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i decide what rule you get (lemmy.blahaj.zone)

submitted 3 days ago by chocosoldier to c/196

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[-] herinaceus@sh.itjust.works 7 points 2 days ago

On the bright side, all the bans for ~~promoting the ban of an abusive harasser/troll that encourges suicide~~ gatekeeping, and instance blocks from annoyed-by-all-this-shit users has pretty much defederated blahaj! What a wonderful outcome.

I guess it's not that serious, just not fun to see this be the result of "queer space gets trolled." 😑 I might join the folks instance blocking, but it doesn't feel great. I've known plenty of trans folk. Over all, they were chill as fuck, and are generally enjoyable to talk with. But holy farking shitballs, if exposure to this instance was all I knew about GNC/trans people, I'd assume most are insane and love drama.

[-] TheCoolerMia 9 points 1 day ago

being insane and loving drama is when you demand respect for people's identities apparently :p

that's literally the only "drama" Ive seen here ever from blahaj users except for usa political discussions which I mostly ignore, I know lots of pretty crazy queer spaces that r genuinely like that while this is one of the most chill corners of the internet Ive been to

[-] herinaceus@sh.itjust.works 1 points 1 day ago

[removed by mod]

[-] ada 2 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

The person you're referring to has literally been banned from this community by the community mods. Wind your identity gatekeeping back, because you don't need to invalidate someones identity to moderate them

[-] herinaceus@sh.itjust.works 2 points 1 day ago

Cool story bro. I'll get right on that, and wind the "gatekeeping" (that I totally do all the time) back. Very valid concern to express. 👍

I suppose if my identity was valid enough, I'd get blocked by tons of users, then temporarily banned from communities, but not the server, for the same actions. Oh well. I guess identities are only seen as valid when people are being disengenuous. Neat.

Good luck on pushing anyone towards giving half a shit about queer people, including other queer people, or allies. Being an asshat really helps, I've heard, so try that maybe.

You're welcome for the entertaining display of taking trolling seriously. I guess this instance on a username is like a badge of "this person is a troll, to be avoided."

[-] chocosoldier 1 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

you talk an awful lot about how terrible it is to be here, you even started the discussion by musing about blocking this instance, and yet after two days you're still here whining without an ounce of self-reflection and taking anything anyone says back to you as personally as you can manage. shit or get off the pot.

[-] chocosoldier 1 points 1 day ago

Your identity doesn't shield you from being a bigot though, or from twisting yourself in terflike knots to justify misgendering others.

It's very strange how many professed nonbinary, fluid, and agender people suddenly have an issue with gatekeeping what gender is or isn't and whose is worth acknowledging based on arbitrary criteria and narratives about personal virtue.

[-] herinaceus@sh.itjust.works 2 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Name one single time I have misgendered someone... I'll wait. And while you're at it, get a fucking grip, and quit alienating any and every person you don't agree with, based on shit you just make up, and decide they've done.

I guess my gender is only "professed," and I hide behind it...

-deleted unnecissary context-

Internet dwellers like yourself are exactly who I was referring to in the first comment. Living for dramatic horseshit, just to make other people feel lesser is genuinely a sad existence. Maybe find a hobby. Adopt a cute animal. Do fucking something with your life that makes you happy. Something that isn't mindless vitriol directed at random people you'd don't know.

You're welcome for the free advice, ~~and mini truama dump~~. I hope you enjoy shitting on the ones that gave up.

(edited to delete trolling-induced, poorly-expressed, small trauma dump)

[-] chocosoldier 1 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

this is ironically by far the most unhinged and least self-aware screed i've read in this community over the past several days. you gonna challenge me to fight you irl too?

[-] herinaceus@sh.itjust.works 2 points 1 day ago

Neat. I guess me genuinely expressing a part of what I've been through, related to gender, and contextualizing where I stand means... fist fighting irl? ok...

I'm am folding on this one. You win, I guess. Me being verbose, or whatever you're attempting to say = violent, transphobic bigotry.

[-] chocosoldier 1 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

"directionless wad of animosity crying victim and living for dramatic horseshit just to make other people feel lesser" seems more appropriate but sure you can choose the "violent transphobic bigot" label if you prefer. unlike some other people i'm not in a hurry to decide whose identity is and isn't valid based on how shitty i think they act, or color a person's entire existence a certain way based on a handful of internet comments.

[-] herinaceus@sh.itjust.works 2 points 1 day ago

So, "sheilding my bigotry" is a valid use for my identity, and accepted? Cool.

I guess I haven't come across the people you just made up tho. The ones that called someone's identity invalid for their actions. Oh well. Have a good rest of your day.

[-] chocosoldier 1 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

bruh you've been mad phobic the entire time you've been concern trolling here, and it's painfully obvious because every single time you preface it with "trans people aren't [bad quality]... but you are" as if to admonish us for not being "the good ones". truth told at this point i'm mostly just seeing how much reportable shit i can get you to say because it's clear you just came here to stir the pot.

[-] herinaceus@sh.itjust.works 2 points 1 day ago

Mkay. So I'm a troll, stirring the pot for no reason.... While you (totally not a troll) are attempting to squeeze "reportable shit" out of every interacton, on a post that is bait.

Go find someone else to try to force "gatekeeping" comments out of. You're wasting your time.

[-] chocosoldier 1 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

you came to the post i made, days after the fact. most of the replies are you throwing a shitfit and getting indignant because there are rules.

to quote the only queer person you seem to respect, "get a fucking grip, and quit alienating any and every person you don’t agree with, based on shit you just make up, and decide they’ve done."

[-] SoleInvictus 6 points 1 day ago

Anyone "pretty much defederating" wasn't an ally anyhow. Lots of "I respected the transes until they said I couldn't pick and choose which are the 'good ones' for their space". They didn't participate before so nothing will likely change.

The whole argument doesn't even make sense. Whether or not the two individuals in question are trolls has no bearing on the situation. It DID give bigots, trolls, and perpetually online rabble rousers a very flimsy excuse to start shit and start shit they did.

[-] chocosoldier 3 points 1 day ago

cool, there's the door. don't let it hit your ass.

[-] SquatDingloid 3 points 1 day ago

Queer spaces don't need to validate trolls to be inclusive

[-] chocosoldier 2 points 1 day ago

who gets to decide who's avowed gender is "trolling"? what's the potential harm there? "oh no i called a person on the internet by pronouns they asked for but don't use irl, oh noez i have been owned".

versus handing phobes a pretense to misgender anyone they please, which honestly feels like the point of all this.

[-] SoleInvictus 2 points 1 day ago

It doesn't matter if they're trolls or not. In this instance, you respect the communication preferences of everyone present. If you find someone's behaviour to be problematic, you block them and/or report them to the mods. It doesn't give you or others a free pass to treat them as less deserving of respect than anyone else here.

If that's an issue, feel free to leave.

[-] SquatDingloid 1 points 23 hours ago

It doesn't matter if they are a troll, respect them.

Yeah people don't want to do that

[-] SoleInvictus 1 points 23 hours ago

Nice strawman there. What I actually said was:

It doesn't matter if they're trolls or not. In this instance, you respect the communication preferences of everyone present. If you find someone's behaviour to be problematic, you block them and/or report them to the mods. It doesn't give you or others a free pass to treat them as less deserving of respect than anyone else here.

If you have an issue with someone's behavior, block and report them. Their bad behavior doesn't magically give you a free pass to do whatever you want without repercussions.

I don't know why this is like high level calculus for some people.

[-] chocosoldier 2 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

it's a very simple concept, and it's both hilarious and depressing how apparently divisive it is. fun how many "allies" and fellow queers are in a rush to play the "hysterical trans person" card and pretend we're talking nonsense.

[-] SoleInvictus 2 points 22 hours ago

What blows my mind is they're repeating the cycle of oppression.

Cishet dominant society arbitrated what was "okay" for gender/sexual preference and we all had to claw our way into some measure of acceptance. Now ostensibly LGBTQ+ members are pulling a "fuck you, got mine" and drumming up excuses to exclude the outgroup that makes them feel icky. Just like always, the focus is on the outliers: supposed pedos, very unconventional pronouns, furries, etc. It's giving me flashbacks.

[-] chocosoldier 2 points 22 hours ago

if you keep them talking eventually they'll admit their motives in the form of an accusation, like that other person who was ranting for paragraphs about various queer people getting off on feeling superior, while calling people insane for respecting identities that person feels are beneath respect.