I don't care how "nice" someone is, I'm Trans and if someone disagrees with my basic rights then they can piss off.
And no decent person needs to be trans to agree.
If anything, any “decent person” should be angry as hell that there are people out there not being treated decently. Because that’s just fucked up.
This is why I kept getting so angry during the pandemic. Refusing to even just wear a mask can straight up hurt, if not kill others. How can someone care so little to be unwilling to do that small of a compromise?
I had a family member refuse to visit an elderly sick family member because they'd have to wear a mask. Made me so angry. So much respect for them just evaporated.
Now where I live it's illegal to wear a mask unless for a medical condition (but it's up to the cop to decide so that means White? Ok! Brown? $1000 ticket and/or jail!)
Long Island: home of the arrogant entitled asshole Trump voter.
Generally speaking, I've found people who issue incredibly hot takes on trans rights when its just an abstract issue come around when they actually start meeting and getting to know trans people.
My wife's uncle took a near-180 position on trans rights after his now-son transitioned. He'd gone on these little grumpy talk-radio fueled rants ten years ago. Now - if he still feels that way - he mostly just keeps that shit to himself. Occasionally he says something genuinely supportive or at least passively benign, to the effect of "I don't see why its such a big deal, people need to just let each other live their lives peacefully."
I also gotta say, these ideas don't crop up ex nihilo. When someone disagrees with basic human rights, its often an idea that was planted by some kind of right-wing propaganda channel. Sports Radio is a constant vector for the worst possible opinions from the sleaziest imaginable people. The AM Talk shit that gets blared across every major city is pure brain-cancer. And YouTube's algorithms are filled to burst with the smarmiest bigots on the internet, getting front-paged thanks to thick walleted bigots with an ideological incentive to propagate this crap. If this wasn't constantly in the air, attitudes towards trans people would immediately improve.
Some folks are legit blackpilled on trans rights. But when its immediate friends and family, I've found they're a lot more flexible and tolerant towards people they know than some vague fuzzy abstracted-away trans person. Once they realize what they're listening to and turn that shit off, their positions improve dramatically.
Yeah idk. I cut off my parents because they continued to support trump and refused to use my preferred name after I came out to them. They gave me some bullshit about how "respect goes both ways" and that I have to "honor" them by allowing them to use my original name, but obviously that doesn't fly when 1) the name they gave me is exclusively masculine and 2) the name is literally the religion they follow which I hate. All while telling me they want me to go back to church / seek god as if that will somehow help with my gender dysphoria, despite knowing the truth that all they'll try to do is convert me back to being cis. I was hoping they'd come around, but I'm also not at all surprised they didn't because they've been stuck in their stupid backwards thinking for so long.
They gave me some bullshit about how “respect goes both ways”
"For us to respect how you want to life your life. You have to respect how we want you to live your life."
This is what they're actually saying, and yes its bullshit. If those are the rules they live by, then you should also be able to tell them how they live their lives, which I'm sure they'd balk at immediately.
As usual, they only care when it affects them.
Also, though, this is one of the reasons that Republicans are against college. Because college is often the first time people are exposed to people from other walks of life, and that exposure is the most effective way to make them realize that people are just people.
However, this doesn't mean that I'm going to stop concealed carrying around Republicans and cutting them out of my life if they express even an ambivalent attitude about the issue, because I don't trust anyone who can still support that political party and they need to realize that their actions have consequences. Make bigots ashamed again.
I can’t be friends with someone who votes against my ability to access my medication, and my rights to access healthcare and employment without discrimination. If you are voting for people who think of people like me as subhuman, then you don’t respect me enough to be my friend.
The entitlement of the average right winger really is something to behold.
I don't highly enforce my pronouns. Not because it doesn't effect me but because being labeled a troublemaker who is hard to get along with is a career limiting move... And some interactions are so limited that it's not worth creating social awkwardness to self advocate. Days where this happens a lot make me depressed, grumpy and eats into the energy I have reserved to enjoy my leisure time.
Which is why it is so frustrating that some people demand that calling me by my dead name or refer openly to my sex using pronouns I hate is completely consequenceless that even when I tell them the only reprocussion to them is that I will not like being around very much them they get angry. Like I am cheating them of being owed that I automatically enjoy their company.
They are so bloody sensitive that the consequence of me thinking they are kind of shit to be around is somehow a tyranny. I just wanna yell at them like dude.. You keep bringing attention to the physical body that represents my least favorite aspects of existing by mentioning directly in conversation because that's what words like "she", "her", "girl" and "woman" mean to you. You might as well be openly talking about my fucking genetalia because that is your only qualifier for using those words. You are reflecting the things I didn't like about about the experience of myself back at me. If I openly referenced your least favorite physical trait every time casually in conversation how much would you enjoy being around me?
They are egoists who deal only in proclamation of truth.
You stating that it's even possible for you to not enjoy their company under certain conditions is offensive to their narcissistic ideals that they should be loved unconditionally by all without earning it.
You embracing an identity that falls outside their homogenous narrow-minded gender binary is offensive to their narcissistic ideals that the world should cater to them and only them.
They are people who failed to shed their ego as they emerged into adulthood and now it controls them, and they have decided to pin the blame for all of their problems on people like you. You're better off not interacting with narcissists at all. They're walking fountains of delusion and you can never say anything that will make them see you as a human being and a peer of equal value.
Gods I would love to not interact with these narcissists... But I also would like to eat and sleep under a roof and I kind of need to pay the bills so unfortunately dealing with them is the everyday cost of doing business. Is it fair that I labor beneath additional burdens at my work because of dumb political nonsense mischaracterizing everything about people like me and people feel justified in making my life more difficult ? No. But it's a union gig that pays $15 dollars more than other jobs requiring related skills so I sell my mental health peicemeal so I have a shot at affording to keep my family secure.
I really wouldn't care if they were random people booing me on the street because then I could just avoid them but the thing is my not putting up with these people holds tangible losses and narcissists are very good at getting themselves into positions where they are the ones who sign the cheques.
That is actually a really good explanation for that whole scenario
Politics are people’s ethics and morality applied.
It is perfectly valid to judge people over them, and to shame people because of them. Just like you’d shame someone for littering.
Or even more aptly: just like you’d shame someone for using the N word. It is perfectly legal; it is NOT acceptable.
The problem with a two party system is that it polarizes the grey areas where a lot of people don't have friendship or family ending feelings. When people subscribe whole heartedly to party mindsets they gain friends in that group but wall themselves off from others.
When people subscribe whole heartedly to party mindsets they gain friends in that group but wall themselves off from others.
This is when people make their political views part of their identity. If the party does something that you don't agree with you are faced with two choices (sub-consciously); either you change your views to match the party, or you invalidate part of your identity. Depending on how big a part of your identity you have subsumed to the party; the harder it is to break that part of your identity.
It is always a worrying sign when someone says "I am a "; rather than saying "I support ". Support can easily be modified and revoked, your identity is not so easy to change.
100% People who think that disagreements about other people's right to exist are just matters of taste reveal how deeply hateful they are. This is not a matter for compromise.
They'd probably go something like, "but I don't have a problem with you existing (if you happen to be in their "in" group), it's just others who aren't you I don't want to exist, why do you have a problem with that??"
Same type of person who thinks they can completely fuck over one person without affecting their relationships with mutual friends, like everything is a set of one on one relationships that can't overlap.
Very, VERY much depends on HOW we disagree politically.
and if Trump being a FELON And RAPIST isn't enough to get you to overcome the Democrat bias you were raised with.. you are a sad, disgusting person. No, we cannot be friends if you support him. Kamala: I want to support the working class and help people buy homes. Trump: I will immediately punish everyone who has opposed me. The two sides are not the same. Maybe before Trump you could pretend they were. They weren't.. but the GOP kinda pretended they weren't fascist POSs. Project 2025 just fucking comes out and says it. They want to overthrow democracy.
Of course you can have differing opinions and be friends. There are obviously scales of importance.
If you believe people with a different skin color than you should be slaves, we won't be friends.
If you believe Trans rights shouldn't exist, we won't be friends.
If you believe climate change is a world ending catastrophe and all cars should be baned we may be able to be friends because I disagree on the baning of cars.
If you think gun reform is required we will probably be friends but we will probably have different ideas of how to go about it.
i CaN hAvE A dIfFeReNt oPiNiOn, bRo! Gaawd!
(Fascism is not an opinion. It's a fucking disease.)
This reminds me of the, "We can negotiate and find a middle ground" argument. No we fucking can't. Your opening position is so extreme that there is no possible way that we can find a middle ground because even the middle ground would be too extreme for me to accept.
Exactly.. if person A wants to kill 1 million people and person B wants NO people killed Should they compromise on only killing half a million?
We can't be friends. Ok. But we can still fuck. Right?
They literally crashed grindr. So yes.
I have friends from all over the spectrum (both kinds). I don't care if they're assholes or arrogant, but I appreciate they're politically motivated and fight for what they believe in.
Being friends with them also helps deradicalize them. If they're a good person, why not be a ground truth to help them see what's going on?
Part of the issue is, what we used to think of as "politics", the discourse about what's best for society and what will lead to happy lives for all, is rarely spoken about. What we have now is "RAGE-politics", where people insert completely ridiculous non-sequitur concepts about who's at fault into the minds of malleable victims and have them frame it as an identity.
Insurrection is not a political point of view.
If your political opinion includes the phrase " you should die"
It's going to be hard to stay friends
It is appalling how divisive American politics is.
That's your takeaway? How divisive!
This is some cult bullshit. Build a narrative that paints large segments of society as irredeemably monstrous, say good followers morally must not engage, except with hostility, that's obligatory. This is a toxic mindset incompatible with a functioning civil society.
My Dad thinks protestors should be shot. That isnt political, its moral, and I am NOT obligated to make room for that energy in my life.
This Insistence that we allow all levels of extremism in our life (always only leveled at the left of course, a Republican would be lauded for exercising their right of association if they, say, deny a job applicant on political grounds) is just another grasp at total control by conservatives who are finding increasingly less room for their bullshit in the real world.
Fuck you, fuck conservatives, I don't owe any of you shit and if you want something from me you should stop being fascist weirdos.
No one is saying kill them, they can't exist, or we can't have a civil discussion about topics. We're saying if you hate people because of who they love, their race, their gender, etc., we're not going to be friends. They can learn to have some compassion and we can revisit.
It's not a high bar to cross my dude. Ain't asking for them to become communist soldiers at my command. I'm simply asking that you don't call my wife and friends existence a crime against humanity and God himself. Thems is fighting words boy.
My brother didn't believe there were homeless children and didn't want universal healthcare because it would support fat people.
How do I just carry on as if that isn't simultaneously hilariously stupid and depressingly evil?
My political opinion is that I'm gonna cut your dog's face off.
So where we getting lunch?
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