hannah, Caleb, Wallace and Susan.

• Hannah is annoying at first, but it will blow over.

• Caleb will talk about sports and that will be all he talks about. You can tune him out, but he will learn to hate you, because you don't value his feats of manliness.

• Wallace is ok at first, but becomes really tiresome. His worldview is from 1920s, blatantly racist and doesn't realize it, judges you constantly according to some stereotype that is based on some guy he knew 100 years ago and gives you occasional corrective sermons that make no sense, because they are for that guy he once knew.

• Susan appears to be ok, but is a psycho. Will try to manipulate you and delegate stuff to you, even though doesn't even work in for the same department. Everything is a thing that will be decisive to your career and soon marks you down as a looser, because you don't listen to her. Will leave the company, because everyone is a looser.

Edit: so anyone in the top four. Office already stinks and on music is allowed.

Shiloh because I fuck with anyone down with Gary Numan.

The answer is Wallace. Every old dude with a desk near me has been a solid guy who shuts the fuck up and always makes coffee before I get in.

Wallace. In a heartbeat. Cause if someday he doesn’t have one, I’ve got my own office!

Jacksepticeye

Wallace.

Dude just wants to shut up and work, make it to retirement. You could probably engage him about his grandkids or his fishing trip if you wanted.

All the rest of them are gonna want to bother you with their problems or hobbies.

I'd be fine with several of these.

Brice: I've never understood people's distaste for that smell. I won't microwave tuna in an office because I know others don't like it, but it wouldn't bother me.

Wallace: probably has some great stories, but also likely wants to shut up and get things done. Great combination if handled correctly.

Shiloh: hey, you can play anything on your headphones, I'm cool with that. But if you want to play stuff on speaker it's only fair that we play 50/50. (My secret: I could totally do up to 75% Radiohead)

Dayzie: again, not a smell that tends to bother me.

Shiloh, i like Radiohead

Shiloh all the way.

Disturbing lack of DEI on this meme

I used to sit next to someone like Hannah in an open plan office. She was lovely. Really happy and excited for her future.

I'll take Hannah, Shiloh, Caleb or Wallace, and some noise canceling headphones.

Hannah: Get her to invite me to the wedding, meet her friends and all the social circle. Very helpful to grind that social experience

Caleb: dude is probably shredded and knows not only how to eat healthy, but, by comparison, will force you to eat healthy as well. Probably can help with grinding the social experience as well

Wallace: if you get him to open up and share his work experience, this could be the teaching of a lifetime. Also helps to grind the social experience as he probably has young nephews, and family gatherings to invite you

These 3 are my best choices

Meh Dayzie or Caleb, I don't use deodorant and I do a bunch of exercise. Exercise then shower, and I have a smell, but it doesn't smell bad. Most people just smell like people unless they aren't taking care of themselves.

Wallace.

Lewis or Wallace. or both, so I can have fun hearing them fight

I wear all-natural deodorant too. It's microwaved-tuna flavoured.

Tough crowd. I would go with the farter. Everyone farts.

"Natural deodorant" is usually just a block of an aluminum salt crystal, which'll work just fine since that's the kind of stuff in "industrial" deodorants too. Stains more and dries out your skin though since you usually end up with way more of the stuff in your pits, which is sorta ironic I guess.

So I think I'd go with Shiloh or Dayzie?

shiloh seems fine, walice is probably sound.

Wallace is my boy! We ride or die together!

I can't fucking stand the zeal today's youth has for life.