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this post was submitted on 26 Jun 2023
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Feminism
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So true! I have a lot of anxiety about keeping my job. I was laid off twice in one year (first for not folding on my desired career path, second for a company acquisition) shortly after having my second baby and going through a divorce from an abuser, so I don't deal well with work conflict any more. I'm the only earner in the house, and I'm not sure I'm mentally well enough to handle another "layoff." So I'm in the folding mode, but it's hurting my already fragile mental health.
The self-deprecating tools are things like helping someone else come up with my idea so it doesn't come from me, making it clear that I'm just advising, asking leading questions, small talk, etc. I know they aren't great, but it's hard to let go of things that have protected you. I'm way too blunt for my own good, naturally. I'm looking into the possibility that I am autistic, after that possibility was raised.
Yeah, I'm autistic too. Self-deprecating tools helped kids who felt intimidated by you on the school ground back off. Professionally? Eh. How much trust would you have in someone who always tell you how much they don't trust themselves? Think about when you encounter it in the wild and how off putting it can be.
Sometimes it reads as "are they fishing for validation?" too. you always gotta be careful of that!