Blade Runner.

Maybe it was more impressive when it came out, but I watched it for the first time a few months ago and it was shockingly below my expectations for the reputation it has. Confusing plot, forgettable characters, a (very cool! yet) shallow, uninteresting setting.
I had heard that famous "tears in the rain" monologue some time before watching the movie and thought "wow, that was awesome. I can't imagine how much better it is with all the depth and context that the movie will add." Nah, it's from a character who we know basically nothing about and comes out of nowhere with no connection to any part of the story-- if anything, the context of the movie detracts from the cool monologue by turning it into a "what is this guy even talking about" moment.
Thematically it had potential with questioning the line between the humans and human-like robots, but they don't go anywhere interesting with it. When it's a theme that's been explored by everything from Ghost in the Shell to Fallout 4 to Asimov, I'm gonna need at least a molecule of interesting development to happen before my jaw drops.
2/10, not recommended.

The Substance

It looks like everyone involved felt like they were making something super deep and meta. The plot fully relies on every character making the worst and unrelatable choices imaginable. Insteadt of deconstructing the sexist, male gaze the camera revels in it and all that is accompanied by the most nervegrinding disney-esque sound design.

Pretty much any of the popular comedy movies. The Hangover, Hot Tub Time Machine, Elf, etc.

I don't hate it, but I can't understand the wider appeal of it, Nightmare Before Christmas. I don't understand why people think the Jack and Sally relationship is so great. She pines away and he's to self absorbed to even notice that she is a girl. And there are people who to this day still make it their entire personality. It is a decent movie, and I like the music, but it's not that great.

"Sit down I've got a movie I want you to watch. It's called What's Eating Gilbert Grape."

• some dumb wrong people I know

Donnie Darko.

It was so overhyped back when it came out because the OG hipster crowd of the early 90s thought it was cool, as did younger people who valued things that were “indie” as if that inherently adds value.

I can't stand Love Actually. It's too schmaltzy and none of the characters are likeable. Especially the young boy.

Oh it's worse. I read the book and it was very sad. And the movie was clearly changed from the book for sake of IP laws, reminding us of how sorry our own dystopia is.

It really needed an Oh Brother Where Art Thou ending where Wade and the gang fail to win but get well-off enough from their exploits and are seen by the public as leaders of the revolution against IOI's monopoly, and the capitalist system as a whole.

One of IOI's sixes gets the final key but when he signs the contract, it locks him out. The OASIS controlling stock remains in escrow pending ?????? with IOI as the default benefactor when... something future undisclosed event happens.

Which would set it all up for RP2.

It's one of those books like the Harry Potter series in which it feels more like it was intended to be easy-to-market, but is not very strong as a story.

Interstellar. Slow, stupid and the ending. That fucking idiotic ending. I still regret the 3 hours of my life I lost to it.