It’s my birthday today.
My friend offered to get me a gift. Not sure what I want, maybe a Kmart milk frother?
Chilling on the couch with my radio show on then I guess some footy watching and playing Hogwarts.
Low key day today but a little concerned I haven’t heard from my dad yet. He sends me a birthday message every year without fail but he has been sick lately.
Anyway I sent him a message just to let me know he’s ok because it’s so unusual for him to not contact me today.
Gratitude thread (not really feeling it today tbh but I guess this might help?)
I'm grateful for giving myself grace for royally fucking up at work that will cause a headache tomorrow (fuck the shape of 50 cent pieces for jamming the cash machine). It's not the end of the world.
I'm also grateful for the nice orchids I saw.
I'm grateful for the roof over my family's heads and for generally being a calm person. Elder said the other day that he misses me being around during the day "because you've got this aura of calm around you." 🥹This is one of the nicest things he's ever said to me, to anyone.
I am grateful for savlon antisceptic cream.
Over the last few weeks have been so uncoordinated in the gardn, kitchen, moving stuff and sharpening knifes that 100yrs ago would probably need some sort of amputation.
I'm grateful for finding an unused Brother colour laser printer for $100 on Gumtree, and lunch in the sun with a friend at friends of the earth on Smith st.
I'm grateful for gyoza!!!!! And for tram drivers that dgaf if you fare evade for a couple of stops. And for the tax return I did yesterday... and this little pack of Victorian grown hojicha that a colleague gave me.
I’m grateful for being able to catch up with a friend yesterday to celebrate my birthday.
Was nice to get out and be social but it was still deathly cold.
Since it just happened so is fresh in my memory, I guess I'm grateful that my building isn't on fire and the firies cleared it in about 10 minutes. But that feels like cheating, so I'm grateful for the views up on the rooftop, and having a Barbie and a chat with the old LT up there
FFS autocorrect I wrote "isn't", do not change that to "is" you stupid robot
Those orchids are beautiful! I’m grateful for the abundance of movies, tv and books available so easily without leaving home. It’s nice to chill out at home on a Sunday afternoon and pick entertainment on a whim.
I’m grateful to have got some decluttering done and cleared quite a few boxes from storage. I have a hard time parting with stuff for a number of reasons, so this was a big deal for me. Still heaps to go but it’s good progress.
I am definitely getting tired and ready to call it a day. I just thanked someone because I opened the door for them.
Mr P has finished remaking his bed out of bits of the broken/destroyed bed plus other timbers, and there was much swearing and insults while trying to get it into the house. Hey, don't get shitty at me, I'm not the one who constructed a thing too big to fit through the damn door! We ended up putting it through the living room window and it just fit through. He hasn't done too bad a job, but I'm not praising it on principle because he shouldn't have smashed it up to start with.
Edit: ok I probably will praise it a little bit. While I'm still a bit miffed that he broke the bed in the first place, it is actually pretty impressive to be able to make yourself a bed.
Fuck me. I heard evacuation alarms coming that I thought were from the shops so I went out to film the response and then alarms started going off in my building. Fucking RIP the people on the 22nd floor. I got confused going down the fire escape from the 2nd
I'm outside now, not wearing any shoes, but I ain't fucking dying in an apartment fire. So I'm just chilling half dressed outside barefoot. FML
Also this is the first time I've ever heard the "woop woop woop, evacuate now. Emergency" myself. Luckily common sense kicked in and I fled down the stairs. But I left my keycard in my room, so when they clear it I'll have to get buzzed back in
Edit: apparently a fire sprinkler pipe in the car park got hit by a car and burst, which triggered the entire evacuation system. The fireies have to stop it from flooding without affecting the rest of the fire system before we can go back in. I guess flying out without grabbing a pair of shoes or my keycard was an over reaction, but I guess it means the whole "get out and do not grab ANYTHING they taught me in kinder and primary school worked
clarification
Okay so I realised I didn't explain this well. I heard the "woop woop woop" off in the distance and assumed it was the shops down the road. I didn't see anything on Vic emergency so my first thought was pretty much "oh FFS I hope there's not another stabbing" so I went out to my balcony and started filming (I heard sirens approaching). Then I heard the thingy in my room start going off and it took a few seconds to click that it was my building. So then I ran out the door and forgot where the nearest fire stairs were (there regular stairs that head down to a courtyard, as well as 2 sets of fire stairs near the elevator). Completely missed the exterior stairs lmao
Anti-gratitude thread.
My headlight died. I just changed the bulb a couple of weeks ago.
This mild stuffed up ears and nose can go in the bin.
Punched a wall yesterday removing render and now have a raw knuckle that is all swollen and nonworky. I need that finger to pick my nose, dammit
A friend of mine passed away less than 2 months ago, and now her son has messed up big time (no sympathy, he really screwed up in a stupid unnecessary way) and is going to jail, I'd say for a long time. His boys lost their beloved Nan and now their Dad in less than 2 months and I'm pissed off about it. Also, the oldest of the boys is friends with my boy but I don't know the mum, so they probably won't see each other anymore. The kids are nice kids, but their little world has changed so much in such a short time, and I really feel for them.
I put a studio subwoofer (weighs about 50kg) straight into a wall yesterday trying to get it down stairs on a trolley. Such a stupid mistake. I've fixed the hole (sort of) but everytime I walk past I just shake my head :(
I am utterly ungrateful for the stupid dangling bits on the seam of my socks that have given me a blister
Well I pretty much already did this, but I'm still annoyed so will do it again. Google nerfed my maps timeline. There's only 2 reasons I stay in the google ecosystem: 1. Google timeline, and 2. Google photos. But if those donkeys keep breaking everything I like them I'm going to cancel my Google one membership, finally purchase unraid, and build a nice little google free lifestyle where people don't break everything for no reason. I'm still annoyed about them killing the mobile MyMaps app
I see a lot of partnered people making some big compromises for various reasons...for the kids, for finances, because they are scared to be "alone".
At this point in my life with control over my own space and what I do, it would really have to take someone extraordinary to feel as though they were adding to my life rather than me making big sacrifices.
And honestly the thought of trying to date in the hope of that elusive someone feels like a very big gamble with poor odds. If you enjoyed dating and meeting new people, the process even though you don't win might be bearable, but I don't really care for it tbh.
If this stage in life is not conducive to a relationship, or is pleasant enough without one, then you're under no obligation to have one, regardless of the opinions of family and friends. I have a lot of regrets over how little time of my younger life I've really lived for me.
Otherwise, I think the important thing is to find someone who wants the same as you, no matter what that is. If you're a "meet in the middle," compromising person then it's important that the person you're with also has those qualities, or you'll find you're always the one having to be flexible, and may end up feeling taken advantage of. If you're an individualist who wants to have a lot of independence and "room to move" within a relationship, and can't bear the thought of "living in someone else's pockets" then it's vital to live true to that while that's how your life is. A couple of friends of mine are very career forward people, spend a lot of time separate from each other due to the demands of their careers, but undeniably love and respect each other and aren't clingy. It's perfect for them. How do you know how it's going to be with someone? You don't always, or you think you know people but then they change, or you find out things you didn't know. The arrival of children can complicate things that before seemed much simpler and more straightforward.
I sacrificed a lot for someone who hurt me for over 8 years, in varying ways. I grew up abused and it set me up for abuse later on because I had no idea what was normal. I almost had a kid with the cunt (thank fuck I made my own money and bought a plan b pill).
But I would never let myself do that again. I know so much more now, about people, the world, and right and wrong. I got extremely lucky my one-night-stand turned out to be my person. We're better together than we are separately. But if I hadn't of met my current partner, I think I'd still be single after leaving my ex. Dating seems so dangerous now for vagina-owners (what with the tater-tots and "alpha" male shite).
I'd never change myself ever again for another person. I'd compromise (like quitting smoking), but not on the big things (buying a house, having kids, etc).
Love makes you compromise. Love makes you sacrifice. If you have love for one another those things are easier.
A person who loves you would never ask for compromises on important things like belief, children, vocation. etc
@wscholermann @Seagoon_ Fatherhood means - after a while you prefer the crust. All relationships involve some form of compromise. It takes a lifetime to find a good one and maintain it. My marriage and family life is worth it. I see more material on throuples and other arrangements, but that stuff is for my kids gen to work out - looks like a lot more work
bloody hell. Good days work there, considering how hard I went yesterday.
Concrete pile moved, future food garden area cleared to the point where I can take out the last of those bloody stupid brick and concrete dividers, both green bins filled and a spillover barrel. 10K steps well and truly in, so I'mma gonna eat a giant bag of chips and watch a shitload of WWDITS w00t w00t
The day of darkness begins much earlier than wanted. Power goes out shortly. Boo! Overusing heater in the hope warm will hold for a bit, then decamping for mini golf and boiling a ham hock.
Butt frozen
I didn't make it to Fairfield, but I did go to Hawthorn and probably spent a bit more than I expected to - picked up frozen tempeh from Grand Laguna because few places have the proper stuff, splurged on some mapo tofu flavour packets (I don't use doubanjiang enough to have it in my fridge), got some tofu to use and some to freeze (I hear it has a good texture when frozen and defrosted), bought a bougie Flinders lime, and... most excitingly of all...
...dropped $13.50 on a 30-pack of frozen Osaka Ohsho veggie gyoza from Japan. I cooked up 10 just now, but I have leftover oil in the pan and dipping sauce, so the only right thing to do here is make some more. What a travesty 😩
The worst part of a migraine, is when it subsides, you're in a state of hypervigilance in case it returns.
Bed, cat, iPad games and feeling sorry myself for today I think lol
Sky full of ice crystals - sunset should be fabulous tonight.
Last night was the first night post-solstice I noticed the sunset lasting a little longer. Thank goddess.
Google made another one if their little annoying and breaking changes (as they do). They've basically killed maps timelines, at least as they used to be. They tricked me into signing up for it. I know a lot of people don't like timeline, but I really do. Firstly it's the only tool I have to make sense of some of the moves I've made over time and is the only real record I keep of the places I visit, secondly I export the timeline data onto a heatmap that shows me where I still haven't been yet.
They have this "encrypted backup" thing now, but even submitting a takeout request doesn't give me the actual timeline. And of course this "local" timeline is hidden amongst all the system files I can't even access, and is probably in some proprietary garbage encrypted format.
I'm guessing they probably did this to comply with some legal requirement, but that doesn't make me feel any better. I just want to generate my place heatmaps FFS. They're still using my timeline history for advertising and "personalisation", the only thing that's changed is instead of it being stored somewhere else I can access conveniently, it's stored locally but fucking impossible to reach
cold
Whoopsy fingers slipped and I bought some more art, this time two canvas prints of the following:
https://www.etsy.com/au/listing/1609446726/sage-green-bauhaus-exhibition-poster
I'll calm down after this and stop buying art for a while.
That was funny. Grabbed a takeaway breakfast from a local cafe and went down to the beach to eat it, and was promptly bailed up by the local gull population and an opportunistic cattle dog.
Owner was very apologetic, meanwhile I was laughing too hard to get out a complete sentence. 😂
Been forcing some daffodil bulbs in water to hopefully get some indoor winter blooms. They seem to be growing well, looking forward to flowers in a couple weeks. It's way easier than I thought and would recommend it as a project if you've got a sunny spot for them. Might try tulips next.
Bit cold today but sunny so I think I'll take the boys for a bit more of an off road ride and check out a picnic ground and such nearby
I wish I could sing like La Roux. But I just sound like a hippo in heat when I sing.
Still gonna do it though lol
Everybody's doin' a brand new dance now
C'mon baby do the loco-motivation
I know you'll get to like it if you get off the couch now
C'mon lazy bones do the loco-motivation 🎶
I told myself after yesteday that I wasn't going to lie around in bed all morning today, but what did I do - stay in bed until 12 on my phone despite how UTTERLY BEAUTIFUL it is outside.
Well alright. Can't change the past; getting a load of laundry in while having a late cuppa and cake; once it's out to dry I am going to walk to Fairfield (3.8km away) and back to get bulk wool wash and the tortillas I had been planning to make jackfruit tacos with.
Then home to do a whole bunch of cooking and an online catchup with an overseas friend.
I wonder if my lazing around so much on weekend mornings is due to the sheer amount of caffeine I have during the week. Brain needs to recover from all the adenosine receptors being flooded.
Sky pretty
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