I think I look good in heels. They accentuate my amazing calves.

They’re designed to give the illusion of a longer leg, and long legs are traditionally seen as a desirable trait for women to have.

This man has obviously never met someone with a foot fetish…

Heels can be helpful for certain activities. For example, I once had to drive a rental moving truck for several hours and the seat was too high. I could reach the pedals but could not rest my heels on the floor.

At the first rest stop I swapped to a chunky heel and was able to complete the journey with better ergonomics.

Guess you wouldn't like nipple piercings either, huh?

To be honest, I love the sound they make. Also: I work in a library.

Your first three could be considered factually correct but the last is pretty easily disproved. High heels make your legs stand more taught and generally makes you claves, thighs, and ass look better. Plus it's a general rule of thumb that humans like people who are tall. People will gladly trade inconvenience to improve their appearance and the fact that high heels have persisted seems to imply people think they look better in them

Here's an example of the same woman in various types of shoes and while this is a matter of opinion, I think she looks best in the block heels followed by the kitten heels:

If you disagree then you're in the correct place, but it's really less about the feet and more about the change in posture

I look good in heels. I wore a pair at my college graduation. I only wear them on special occasions and I carry a pair of flats in my purse.

OK.

And the "clonk clonk clonk" down office hallways. lol.

Are they designed for maximum volume?