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Kink at pride discourse sucks
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this post was submitted on 06 Jun 2023
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i guess my only further comment is: yeah, i am. what reason have i been given by any conservative since Stonewall—no matter how "open" they are to not considering us faggots—to not do that?
i honestly think this position is naive at best, and when it comes from a queer person it generally indicates a failure to look at the history of conservatism as it relates to queerness. i just don't think you should care about anything these people feel about us—nor should it ever be your priority to appeal to them, no matter how numerous they are. and even being apathetic to most conservatives is probably too nice, because they certainly do not turn the other cheek when it comes to how they feel about us.
but also: you have not demonstrated this "moderate middle" of sorts exists, much less cares about any of what you're talking about here—and i just categorically do not think what is allowed at pride should be tailored to a hypothetical person when there are very real people who get joy out of openly being who they are and have a long history of coexisting at pride with no issue.
There are lots of moderate middle sorts who accept gay men, but think that the trans agenda is a threat to their children. I suppose we should throw them under the bus, too. Maybe then daddy will love us.
You realize that conservatives aren't the only voting bloc that votes republican, right? You understand that, yes? Genuinely? You understand the concept of moderates?
Additionally, I can agree that they should be allowed at pride, but I don't have to like it. I'm not arguing in favor of banning it, just that I personally don't like seeing it.
I believe you are laboring under the misconception that moderate Republicans can be swayed out of supporting queer exterminationists by appeals to queer people's humanity and decency. This is not the case.
My dad loves me, his openly queer child. Like, really genuinely loves me. I know because he's forgiven me for doing some truly awful shit to him. He's an amazing dad in some respects. He does not think there should be any legal prohibitions on queerness, and I don't think he cares much one way or the other about queer people. He also votes for queer exterminationists on the regular.
It's not as though I've never tried to point out how this hurts me, either. I have made it very clear to him that I feel betrayed by him continuing to vote for people who want me dead. I have told him directly that it endangers me. He apparently does not believe that I personally am in enough danger to warrant him changing his voting patterns, or perhaps he believes that the alternatives are more dangerous to me somehow. I'm not entirely sure.
Granted, I don't know if my dad counts as a "moderate Republican." He considers himself a libertarian. But I believe he is the sort of person you are talking about: a fence-sitter. Someone who isn't really an ally but doesn't outright hate us either. And I think his response is typical of those people.
Some people will simply never, ever give a shit about something until it becomes their problem. This is how you get genocides: Not by the majority being violently bigoted, but by the majority being apathetic.
What do you do, then, if you can't appeal to their compassion? The only option I can see is to become a group that is Not To Be Fucked With. You hit us, we'll hit back harder. Bigots won't let us live and moderates won't help us thrive. All we have is one another, and we have to unite and rally around our shared interests in order to save ourselves. Respectability politics only divides us, and we can't afford that.