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Crypto is an un-backed and unregulated security -- the value of which fluctuates wildly. Turns out most people don't like being paid in something that can drastically lose value in the span of hours.
The few people and institutions that accept crypto as payment either immediately convert it back into real money or are "investors" treating it like the security it actually is.
most money throughout history has been "unbacked" and unregulated
I'm assuming those quotes are referring to fiat currency. Faith in the solvency of the issuing government, widely agreed upon exchange rates, and regulated prices of goods are all forms of backing. Sure: you can argue that's "not enough" but crypto "currencies" don't even have that. Hence why their values fluctuate by the minute -- which defeats the entire purpose of "money".
... government controlled central banks and entire bodies of law exist to do just that. Nobody is regulating crypto.
Crypto lacks the features that make money "money". It doesn't have a relatively stable, agreed upon value. It's not easily exchanged for goods or services. It technically can be used as "money" but that's true of anything -- trading cards, a pile of gravel, etc.
government controlled central banks are a new phenomenon, and money existed long before them.